We initially came to adoption as many people do, after years of unsuccessful attempts to have a biological child. Through those years, we had to think long and hard about the decision to be parents. What we always came back to was how happy our own childhoods were, and how much we wanted to nurture a new generation and share our family traditions with children of our own. In 2012 we were overjoyed to become parents to our daughter Annabel. Her birth parents matched with us one week before she was born (!) and we were fortunate to be able to get down to their Texas home in time for Annabel’s birth. It was an exciting time, and we spent a month in Texas before returning to Chicago, which gave us an opportunity to get to know one another and build the foundation of our relationship. And now we would love to add another child to our family.
Openness is a big part of how we think about adoption. We believe that for a healthy and strong sense of self, every child has a right to know who they are and where they come from. If you choose us to raise your child, we will always share a connection with you in that child. We would talk with love and pride about your decision to make an adoption plan, and would share as much as we can with your child about his or her biological family. Our hope is to know you and share the child’s life with you, to whatever degree you are comfortable. At the very least, we will regularly send letters and pictures so that you can see your child and the person he or she is becoming. If, as we all get to know each other better, you’d like to have more contact, we are very open to figuring that out with you. We will always use your child’s needs to help guide us.
Our daily lives are busy and full. Neal works as an IT program manager and helps solve people’s technology problems. Martha is a clinical psychologist who helps people solve all kinds of other problems. Both of our jobs offer a lot of flexibility that has come in handy as parents. Neal cares for Annabel in the evenings that Martha works and takes Annabel to music class on the weekends. Martha’s private practice gives her the freedom to make her own schedule, which has allowed her ample time to be home with Annabel during the day. We also share our home with our two cats, Gracie and Lola. They are friendly and mischievous little fuzzballs who never met a sparkly ball they didn’t like.
We understand, and imagine that you do too, that life doesn’t always happen the way we plan. In grade school, Neal was certain he’d be drafted by the Cincinnati Reds right out of high school. He had to rethink that plan when didn’t make his high school baseball team. Yet, later in life, he fell in love with running, trained hard, and became an Ironman triathlete. Yes, dreams change, and that can be painful. But life can still be wonderful in ways no one could have expected. We hope to be able to create something just as unexpectedly wonderful with you through adoption.Sincerely,
Neal and Martha
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