Deciding between abortion or adoption

The choice is yours to make.

Abortion is fast and painless. Abortion is a clean break. No one will have to even know I was pregnant if I have an abortion early enough.

Life doesn't begin until birth, anyway, right?

Kandace was scheduled for an abortion the very next morning when she spoke with a girlfriend from high school she hadn't heard from in many years. Today, Kandace says she sees her friend as a guardian angel who came in just the knick of time to save her baby's life.

"It was crazy, surreal - almost everyone around me was trying to convince me to have an abortion … that it would be best for my baby, considering my situation," Kandace recalls.

As a freshman in college, Kandace was lucky to have her parents helping her with all of her school and living expenses, but that all changed when she broke the news to her parents.

"They were completely furious with me and disappointed, and if I didn't have an abortion, I was cut off from them for the rest of my life," she says. "I know I was 18 and technically an adult, but who can afford to pay for college without going into lifelong debt these days?"

Kandace felt she had no other choice, and reluctantly scheduled an appointment for the procedure. The night before, her phone rang. It was a girl that had transferred from her high school sophomore year, who she hadn't heard from since.

"As soon as I heard her voice, I just started pouring my heart out to her - it was nice to be able to talk to someone who didn't feel like they were somehow directly connected," Kandace recalls. "I was just waiting for her to do the same thing everyone else did, but instead, she asked me if I had considered calling an adoption agency, which I seriously hadn't even thought about."

In the wake of an unplanned pregnancy, emotions, fear and insecurity often abound. It is normal, in such a state of vulnerability, to hope for a solution that is simple, fast and conclusive, but the reality of abortion is far from this.

While nearly 70 percent of Americans believe abortion should be legal, as a constitutional right, more than three-quarters of us also believe abortion is morally wrong. Unless drawing on statistics from pro-abortion organizations such as Planned Parenthood, more than half of woman who have had an abortion experience severe depression within four years of the procedure. Nearly all experience ongoing or recurrent bouts with depression, many of which require counseling.

"When I called American Adoptions, I learned so much about the way they do adoption that I had no idea about," Kandace says.

Because contemporary adoption differs so greatly from the way it was done 20 - even 10 - years ago, many women are not equipped with the proper understanding and knowledge to make the most educated decision about the best alternative to parenting.

Adoption costs the birth mother nothing. She is giving the greatest gift she will ever give - life - not only to her baby, but to a family who wants nothing more than a baby to love and care for, forever. Medical expenses are covered, and in many cases, living expenses are, as well. An adoptive family does not choose your baby, you choose your baby's family.

Unlike the way adoption was done years ago, when a mother placed her baby for adoption, never to see or hear from the adoptive family again, American Adoptions believes the birth mother and family should arrive at a level of communication with which they both feel comfortable. If a birth mother hopes for personal contact with her child, she may seek an adoptive couple that has the same philosophy.

"At first, when I told my parents that I believed adoption was the best choice for my baby, they disagreed completely," Kandace says. "It wasn't until I presented them with the same information I had learned through my own research that they began to understand."

Kandace was even accepted into American Adoptions' scholarship program, so her parents had assistance in funding her education, which she is scheduled to complete in May 2009.

"If it weren't for that one phone call out-of-the-blue, I probably would have gone on as planned - by having an abortion," Kandace says. "I am more thankful than words could ever convey that I chose adoption, instead … she really was my baby's guardian angel - when you grow a life inside of you, you know life begins far sooner than birth."