Adoptive Family Articles

The joy that new parents feel after adopting a baby is just as great, if not more, as giving birth to a baby.

For example, speak with any adoptive couple about adopting a baby and you will hear the same sentiments time and time again: “We didn’t know we could love something this much”; “Our dreams have finally come true”; “We don’t know why we waited so long to adopt our baby.”

Those same people had dreamed their whole lives of becoming parents, yet struggles with infertility made it impossible for them. Some spent thousands of dollars, months and even years on infertility treatments, trying to make their dreams of parenthood come true.
 

Foster parents are very special people that provide a tremendous service for children in need. Couples must understand that being foster parents can be a lot of work and can be a very emotional journey because of the unpredictability of the fate of the foster child.

This is why it is recommended that couples entering into the foster care system are doing so because they want to become foster parents, and not just adoptive parents. 

The differences between private and state adoption are immense, with each having their own advantages and disadvantages, depending on the adoptive couple.

The following is an overview of some of the main factors that adoptive couples should consider before choosing a private or state adoption.

Transracial adoption refers to the adoption of a child that is of a different race than that of the adoptive parents.

While some adoptive families may wish to adopt a child of the same racial background as themselves, others choose to diversify their family makeup by adopting a child of a different race or ethnicity. Throughout America, there are thousands of blended families as more couples choose to open their arms to children of all kinds of backgrounds.

While every adoption professional has a different interpretation of what a closed, open or semi-open adoption entails, the following is a description of how American Adoptions defines each type of adoption.

Open Adoptions

While many adoption professionals have varying definitions of what an open adoption is, it typically means that the birth parents and the adoptive family speak prior to and even after the child is born. This may include phone calls and face-to-face visits. Some adoptions of this nature are very open, with the adoptive family and birth parents exchanging contact information and agreeing to periodic visits by the birth parents as the child grows. It is also common in open adoptions for the adoptive family to mail pictures and letters to the birth parents.

Risks exist in every type of adoption. It is ultimately up to the adoptive couple to determine what risks are acceptable to them and which risks are unacceptable.

Some of the most common risks involved with international adoption are discussed in this article. Adoptive families considering international adoption should speak with their adoption professionals about potential risks, in addition to taking the time to talk with other adoptive families who have adopted from the same country and orphanage. Adoptive families should also consider talking with medical professionals who specialize in working with international adoptions to discuss any potential medical concerns or risks.

Risk: Country shutting down or suspending adoptions
Some countries suspend the adoption petitions for periods of time while they review adoption policies and procedures. During suspension, adoptions in process are halted, which can lead to very frustrating delays. Be sure to research the countries you are considering as some countries more frequently suspend their petitions than others.

Risk: Safety
American couples adopting intenationally have not been well-received by some countries and may face a strong anti-American sentiment during visits to the country they are adopting from. Additionally, couples adopting overseas are cautioned that language barriers may cause confusion when filing adoption paperwork or communicating with the foreign adoption agency or orphanage.

Couples adoptive overseas may also be the targets for fraud or extortion in some countries. 

Risks exist in every type of adoption. It is ultimately up to the adoptive couple to determine what risks are acceptable to them and which risks are unacceptable. Some of the most common risks involved with domestic adoption may include:

Risk: Birth mother changing her mind
This is a very common fear for adoptive couples exploring adoption. This is a possible risk with domestic adoption, but this risk is often sensationalized by the media and is subject to misinformation. Reports tell of birth parents coming back years later to regain custody of the baby they placed for adoption. Many people are led to believe that international adoption is safer than domestic adoption for this reason alone.

The truth is that yes, birth mothers sometimes do change their minds about their adoption plans. This typically occurs during the pregnancy, or shortly after the birth before any legal documents have been signed. At American Adoptions, approximately 80-85 percent of birth mothers stay committed to their adoption plan while 15-20 percent change their minds at some point during the process. While it is evident that while this risk does exist, it is often not as frequent as many believe.

In most states, birth mothers must wait 24-72 hours before they can sign the adoption paperwork that relinquishes their parental rights. Every state has different adoption laws and in some states, a birth mother's decision is irrevocable immediately after signing the legal documents. In other states there is a period that allows her time to revoke her consent and change her mind about her decision. In reality, most birth mothers change their minds during their pregnancy or shortly after they deliver and before they sign any legal documents. Many people believe that a birth mother can change her mind for as long as a year after the birth and fear that they may lose their beloved child at any time. Unless the adoption agency, attorney or adoption professional did not follow the law, the fear that a birth mother can show up on the family's doorstep years later and take the baby back is simply not true. This is why it is vitally important that the adoptive couple hire a reputable and experienced adoption professional to assist with their adoption process.