We have been together over five years and married for almost four. We knew pretty quickly that we were made for each other and haven't looked back. Somehow, after these five years of partnership and work and house renovations and the sleep-deprivation of child-raising we still find each other so likeable and hilarious and we never stop having things to talk about. Our confidence in each other and love for each other grows with each passing day and every obstacle and adventure we meet together.
We have a three-year-old daughter who we love to pieces. She's energetic, affectionate, curious, observant, stubborn, tough, independent, and so funny. The other day she told us that she needs to buy extra patience in case she loses hers, or it gets wet. She's also an extraordinarily considerate little person, and clearly a care-taker. If she hears anyone say "ow" she drops everything and comes running to see if she can help. It is a BIG deal for her that she can do buttons and zippers and put her shoes on by herself, and she tells us that if we get to have a new baby she will do all of those things for him or her. We warned her that it will be a long time before a new baby can help her with things too and she says that's fine, that she'll put on the baby's shoes AND her own shoes.
Kirsten was adopted and that's been an important and positive part of her identity. It has always been her dream to continue to create family through adoption, as hers was created for her. When we found out, a few years after we had our daughter, that having another child on our own would be impossible, adoption was the natural choice for us. We've always wanted a larger family; we want our house to be full and noisy and for our kids to have another person around with whom they can share the experience of growing up. We also can't get enough of the magical parts of parenting ?" seeing what the little creature you live with is going to do next, say next, notice; finding out what they think is hysterical, what ideas they'll come up with, what things about us they'll find objectionable ... we'd love to be there to watch and help another tiny person grow into the person they're meant to be, to include that person in our adventures, and to explore the world with them. We made a promise to each other before getting married that we will, as soon as our kids become old enough to remember, take a year off work and travel together as a family. We're so excited to make that happen but we want to wait until our family is complete.
The decisions you're working through require super-human resilience and courage. We can only imagine how you must feel as you make this difficult and very personal decision, but we so admire your strength as you go through this tough process and decide what's right for you. It is a great leap of faith to let others care for a child you've brought into this world. We promise you that, should you choose adoption and continue to consider us as adoptive parents for your child, we will live up to and be worthy of your trust. We also promise that we will love your child without condition, without holding back, and forever. You can be confident that your child will be loved hard not only by us but also by all of our extended family and friends. We will always practice open communication with you, impart to this child the immense love you have for him or her, and ensure that he or she is proud of their history and adoption story. You can count on us to share updates and photos with you and to maintain a relationship with you that you feel comfortable with.
We will always be grateful to you for helping us grow our family and for introducing us to the next love of our lives.
Allen and Kirsten
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