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Patrick & Kathleen
We are so grateful that you are considering us as potential parents for your child. We are excited to build our family, make new memories, and provide this child every possible opportunity in life. We have so much love to give and will do anything and everything for them! We are so thankful to be starting on this journey.
Our Leisure Time
We love to travel to new places and explore new cities with our favorite being New Orleans! Experiencing a city on foot is one of our favorite things to do, walking around soaking in its culture and history.
We also like spending time outside together no matter what we are doing. We love to go on walks and hikes with our dog Polly and we are lucky to have several great city and state parks close to our house. Kathleen's parents' house is on a lake so we like to take out their kayaks during nice weather.
Patrick loves basketball and some of his best memories of his dad are either playing or watching games together, whether NBA or college. He was a pretty good player through high school and still enjoys shooting on the hoop in our driveway whenever he can. He coached a middle school rec team in the past and has had a lot of fun seeing some of our friends' kids play for the first time recently.
Kathleen loves being active and enjoys starting out each morning going for a walk in our neighborhood with her mom. She also loves to complete DIY projects around our house which have included redoing the kitchen cabinets/backsplash, painting, and customizing our furniture. She shares this interest with her dad so they have even completed a couple of projects together!
Qualities We Admire in Each Other
Kathleen About Patrick: Pat is really thoughtful and compassionate. He loves finding the perfect present for someone that he knows they will love or planning a game with friends that will be really fun for everyone. He is good at making people feel loved and cared about which will make him such a great dad.
Patrick About Kathleen: Kathleen has a love and passion for doing what is right. She is selfless, putting our family first every day. She has an amazing sense of humor and is always willing to be silly together. She enjoys spending time with her family who have been such an important part of our lives. She is strong and I know she will do anything for our child.
Together: We love that we share the same beliefs, describing ourselves as Progressive Christians, who believe that no one should be discriminated against and that everyone should be treated with kindness/provided the same opportunities regardless of their race, gender identity, or sexual orientation. We enjoy that we are on the same page when it comes to the importance of giving time and money towards helping causes that fight against inequalities.
We believe that helping our child develop their identity is the most important thing we will do as parents.
If our child is a different race than we are, helping them embrace their racial and cultural background will be an intentional and ongoing role that we are prepared to take on. We have friends of all different races, ethnicities and backgrounds and our child's heritage will be embraced and represented within our daily life.
We are happy to live in a city that is less than 50% white so we know that our child will always have a neighbor, a teacher, a coach, a doctor, and friends that look like them.
It is important to us that our child always understands their background, so we plan to champion their heritage right away through books, music, movies, toys, friends and community members.
We know that this will be a lifelong road for us as white parents and definitely not always easy, but we will never stop learning about what it means to be a culturally diverse family.
Our House and Neighborhood
We live in a vibrant, beautiful city in North Carolina. The local school system is one of the best in the state and North Carolina has many of the top colleges and universities in the country. Go Tar Heels!
Our city is very diverse with people of all races and ethnicities, religions, and backgrounds. There are parks, playgrounds, museums, street fairs, music festivals, sporting events, performing arts theaters, holiday traditions, and historic sites.
Our neighborhood has its own park and playground area with a swing set, swimming pool, tennis court, grills, picnic tables, and a small lake which has a new set of baby ducklings every Spring. Our house is located right across the street from this space so we get to spend time there every day. It hosts an annual Easter Egg hunt, Santa visits around Christmas, and an ice cream truck for summer pool days.
We have lived in our house for 10 years and it has 4 bedrooms, is surrounded by mature trees, and our yard is always filled with wildlife including our favorites: cardinals, hummingbirds, and chipmunks.
Our Extended Families
We live a few miles from where we both grew up and are blessed to have most of our family and friends nearby or within a short drive. Kathleen's parents live in the same neighborhood as we do and are such an important part of our lives. Kathleen begins each day walking with her mom and our dog, Polly. Her dad recently retired after being a family doctor for over 30 years. We celebrate every birthday together which always involves her mom's chocolate cake. Kathleen's brother and his wife live a couple of hours away on a large piece of land where they run their floral design/blueberry farm business.
Pat's mom and brother both live about an hour away. We enjoy visiting them around the holidays especially because Pat's mom decorates every inch of her house and absolutely loves to host.
This child will be the first grandchild on either side of our family and so our parents could not be any more excited to spend time with them at every opportunity.
We are lucky to have a lot of long-term friends that we consider family, some of whom are nearby while others live in different parts of the world. We take at least one trip every year where we all stay together in the same house, play games, and cook our favorite meals.
From Us to You
Thank you for taking the time to look at our profile and letting us share a little bit about our lives. We cannot imagine the difficult choices you are facing right now and what a struggle it must be to figure out the right path. By describing our life and relationship, we hope to give you a sense of who we are and what kind of parents we could be.
We first met each other in 8th grade and quickly became good friends. We were really each other's best friend all during high school but our relationship did not develop into more than that until after our first year in college when we started dating. Since we already knew each other so well, our relationship was pretty serious from the beginning and we got engaged after two years of dating and got married the spring we graduated from college. We were very young when we got married, 21 and 22, and have been together for almost 13 years since then. We really feel like we have gotten to grow into adults together and evolve into better partners and people during that time. Thankfully, we feel like we have become (and are still becoming) more empathetic, mindful, socially aware, and compassionate people during our marriage.
Adoption is an idea we talked about even before we got married, thinking of it as a special way to grow our family. When we found out a few years ago that Patrick has a genetic predisposition to certain types of cancer that requires that he takes a few preventative measures and perhaps that a biological child would have to as well, we were even more sure that pursuing adoption was the right decision for us. We feel ready to become parents and to provide a safe, stable, and nurturing home for a child. Our relationship after so many years is very strong, our finances are solid, and we are full of unconditional love that we are happy to have the chance to pour into a child. Over the years we have learned that family can look all different ways and is quite often who you choose to surround yourself with. We are fortunate to be close with both of our families and are blessed to have many friends that we think of as family. A child would be surrounded with so many devoted "uncles" and "aunts!"
We would be so grateful to be able to develop a relationship with you and be a part of each other's' lives. We are excited to share texts, photos, videos, and letters with you so you can see how loved and happy your child is. And we would love for the child to have the opportunity to know you and have an understanding and appreciation for their background and heritage. Again, family can look many different ways and we look forward to growing ours in this way.
Thank for you considering us as you make these tough decisions. We hope that we can make you feel supported and cared for as you navigate through this journey.
Patrick & Kathleen