Mother’s Day is a celebration of the sacrifices that mothers make for their families every day.
However, for some families, they would not be able to celebrate Mother’s Day without the biggest sacrifice of all: the one that a birth mother made for their family.
Every Saturday before Mother’s Day is celebrated as Birth Mother’s Day. While it is not as largely publicized or well known, it is a very important day for those who are positively affected by adoption.
Most birth mothers are unaware that there is a day especially for them. Many are appreciative, but some would rather not be recognized, as this day can evoke a wide range of emotions.
For those in a more open adoption, it is common to receive Birth Mother’s Day cards, emails or phone calls from the adoptive family. But for those in a closed adoption, this day can be difficult emotionally.
If this describes you, take this day to do some self-reflecting or journaling. Think about why you originally chose adoption, the wonderful life you provided for your child, and all of the happy parents, grandparents, brothers, sisters, aunt, uncles and cousins you created with your one selfless decision. While it can sometimes be difficult to remember all of the positives, understand that there is an entire family who thinks about you and loves you for what you’ve done for them.
We here at American Adoptions understand what you have gone through and why sometimes Birth Mother’s Day may not feel like a day for celebrating. If you need someone to talk to, call us at 1-800-ADOPTION to speak with one of our Adoption Specialists.
The following anonymously written poem has helped many women organize their emotions and the reasons they chose adoption:
Legacy of an Adopted Child
Once there were two women,
Who never knew each other.
One you do not remember,
The other you call Mother.
Two different lives,
Shaped to make you one.
One became your guiding star,
The other became your sun.
The first one gave you life,
And the second taught you to live it.
The first gave you a need for love,
The second was there to give it.
One gave you a nationality,
The other gave you a name.
One gave you a talent,
The other gave you aim.
One gave you emotions,
The other calmed your fears.
One saw your first sweet smile,
The other dried your tears.
One sought for you a home that she could not provide,
The other prayed for a child and her hope was not denied.
And now you ask me through your tears,
The age old question, unanswered through the years.
Heredity or environment,
Which are you a product of?
Neither my darling, Neither;
Just two different kinds of love.
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