Adoptive Family Articles

Adoption can impact a child's life in many ways. While it once thought that it was best to keep a child's adoption history secret, today adoption is celebrated by families across the world as a positive, beautiful event that makes each adopted child special.

For many generations it was often thought that adoption was a secret to be kept -- that women who placed a child for adoption should never speak of their child, that adoptive families should never share their child's adoption story and that it was in the best interest of the child to be kept in the dark regarding their history. However, this secrecy often lead to hurt, confusion and anger by each member of the "adoption triad" (the birth parents, the child and the adoptive family). This secrecy often cast a large shadow over adoption, often making it a negative aspect of a person's life, rather than a positive one.

However, times have changed. In today's world of adoption adoptive parents are more open about their child's adoption story. Many families even celebrate their child's adoption each year as a family tradition. Many children are taught from their earliest years that they were adopted -- and that being adopted meant they were immensely loved by both their adoptive parents and their birth parents. They are brought up knowing their adoption story from the very beginning and grow up to be proud of the fact that they were adopted and that their birth parents loved them so much that they made that difficult choice to choose adoption. Many are even so touched by their adoption story, that they grow up to be adoption professionals, such as Jennifer, an Adoption Specialist with American Adoptions:

When I was growing up, all I really wanted to do was marry the man of my dreams and start a family. I married the man of my dreams but the family part was not able to be, at least not biologically the way most people plan. After many failed pregnancies, we made the decision to adopt an infant. We knew we both wanted to be parents and we knew we could love a child the same regardless if we gave birth to him or her.

We began the adoption process. We quickly learned adoption is not as predictable as having a child biologically.  When you give birth to a child you know a due date and there is a set timeline. With adoption, it started by completing tons of paperwork.  We then had a social worker come to our home, so she could approve us to be parents. Consider that for a minute.

When you get pregnant no one has to approve you to be a mother or father.

We were scared to death that we would not be approved for something as minor as having a disorganized sock drawer that wasn't clean enough. When the social worker came to our home, she never looked in them. Of course our sock drawers were perfectly organized. 

My wife and I were not blessed with the ability to bear children. We were pregnant 8 times and each time there was a problem, causing my wife to lose the baby. I promised myself if I was ever allowed to become a father I would do the very best I could do as a parent. We wondered if God thought we were not fit to become parents. Finally, He allowed us to become parents through adoption. An adopted child is truly a chosen child. If a couple can bear children they do not have a choice on the child they receive. Adoption gives you choices and I believe God places the right child with the proper family. Our son became one of the favored children in our respective families and there was absolutely no difference because he was adopted.

The day the Adoption Agency placed my son in my arms, I became a father, a king and the proudest man on earth. I could not believe God was entrusting us with his finest creation, a child. I have no way to say what it is like to become a natural father, but I can tell you there is no way it could be any better than adopting a child. I could not love a natural child any more, or maybe even as much as my adopted son.