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BOARD: Topics of Interest for Adoptive Families » Other Topics for Adoptive Parents
TOPIC: Waiting couples wanting to chat continued...
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| Posted By | Message | ||
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| Patty | Posted: Mar 08, 2006 12:07:30 PM Hello girls! My name is Patty. (I posted on here several days ago but it didn't show up so I'll try it again) We adopted our son Nicholas on St. Patrick's Day 2002 from American Adoptions. The agency is absolutely wonderful, everything went smoothly. We are finalizing our family profile now for our second baby through AA. Yes, the paperwork sure has changed! There is so much I want to share with you but will do it over time, I do want to warn you that when you get to the hospital your baby is born in, be careful, we were walking up the steps to the hospital and a girl and guy were standing outside smoking, she had a robe on, we smiled and said hello, as we always do, then when we got up to the floor she was on they told us we had to wait in another room, we panicked, thinking she changed her mind, they didn't tell us why, here they were waiting for her to come back, yes it was the birthparents outside we said hello to!! She later, just recently put in one of her letters that she was unsure at the time but when we smiled and said hello, she knew we were good people etc. So just a heads up, you never know who you are talking to!! Also, I am curious can you all tell me how long you have been activated? It took us 6 months the first time... Good luck to all!! | ||
| Kerri | Posted: Mar 07, 2006 06:38:31 PM Hey Girls, It was so nice to read all of your posts!!! David and I are in the last stages of all of our paperwork for our second adoption..... boy how it has changed!! It truly is so overwhelming!!! The day after our first homestudy we were painting the nursery!! It was so much fun! It didn't make me sad one bit! I knew in my heart the day would come when I would be standing in that very room with my precious angel. My parents came up for Thanksgiving and off we went to Babies-R-Us for furniture. My parents bought it for us which was such a blessing! We felt like the wait went on forever...however when you get that call you totally forget the wait! It is so amazing! I find myself already thinking..... I wonder how long we are going to have to wait!!! So it really doesn't get any easier the second time around. :) I can't wait to read more from you all........ I am truly getting confused with all of the Heathers. :) I hope that you all have a very happy night!! Smiles, Kerri | ||
| April | Posted: Mar 07, 2006 01:17:19 PM Hey girls! I am so glad that I am not the only one that has had posting problems, I thought maybe since we are not adopting through American Adoptions that it was just me. I am so excited to tell you guys about a recent opportunity that I have been given. I was offered to be a Guest Writer for a very popular Parents/Childrens online site for a major city that we are trying to adopt from. The Vice President of the site asked me to write a story about our adoption journey for their main story in next weeks newsletter and she also let me include what type of adoption we were searching for and include our agency name and our contact information. I have also created our own personal website for our adoption which was fun! I put our pictures, story about us and our contact information. I included our webpage address in the newsletter story. I wish that I could tell you guys the name of the Childrens website so that you can check out our newsletter story next week but I don't think it is allowed on here yet but maybe when we are able to share things like this with each other I will let you guys know where to go to look at it. Amy I am so happy that you have decided to share your experience and ideas with us! I started buying baby stuff right away! I think it is good waiting therapy. I love looking around at all the baby stuff and imagining our sweet baby in them. We have everything set up including the crib,playpen,highchair,swing,stroller,car seat, walker, bouncer seat, etc! I couldn't help myself plus I didn't want the Winnie the Pooh Days of Honey theme to be discontinued so our parents bought it all up! HA! Between our parents and us we have half a closet full of baby clothes too! I just think it is fun and plus we will be more than ready when he/she gets here. Doris, it's so funny what you said about your husband because my husband keeps correcting me too! It's not "If" we get a baby but "When"! Well, I was just so excited today that's why I had so much to say! Heather (the one that started this chat!) I am so happy for you and your little angel! That is so wonderful that your home study agency thought of you guys! Wendy, I am so excited for you because you are so much closer to bringing your bundle of joy home! I think you really should start your baby shopping spree, it time to let loose woman! HA! It will be fun! Well, I will give someone else a chance to say something now!!! Talk to you ladies soon! April :) | ||
| Wendy | Posted: Mar 07, 2006 08:11:15 AM Heather B, Congratulations!! I remember how relieved I was when we were about to be activated. I agree with the aging!! We would like to have two children and right now I cannot imagine going through all the paperwork again. I am sure I will though, but I don't really want to think about it again right now. I cannot wait to see your profile, let us know when it is online. | ||
| Heather ( the one who started this post) | Posted: Mar 06, 2006 08:57:10 PM Wow, I have never had so many Heather's in the same place before. :) I was just thinking about all of you and AA today and wanted to visit. I am very thankful for AA and this posting opportunity. Please post freely as it will benefit you soooo much in this new journey you are on. The friendships you make and the insights you gain from each other will be priceless! Our profile is inactive right now with AA , so the new comers will not be able to see who we are, sorry. You can learn all about us in previous posts though. :) We did receive our blessing in November, Daniel Benjamin. It was the agency who did our homestudy that approached us with the placement. We waited over a year. Daniel had a rough start but is really amazing. God answered our prayers and had His perfect timing. The wait is definetly a rollarcoaster ride, but looking back it is easier to answer some of the why's and see how the puzzle needed to come together. Lean on each other and try to always look for the positives. Love, Heather | ||
| Doris | Posted: Mar 06, 2006 07:20:27 PM Hey everyone! I am so glad the chat room has been updated. I think it is really exciting that they are creating a chat room where we can share our email addresses. April, so glad you have your profile! Are you with A.A. or another agency? Amy, thank you so much for sharing your story. It sounded so exciting. Thanks also for your advice about buying things and being prepared. We have bought clothes, a pack and play, stroller, and car seat. However, we just ordered our nursery furniture this weekend because it was about to be discontinued and I was a little apprehensive about it. Your words were just what I needed. My husband also reminded me that it is not "if" we get a baby but "when". Heather B, I am so excited for you. Wendy thanks for your advice too about friends inquiring. Actually this was one of the first weeks at church when I didn't get asked over and over. There was one person but Brandon actually fielded the questions. Can't wait ot hear from everyone about your progress!! | ||
| Wendy | Posted: Mar 06, 2006 05:39:37 PM Girls, Sorry about the repeats in my second email. When my post didn't show up I decided to post again and then the first one appeared. American Adoptions -thanks so much for your efforts to give us more support and pursuing ways that allow us to be available to each other. Everyone at the agency has been so wonderful in every aspect of our waiting!! | ||
| Staff | Posted: Mar 06, 2006 02:55:19 PM Hi Everyone. Since American Adoptions is a licensed adoption agency we do not want to run into confidentiality issues by posting any potential contact information on our message board such as e-mail addresses or phone numbers. We understand this is a gray area but wish to protect clients that may have inadvertently posted confidential information. We are currently developing a chat room web site that would allow more open discussions to be posted and this site will have this confidential provision waived whereby users can post their addresses or phone numbers at will. Our hopes are to have this site available in the next 45-60 days. I apologize for any confusion this may have caused. Please feel free to continue to post on this chat! Thank you. -Staff | ||
| Heather B. | Posted: Mar 06, 2006 02:28:17 PM Oh my stars, ya'll!!!!!! Sean, Ryleigh, and I received our profile today!!!!! We are sooooo excited this means we are almost to activation. I think I have aged 30 years since this process began almost a year ago. (I too have experienced lagging post time, I just thought it was my computer.) Doris and Wendy, you have been sooo helpful, thank you for your support and prayers. Welcome to our new "waiters". I will let you know when our activation is a reality. Speedy matches for us all. Love, Heather B. | ||
| Wendy | Posted: Mar 06, 2006 11:01:19 AM Heather, We will be waiting for a year later on this month. I am planning to celebrate the day! We have made it this far and that only means we are closer to THE DAY! I do want to say though that Kerri, Mauri and some of the others on this forum have had much faster placements. Just remember that you can always be open to more situations, if you are getting to anxious. For me the wait was the hardest between months 7-10 and then I decided to just put it in the back of my mind. We are as prepared as we can be without the baby : ) I have thrown myself into my child care business and we are also working on getting a large room ready downstairs for a play room. We just moved into our new home (that we built) last year, so we had quite a few projects to keep us busy. That is a great idea to buy something each month, I will have to start doing that. Doris, I definitely have my hard times also. You might still have a fast placement, it has only been two months (seems like forever I know). : ) For me though I cannot believe we have waited a year already. It really did go fast!! One thing that might have helped me is that we decided to only tell very few close friends and family. I kind of had myself prepared to wait awhile and I knew it would be hard for me to handle questions from people. Hang in there and you could maybe tell the people that are close to you that you appreciate that they are interested in your life, but that you will definitely call them if anything changes for you. I know that is easier to say than do though. Let's keep talking! | ||
| Amy | Posted: Mar 03, 2006 09:46:10 PM Hi Again everyone! Well I have finally completed the very last piece of paperwork for our activation...that is a great feeling :) Even though this is our second adoption with AA, it is still very liberating to let go of the wheel. After all, there is not much we can control at this point.....So, here's something I can recommend all you first-timers can do with this "waiting time"...and it is something I will definitely do this time around...Pack a bag! Let me explain, when Jerry and I matched with our birthmom it was early Feb 2004, she was due on my B-Day (Mar. 8). Well, I got the call at work Feb 17 that she was being induced the next day !!! So I ran out of work, with all of my students cheering through the halls (I'm a teacher) and was on a flight 3 hours later. My mind was spinning...clothes were the last thing on my mind, so Pack a bag! Now here's the really great tip. Go baby shopping now, don't wait because you are trying to guard yourself from disappointment, your baby is coming and this time is your pregnancy as well, so go baby shopping....AND when you buy clothes, but really, really, really tiny layette clothes. Everything I had was labeled 0-3 and they were all huge. The hospital had to give us a donated outfit for our prescious miracle because all the other clothes where comically huge. And that pooh outfit I brought would have been so cute too :) So shop NOW and live in this wonderful moment of preparation and anticipation. I know that I didn't want to shop too early because I thought 'what if it doesn't happen'. You just have to let go of those fears, because when it's all said and done you will look back on this time as the prelude to the most amazing years of your life. | ||
| Doris | Posted: Mar 02, 2006 06:13:28 PM Hi Heather, welcome to the chat. We have been waiting for almost two months and I know what you mean about it being challenging. I am substitute teaching in elementary schools and I find that if I don't get jobs as frequently, it makes it harder because I am home thinking about it. I think it is hard because you always think in the back of your mind that maybe you will be one of those couples who gets matched very quickly and when it doesn't happen it is disappointing. I know in my head and my heart that we will be matched with the right child in God's perfect timing but there are times when I feel sad. This is often triggered by my friends who keep asking me if we have heard anything. I try to explain to them that it could happen tomorrow or it could be a year from now. They don't seem to understand that we really don't have any control. I know that they are just so excited for us but they don't realize how upsetting their inquiries can be. Wendy, I am amazed and in awe of your positive, upbeat attitude. I pray to have that same patient, trusting, and faithful heart. You are definitely an encouragement to me. Heather B., you are still in my prayers. | ||
| April | Posted: Mar 02, 2006 11:48:55 AM Hey girls! I hope everyone is doing well! I have tried to post several replys on here but they are not being put on for some reason. :( I don't understand it but I hope you get this one! We have our home study tonight. I am so nervous! I will be glad to have it over though! :) As I told you guys before, we were put on the waiting list even though our home study wasn't done yet so we have been on the list for 3 months now. I am excited to get the home study done so that I can just wait and not have to think about getting anything else done! I am hoping that will help me not have to think about it as much. I can't believe Sara got matched so quick and has her sweet baby already! WOW! That is very encouraging. I pray that it will happen soon for all of us on here! Take care! April :) | ||
| Jenn | Posted: Mar 02, 2006 10:07:43 AM For some reason the replies I've sent haven't been posted lately. I was trying to post my IM address -- maybe that's why. Anyhoo ... we received our profile proof a couple of days ago! Very exciting! Unfortunately, our home study is being held up b/c the FBI has rejected two of my fingerprint cards so far.:( I just sent my third try last night. It never occurred to us that fingerprints could be a hold-up. | ||
| Wendy | Posted: Mar 02, 2006 09:49:14 AM Heather, We have been waiting for almost a year. A lot of other people that I have met on this forum have had a placement. We recently made a few changes, so hopefully we won't wait to much longer. We are okay though either way. I have also been trying to really enjoy our ability to be spontaneous. What is your husband's name? I would love to see your profile. We are Elson and Wendy. For me the waiting was the hardest at about months 7-10. Now I have just decided that I will put it in the back of my mind for now. We are as ready as we can be without a match. We even started a registry at Target for some of the basics and figured we will add to it later. Wendy | ||
| Heather | Posted: Mar 01, 2006 12:47:23 PM Thanks for the Reply! We have no other children. This will be our first. The wait wasn't that bad at first, but it has been getting more challenging. I mainly stay busy with work and focus on appreciating the freedom that my husband and I have now. Every month we treat ourselves to something fun, and purchase something for the nursery. This way we have all the basics; plus it is fun! How about you? How long have you been waiting? | ||
| Wendy | Posted: Mar 01, 2006 08:15:54 AM Heather, I have really enjoyed chatting with other people! I am glad you wrote. How are you doing with the waiting? Have you found things to pass the time? Do you have other children? Wendy | ||
| Heather | Posted: Feb 27, 2006 08:34:59 PM Hi! My husband and I are also on the waiting list to adopt. We have been waiting for about 3 1/2 months. I thought it might be nice to chat with other families that are waiting. Looking forward to joining the chat! | ||
| Wendy | Posted: Feb 27, 2006 02:53:38 PM SARA!!!!! I just noticed your wonderful news and am so super excited for you. That sure was fast! God must have thought you were patient enough. I cannot remember if you were the one that said God might decide to teach you patience or if that was Doris. Anyway, cannot wait to hear all about your miracle. Wendy | ||
| Heather B. | Posted: Feb 25, 2006 09:10:20 PM Hello everyone, Sean, Ryleigh, and I are just killing time until our profile is completed. Trying to stay busy and trying not to be consumed with antcipation. I am not a patient person when it comes to waiting for news about our adoption process. I hope the wait is going well for the rest of the gang. Hoping for a short wait for you all. Let ya know when we here something about our profile, I'll scream it from the rooftop when we're finally active :). Love, Heather B. | ||
| Doris | Posted: Feb 16, 2006 02:29:36 PM Hey Wendy, great minds must think alike. Ha!ha! I really liked the spelling Alayna but I couldn't convince Brandon. I like your idea of letting the birthmom contribute to the middle name. I am so happy to hear that Heather has a son. I am sure she is enjoying it, even the fussy times. | ||
| Wendy | Posted: Feb 15, 2006 06:08:01 PM Doris, I cannot believe that you like the name Elena! I have always really liked that name. I have had a heard time winning my hubby over though. I was going to spell it Alana and the middle name was going be Marie. I then came acrossed the name Ashlyn and he likes that better, but Alana is still definitely in the back of my mind. How strange is that?? We are thinking Carson James for a boy. James is my Dad's first name. We also liked Connor and Eli (Grand-father's name). I guess time will tell. It is hard to know how long the wait will be and whether we will find something we like better when it actually happens. I also wanted to be open to a middle or second middle name that the birthmom might have chosen. The Heather that started this topic did get her baby. It was an amazing story, but they we placed with their homestudy agency. They remembered them and called them with a specific situtation. She has a son and he has been a precious, but fussy little boy. They are doing great though! Wendy | ||
| Doris | Posted: Feb 15, 2006 12:36:09 PM Hey everyone! I love the names so far. It is so funny, Brandon and I both came up with the same boy's name before we even got married. It is Ryan Curtis. A girl's name was a little harder for us to agree on. We did finally agree on Elena Marie (or Elaina, unsure of how we want to spell it yet). The middle names are Brandon's and mine. Has anyone heard from the Heather who started this topic? I wasn't sure if I missed that she had been matched or not. | ||
| Jenn | Posted: Feb 15, 2006 11:58:09 AM Amy, to answer your question about names ... we've still got a list for both boys and girls. We like Allison, Hanna, and Haley for girl names and we like Braden, Cameron, and Hayden for boys names. We're still tossing around a few others too so the final pick will be TOUGH! Heather, I like your boy name -- we had tossed around Garrett at one point but my husband wound up taking it off our list. As for new matches ... I wish there was a way to see those. It would be nice to have 3 categories of profiles on the site: waiting, matched, and successful adoption. I wonder how many of the families on the website are actually matched right now. | ||
