Is the domestic adoption process risky?

Risks exist in every type of adoption. It is ultimately up to the adoptive couple to determine what risks are acceptable to them and which risks are unacceptable. Some of the most common risks involved with domestic adoption may include:

Risk: Birth mother changing her mind
This is a very common fear for adoptive couples exploring adoption. This is a possible risk with domestic adoption, but this risk is often sensationalized by the media and is subject to misinformation. Reports tell of birth parents coming back years later to regain custody of the baby they placed for adoption. Many people are led to believe that international adoption is safer than domestic adoption for this reason alone.

The truth is that yes, birth mothers sometimes do change their minds about their adoption plans. This typically occurs during the pregnancy, or shortly after the birth before any legal documents have been signed. At American Adoptions, approximately 80-85 percent of birth mothers stay committed to their adoption plan while 15-20 percent change their minds at some point during the process. While it is evident that while this risk does exist, it is often not as frequent as many believe.

In most states, birth mothers must wait 24-72 hours before they can sign the adoption paperwork that relinquishes their parental rights. Every state has different adoption laws and in some states, a birth mother's decision is irrevocable immediately after signing the legal documents. In other states there is a period that allows her time to revoke her consent and change her mind about her decision. In reality, most birth mothers change their minds during their pregnancy or shortly after they deliver and before they sign any legal documents. Many people believe that a birth mother can change her mind for as long as a year after the birth and fear that they may lose their beloved child at any time. Unless the adoption agency, attorney or adoption professional did not follow the law, the fear that a birth mother can show up on the family's doorstep years later and take the baby back is simply not true. This is why it is vitally important that the adoptive couple hire a reputable and experienced adoption professional to assist with their adoption process.

Keep in perspective that deciding on adoption is a courageous, difficult choice and some birth mothers will struggle with their decision to place their baby for adoption. However, once the birth mother's decision is made, most know they have made the right decision.

Risk: Birth fathers objecting to the adoption process
Many birth fathers in domestic adoption situations are unknown to the birth mother, or are not involved in the adoption process in any way. Many believe that this poses a problem with completing a safe adoption. This is inaccurate. The adoption professional must follow the state laws to try and locate or provide notice to any unknown birth father or identified potential birth father whose whereabouts are unknown or who simply is not in contact with the birth mother any longer. The birth father's rights will be terminated by the courts after these steps are taken to provide him notice. Instances of birth father's fighting an adoption are extremely rare. Additionally, there is no risk for him to come forward years later and state that he did not know because his rights have already been terminated. This is another crucially important aspect of adoption and reason why an adoptive couple needs to work with an experienced, knowledgeable adoption professional.

There are sometimes situations where a presumed birth father comes forward during the pregnancy or right after birth stating that he objects to the adoption. This does not mean he will be successful at stopping the adoption just because he voices an objection. His rights depend on the laws governing the adoption. Some states have very strict guidelines and timelines the birth father must follow to have a chance of preventing an adoption. Typically, these include provision of financial and emotional support to the birth mother during her pregnancy and/or fitness related to criminal history, stability, etc. Other states do not have strict birth father support guidelines and therefore his burden to stop the birth mother's adoption plan is lower. In an overwhelming majority of cases, the birth father situation is known and explored prior to the adoptive couple being matched with a birth mother. Often, the adoption professional will know if the risk of the birth father being able to successfully contest the adoption plan is a minimal risk or a greater risk. The adoption professional should advise the adoptive couple accordingly so they can choose to proceed or not. Again, adoption situations where the birth father successfully contests an adoption are rare and the risk of this happening a year or more after placement is almost nonexistent as long as the adoption professional follows all governing laws.

Risk: Financial risks
Financial risks vary in domestic adoption depending on the adoption professional. Financial risks typically occur when a birth mother changes her mind or the birth father contests the adoption. Sometimes there are no financial risks, or the risk is very minimal, while sometimes the financial risks are greater. The adoptive couple can control the amount of their financial risk by learning what fees are paid upfront, what is refundable and non-refundable and how expenses are disbursed. Adoptive couples should ask specific questions to adoption professionals so they understand the financial risks involved for them.