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BOARD: Discussions for Women who are Pregnant » Couldn't Find Your Topic? Post a Message Here.

TOPIC: What do birthparents look for when picking a family?

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Christine	Posted: Jan 16, 2004 07:29:00 PM I could not agree with Michelle more. I am the adoptive mother of a 2 year old. His birthmother and I had so many similarities in our lives, when she was reviewing autobiographies of waiting couples she knew immediately it was meant to be, and I know our son was a gift from her and god.
Michelle	Posted: Oct 21, 2003 11:27:34 PM I am a birth mother and I can tell you that every birth mother is different. Some of the most important qualities that are looked at are how the family is going to raise their child. I am not going to say that looks and age will not play a part in it because there are many birth mothers that will incorporate that in their decision, depending on their age as well. However, there is also a feeling that you get when you look at a famlies profile and read through what they have to say. It is a feeling that cannot be explained but only felt. It is similar to the feeling that a family may get when they meet with that birth mother and child for the first time and just feel as if it were meant to be. I truly believe that everything happens for a reason and if you are right for a birth mother and her child than she will find you. Every birth mother has her own standards and qualities that she looks for in a family but ultimately they want someone who will love their child unconditionally and give their child everything that they can not provide for that child due to their given situation. When I met with my sons adoptive parents for the first time I just knew that they were right. I never doubted my decision to place my son because I knew that he was going to be in very good hands and that they were going to love him just as much as I did. I felt that connection instantly and to this day have never felt any differently. If anything the connection grows as time passes. They have given my son more than I could have ever given him and I am so thankful to them for that. They always tell me that I gave them the greatest "gift" in the world, but to me they gave me the greatest "gift" by giving my son and there's the best life he could have ever had. Keep strong and believe that when the time comes the right birth mom will find you and you will both know that it is right!
Annonymous	Posted: Oct 20, 2003 11:13:00 AM We are just starting the adoption process and I am wondering what characteristics do birhtparents look for in potential adoptive parents? Does age matter? Do looks matter? Or do you just see a family and somthing clicks?

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Do We Need to Look Like Movie Stars?

The adoption process is a very personal one for waiting families. First, they must provide financial, medical and other personal information during the home study process, then they share a snapshot of their personal lives in their family profile. It is perfectly normal for waiting families to experience anxiety about having their lives be such an “open book.”

Once a family is active with an agency and their family profile is being shown to expectant mothers, it is also common to experience some anxiety about what impression those birth parents are getting of the family. Many waiting families worry that perhaps they aren’t attractive enough – that they must look like Tom Cruise or Nicole Kidman to adopt a child. However, this is untrue.

Birth parents choose adoptive families for many reasons. To some birth parents, it is important that their child grow up in a specific region or state because they envision their child spending their days at the beach, or running through a field in the Midwest. Other birth parents want their child to be brought up in a specific religion and will therefore only consider families that are of that religion, while others want their child to grow up in a household with other children. Just as each adoption story is unique, so are the wants and desires of the birth parents.

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American Adoptions Message Board

BOARD: Discussions for Women who are Pregnant » Couldn't Find Your Topic? Post a Message Here.TOPIC: What do birthparents look for when picking a family?

Do We Need to Look Like Movie Stars?

BOARD: Discussions for Women who are Pregnant » Couldn't Find Your Topic? Post a Message Here.

TOPIC: What do birthparents look for when picking a family?