American Adoptions Message Board
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| kellee | Posted: Apr 12, 2006 11:25:46 PM
i like your open adoptionidea of being a frequent visitor and seeing te child grow first hand i have 2 kids of my own and this third on the way and well as it stands adoption seemsto be the brightest future for him/her i would love something like that but as it seems i will more then likely choose a family in another stat as to the paternals fathers wishes. but I would like for the adoptive family to contact me if they ever wanted any advice as to inharited behavior. both of my children had very similar wants and needs as a baby that only i knew how to ablige. or if the child got sick or something that could only be inherited i would like for them to be able to contact me directly for any answers hey may need or want or even just to call to tell me how they are doing every so often would be nic to. we wouldnt have to meet. but maybe a holiday or too would be nice.
| | Kara J | Posted: Mar 10, 2005 12:29:51 PM
Just wanted to say that you sound like a wonderful mother full of love for her child... If you are set on adoption, there is NO DOUBT that you will be able to find the "perfect family" to raise your child. Open adoptions are so fequent these days... many people including myself see it as just about the only way to go.... Who could have too many people to love them? A child who grows up in an open adoption has the best of both worlds... 2 families that love them unconditionally... who could ask for more? Just wanted to send a BIG ((((hug)))) your way and say that you are a really strong person! I truly wish you the very best of luck on your adoption journey and may you and the family you choose meet soon! ... Kara J
| | Anonymous | Posted: Mar 09, 2005 12:11:11 PM
I am looking for a family that will be very open with me and my involvement with my daughter. Ideally, I would love to feel like a part of the family. Like an aunt who visits frequently. Deciding to give my baby up has been, and still is, very hard. I cannot stand the thought of my baby growing up not knowing who I am or not having some sort of actual bond with me. I want to be there to see her grow up in person. I would like to find parents who live in a good neighborhood and are secure in their finances. I would prefer some sort of religious involvement because I think it is better for kids to grow up that way, even if they do not end up being religious in the long run. I definitely want people who are fun and have a sense of humor. I picture a couple in their mid-thirties. A strong and loving relationship between the adoptive parents andany children they may have is crucial. If I get to choose how my child grows up, I want it to be the best.
| | Angie | Posted: Jan 27, 2005 04:07:57 AM
TO: Colleen
the family i placed my baby with had a biological son. this had alarmed me at first and i wasnt sure that i was comfortable with it. however, as i saw the family in action, i realized that these people had so much more love to give, and were just awesome people. i love brent, Aalo, and luke to bits, i really do. Soon after placing, Aalo became pregnant and Jordan now has a little sister 11 months younger than her, so be prepared for that, because having the baby you wanted takes off all the stress and makes conception way easier. I've seen it time and time again. the best way to get pregnant is to adopt. personally, in an open adoption situation, i would have rather placed with a family that had a biological child than an adopted child. with parents that have an adopted child, it almost feels like they have expectations as to their relationship with you, and that scared me, so in my personal opinion, you have a much better chance of getting your baby with your biological child in the picture rather than an adopted child, as long as the birth mother see's all that extra love you have to give
| | Angie | Posted: Jan 27, 2005 03:59:05 AM
i got pregnant when i was 14, its a scary time. i didnt say anything, my mom just figured it out (its a really hard thing to hide, so it her parents WILL find out whether she tells them or not) however i do know, that my mom would have taken it a lot better if i had told her rather than just let her figure it out. leave it up to your friend to decide how her parents will find out, its not something you need to worry about because they will find out, just let her know you are there to support her if she needs it, and make sure you encourage her to tell her parents. my baby was adopted by an AWSOME family, and believe me, as long as her parents are not total pyscho's, everything will work out fine. I have been there, and know many other people who have been, and as long as she deals with it the right way and is given the love and support she needs, everything will work out, it always does
| | Macey | Posted: Jan 24, 2005 04:27:26 PM
my BEST FRIEND is pregannt. Were only 14. I htink shes scared about what people will think of her and how her family will react. I dont know if i should keep this a secrect or go tell her parents or anyone to help her. I know if i do go tell someone she'll get mad at me. But im trying to help her cause shes my best friend and im looking out for her PLEASE tell me what i should do about this whole thing.
| | Colleen | Posted: Jan 15, 2005 10:08:36 AM
I have just started my search to complete my family. I have been reading through all the boards to listen to all of our hopes and dreams. I am hoping to learn from all of you. My husband and I have known each other since 8th grade. We have been married for 9 years and been together for almost 15. We are both from close families and have 20 nieces and nephews. They are my joy...my heart...they are what make me a better person. I was there for some of their births and it was one of the most defining moments in my life. I have always know that I wanted children, yet it just has not happened yet. I do hope to have a biological child someday, yet I feel as if I could could be anyone's Mom and feel blessed. My husband and I know that we were meant to be parents and cannot wait for the days ahead....sunday morning breakfast then walks to the park, watching my child fall asleep in my husbands arms, we so want to give a child or children a home and a family and I know that someday I will. I guess my question is, how would a birth Mom feel about a family like mine who wants to continue to add to my family, with a biological child if I could? We are 33 and 34 years old, and hope that someday I will be able to conceive, yet I feel that I have so much to give a child that I don't want to wait if I was blessed enough to start now. I read about the Birth Mom who is carrying twins and want her to know, So many would feel honored by your gift. To all of you who have or are thinking about putting your child up for adoption, please know you are angels in our eyes. Thanks and may you all feel loved.
| | Heather | Posted: Jan 10, 2005 07:07:13 AM
Like tina said "every birthmother looks for different things in a family". With me I am looking for a family that is willing to adopt twins. I would like a family that doesn't have kids so they can experienc being parents for the first time. I say this because in my case that is what I would be doing. Experiencing mother hood for the first time. I also want a family that is close to one another, who knows each other inside and out. I want my babies to grow up having a happy child hood. Something that I did not have. I want my babies to know that they are loved by both of their parents. I want a family that can honestly say that when my babies are old enough to understand that they will be told that they were placed up for adoption. I have lots of more things to say that I am looking for but not enough time or space. If you are more interested my e-mail address if huff2goodatsports2003@yahoo.com
| | Vickey | Posted: Dec 22, 2004 04:53:13 AM
The perfect family is just that "FAMILY." They work together, play together, and pray together. They attend church, have family gatherings, and take a yearly family vacation. They are fair with discipline have an abundance of praise and love. They eat family dinners together and talk a mile a minute about their day. They attend open house at school, school concerts, or any other special event that happens and are totally involved in their children's accomplishments/defeats. A perfect family doesn't necessarily have to have a lot of money. They need something money can't buy, like good values, good parenting skills, and acceptance of the unacceptable at times. A family loves unconditionally. This is only a little of what a perfect family is to us. We have adopted two girls (older and and from different families and very backgrounds). I'm not sure there is a "perfect" family out there since there are no perfect people, but we have found in our hearts the ability to accept differences and to love unconditionally and know for sure that love and acceptance are the two most important qualities that can be found.
| | tina zimmermann | Posted: Dec 01, 2004 10:12:08 PM
Every birth mom is different and we all look for differnt things. For me it was all about music and art. I loved that and the family I choice thEy where a teacher of art and he taught music. ThEy also where older and had children allready. But as soon as I saw there profile I knew in my heart I found the family I was looking for. I think about openness you must feel comfortable about visit and sending picture and emails. How open is to open for you? Never promise a b mom visits if you are not comfortable with this. Maybe the b mom will not want visit at first. It's so hard at first in an open adoption but commucation is the most important aspect in a open adoption. Guidelines must be put in place in an open adoption. Whats going to work for your family and the b mom. I hope this helps some. I also say read up on open adoption. There are books that address this issue. Tina
| | Casie | Posted: Nov 26, 2004 12:08:09 PM
for those of you who are considering open adoption:
What is your perfect family? As much information as you can give would be great. A fun family, a religious family, a family with a big house, it doesnt matter, a family with other children.
what about visitation. What would be your ideal visitation schedule?
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American Adoptions, a private adoption agency founded on the belief that lives of children can be bettered through adoption, provides safe adoption services to children, birth parents and adoptive families by educating, supporting and coordinating necessary services for adoptions throughout the United States. For more information on American Adoptions please call 1-800-ADOPTION (236-7846).
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