The parties involved in an adoption – the adoptive family, the child and the birth parents – are often referred to as the adoption “triad.”

 

While the main focus in any adoption is the child, many potential adoptive families experience some anxiety regarding the birth parents. Couples may worry about the birth parents returning years later to “take back” the child, while others worry that the birth parents won’t like them. All are normal concerns in any adoption, and thousands of adoptive couples have experienced those same emotions.

 

The birth parents will know all of the information you provide in your Adoptive Family Profile, which includes first names, the state you live in, your profession and any other information you choose to divulge. Our agency will not provide the birth parents with last names, addresses or phone numbers a family chooses to share that information with the birth parents. If a birth parent wishes to speak with an adoptive family prior to the birth, our agency will facilitate those calls as to retain the confidentiality of the parties involved. After the adoption, our agency will also facilitate the exchange of written letters and pictures between the adoptive family and birth parents.

 

The adoptive family will know the birth parent’s first names, the birth parent’s medical history and the state that they live in. The birth parent’s social history is also provided to the family for the child's benefit. The family will also receive all pre- and post-natal medical records for the baby.

 

The answer to this question rests solely on what the birth parent desires. In today’s world of domestic adoption, the birth parents often choose the adoptive family for their child. This process is as unique as the birth parents themselves. While some do wish to meet or speak with the waiting family before or after the baby’s birth, other birth parents choose not to have any contact. However, families can rest assured that if a birth parent does wish to speak to the family, our agency will help the family prepare by suggesting topics of conversation, addressing any concerns the family may have regarding this interaction and will provide a strong support for the family.

 

Yes. Nearly all adoptive families experience some anxiety regarding meeting or speaking to the birth parents. This is a normal emotion couple’s experience during the adoption process. Our Adoptive Family Specialists speak to families each day who are experiencing anxiety regarding interaction with the birth parents. We will address each waiting family’s concerns and help prepare them for the meeting or phone call.

 

Waiting families can gain a lot of from meeting with or speaking to the birth parents. While this can be a terrifying prospect for some couples, it can also be an immensely rewarding one – for both the waiting family and the birth parents.

 

Birth parents wish to speak with adoptive families not to “interrogate” them, but because they are genuinely interested in speaking with them. Birth parents put a lot of thought and consideration into choosing a family for their child – it is a natural emotion for them to want to speak to the family they have chosen. This simple phone call or meeting can do a great deal in affirming the birth parent’s choice to place their baby for adoption.

 

In addition to affirming the birth parent’s decision to choose adoption, speaking with birth parents can also greatly benefit the waiting family. This interaction will allow the family to share those memories with their child as they grow. As adopted children grow up, it is normal for them to be curious about their biological children. Families who speak with the birth parents are able to share those stories with the child and will help to answer some of the questions the child may later have about their adoption story.

 

No. Once an adoption is finalized, the adoptive family is recognized as the child’s family by law. Although adoption laws vary state to state, the laws remain very clear. Despite sensationalized media stories in a few high-profile cases, post-adoption revocations are extremely rare and are usually a result of illegal or unsound legal practices.

Many adoptive families fear that meeting the birth parents f may lead to the birth parents “taking the child back” weeks or years later. However, this is untrue. Some adoptive families choose to adopt internationally because they feel that they will not have this issue, instead they prefer to not have any contact with the birth parents. However, international adoption agencies have reported that birth parents in foreign countries also inquire about the children they placed for adoption.