Why I Should Feel Good About My Decision to Adopt

When faced with an unplanned pregnancy, a woman experiences many emotions. Not only are you faced with the sheer shock of finding out that you are now a "we," but you find yourself face-to-face with what may seem like impossible choices to make.

Parent? Adoption? Abortion?

Compounding this are the expectations and opinions that society, as well as boyfriends, husbands, friends or family, can - and will - place on you.

Some may say that it is the mother's duty to raise the baby, that it is your responsibility; some may disconnect themselves from the thought of the baby as a person, saying that abortion would be the simplest, easiest option to address the "problem."

Others may place guilt on you by saying that placing a baby for adoption somehow makes you a bad mother. That you are, in essence, "giving up" your baby.

In reality, choosing adoption is the purest form of motherly love.

Whether it was planned or unplanned, only a woman who has experienced the reality of staring down at a positive pregnancy test can attest to the flood of emotions and shock that quickly follows. Only a pregnant woman can attest to the bond she immediately forms with this new, unknown person inside of her.

For whatever reason, thousands of women each year choose adoption. Whether it is for financial, personal or deeply private reasons, the choice is yours to make. When stuck at a crossroads between feeling a mother's love for her unborn child and the finality of abortion, adoption is the perfect choice.

Placing a baby for adoption is a "win-win-win" situation. It does not make you choose between what is best for yourself vs. the life of your baby, and it allows you to place the baby into the arms of an adoptive family that has hoped for nothing more in life than to raise a child.

While people can be mean and hateful about options other than parenting, adoption isn't about what others think or feel about adoption - it's about what you believe is best for your baby.

Through adoption, your baby will have the life you imagine for them, no matter what that may be - including a father who is loving and supportive and has the time, energy and desire to spend with their son or daughter; a mother who is emotionally and financially ready to be a mom; and all the love, support and education your child could ever hope for. Your baby will also grow up knowing their biological parents loved them enough to give them an opportunity at a better life.

Not only will you be giving your child the opportunity for a better life, you will be placing your child with a couple that has spent months and even years longing to be parents, who will center their lives around being the best mom and dad - and who will spend the rest of their lives eternally grateful for the gift you have given them.

Remembering that adoption is about the love you have for your child will help you shut out the hateful cries of others who truly don't understand how much you love and care for your baby. Adoption shows your child how much love you truly have for them - that you love them enough to give them a better life. Choosing adoption isn't the choice of a "bad mother," it is the choice of a loving mother.