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Peter & Becky
We can't thank you enough for considering us to parent your child. We know in our bones that we are meant to be parents and have a lifetime of unconditional love for any child we are lucky enough to find. Adoption is a choice that we made together years ago because it simply feels right and we could not be more excited to start this journey.
As a couple, we enjoy a wide variety of pastimes. Our #1 hobby is definitely food- we absolutely love cooking, baking, or sampling some fun new dish at a restaurant. A perfect Sunday usually involves Becky rummaging around in the fridge to put a pot of soup on the stove and Peter rustling up a loaf of sourdough bread. It's very easy to see a little one right there with us with flour on their face "helping" Mommy and Daddy.
We also love to travel- we most recently went to Bali, Indonesia for our honeymoon and had a spectacular time scuba diving, eating local food (suckling pig and peanut sauce fried noodles were a fave, but the fresh fruit was also amazing), and meeting some monkeys up close and personal.
We also try and incorporate fitness and the outdoors into our everyday life. Becky runs and does spin classes and Peter fences and bikes. Together, we love to hike and camp and are lucky to live in a spectacular region in the country with plenty of mountains and water and trees to keep anyone hungry to explore more. Closer to home, we also garden both flowers (lavender, daisies, lilacs, etc) and vegetables (kale, tomatoes, herbs, squash, strawberries) which would be a great kiddo activity.
Adoption will never be a secret or source of embarrassment in our family- we are so proud and grateful that this is the way we will get to start our family. We believe that this is meant to be so much that while we know it would likely be difficult to conceive, we've never officially gone through testing because adoption just clicked. There is not a shadow of a doubt in our minds that we have the capacity to love any child as our own and that we would be lucky to be a Mom and Dad.
Because of this, it will be very easy for us to be extremely open with our child and we plan to discuss this with them early and often. We've already started getting recommendations on good children's books that model adoptive families and brainstorming how we can surround them with other examples to normalize their experience and make sure they feel accepted and loved. As they get older, of course feelings may get slightly more complicated but we believe that as long as we provide a consistent and loving environment to work through those feelings, then the child will ultimately own their identity and feel positively towards their family history. And of course, we are very open to having continued communication with you in whatever way makes you most comfortable.
Our Family Traditions
Family is at the core of who we are and we have lots of traditions that fill up our annual calendar. Most summers growing up, Becky's family would go visit extended relatives in the Midwest and spend a few weeks on the lake shore running through the woods, water skiing, swimming, catching walleye for dinner, playing endless rounds of hearts with root beer floats, and boiling huge ears of corn from a roadside stand. Peter's family would often travel to the east coast- clamming, fishing, playing stickball, and spending long sandy days at the beach.
Christmas is another tradition-heavy time; both families spend days cooking up enough food for an army with menus that rarely vary (tamales, crab, cookies, cranberry cake, homemade chex mix, eggnog). We usually exchange one present on Christmas Eve (always PJs) and Christmas we hole up with all the leftovers and watch all of the extended Lord of the Rings. We can't wait to add little ones into the mix.
Our Extended Families
Peter has a large, blended family since his parents divorced including his father, mother, step-mother, sister, half-sister, and two step sisters. He is especially proud of a legacy of giving back as his Dad is active on a community board of health and his step-mother volunteers full time at the local food bank. Favorite traditions include faithfully viewing the NHL finals each year with his mother and a yearly trek to the zoo (no matter how old we get)!
Family is core to Becky's identity from a very close relationship with her parents and two sisters. Favorite adventures include following a dog sled race in the snows of Alaska, week long sea-kayak trips, or summers with extended family at our lake cabins spent swimming, fishing, and roasting the perfect hot dog in the Midwest. However, time closer to home is equally meaningful. We make a point to spend at least one weekend a month at our parent's house a few hours away, whether it is for an all-day cook out or launching the boat for some fresh prawns or crab. More than obligatory relatives, they are some of her best friends.
All parents, siblings, and siblings-in-law are within a few hour distance and all are perfectly supportive of our adoption plan and will accept a child as their own, just as we will.
Our House and Neighborhood
We live in a wonderful neighborhood with a great balance of charm and diversity. We bought a Tudor style home built in 1929 and updated the kitchen with brand new amenities to support our cooking addictions. :) We love the space and already have plans to convert our guest room to the nursery just outside of the master bedroom. We can easily imagine rocking the baby while looking out at the towering rhododendrons in our back yard, which has lots of room for kiddos to run around and play. Upstairs, the former owners converted an attic to a media area and there is the sweetest nook by a keyhole window that they filled with a miniature armchair and binoculars for a little hide out. We've always kept it ready for our future little explorer to play in.
There is also a beautiful lake about 5 minutes away which has running trails, play structures, and a fabulous wading pool where Peter's mother took him when he was a baby and we can't wait to continue the tradition. Peter loves to hand out Halloween candy and we were thrilled to see crowds of adorable trick-or-treaters last fall. There are lots of families nearby, and since we're local we have a large network of family and friends at a similar stage in life and so anticipate plenty of buddies to surround our little one.
From Us to You
It's overwhelming to think of you actually reading this letter and taking the time to learn about who we are. First, thank you so much for even considering us to parent your child. We can't really imagine the entirety of what you're facing and while we have not met you, it speaks volumes that you would consider such a difficult decision in an effort to put the needs of your child first. Regardless of what path unfolds, we sincerely hope you are able to find a healthy, loving, and peaceful situation for both yourself and your child. We are rooting for you.
To introduce ourselves, Peter and Becky, we met online and caught each-other's eye due to shared passions for homemade bread, cookies, and costume dramas. Our relationship quickly developed into something remarkable and actually, talking about our openness to adoption was one of the first conversations that transitioned us from dating into seriously preparing for a future together. We moved in, got engaged in the jungle in Belize, bought a house in the suburbs of the Pacific NW, and got married 3 years after we initially met. We took a year to settle into our marriage (and update our 1929 kitchen with some 21st century amenities) and now could not be more ready to welcome a baby into our home and hearts.
At this point, we've crafted a life that supports a little one in a variety of ways and we are very fortunate. We both have stable jobs in the tech industry (Peter as a Data Analyst and Becky as an Account Manager) with flexible teams that are supportive of us becoming parents and creating a balanced family life. Both of us grew up locally so we're lucky to have an incredible network of family nearby (5 future grandparents, 7 future aunts/uncles) and friends ready and waiting to love a child as much as we will. One of the future grandmothers has even started knitting a blanket. Put simply, we've got all the makings of a family but just need the baby.
This is the part of our future plans and dreams that we see most clearly. We see little hands smeared with chocolate helping to make cookies. We see late night feedings and reading "Goodnight Moon." We see soccer games and dance recitals and math homework and first dates. We see the beautiful, strong, loving people they will grow up to be. Neither of us have ever questioned that we would unreservedly adore any child as our own that we're lucky enough to meet through this process. We truly believe that family is made up of much more than DNA and that birth is certainly not the only way to become a Mommy or Daddy.
If you feel in your bones that we are the right parents to entrust with this amazing gift, we want to establish a lasting relationship with you. Of course, we are happy to provide regular photographs, updates, and stay in communication as often as you wish. In the early years, we're happy to coordinate a visit and after, can leave visitation as an option if/when the child is up for it. Above all else, we want an open dialogue and to come to an arrangement that is comfortable for everyone. We sincerely wish you every good thought and comfort as you navigate this time in your life and if you choose to move forward, we want to know how we can best support you and ensure the well-being and happiness of your child.
With love and hope and gratitude,
Peter & Becky
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