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Charlie & Meg
We recognize the magnitude of this decision for you and we applaud your courage and strength in considering adoption for your child. We, along with our daughter and family, are excited to grow our family through adoption. Thank you for looking at our profile and getting to know us better. We look forward to traveling this road together.
Why We Chose Adoption
When we got married, we hoped to have kids right away but after a year of trying, we were diagnosed with an infertility issue. We were fortunate enough to use some simple treatments to have our daughter, Penny. We wanted to try again right away and expected to run into the same issues. This time, our infertility struggles had worsened. We used more invasive and difficult measures to conceive our son, who we carried until his heart stopped in our 5th month of pregnancy. After that, we miscarried two more times. With Penny being 3, she felt the loss of her brother tremendously and noticed the lack of a sibling in her life. We have always planned to have a house full of kids so we turned to adoption as a way to grow our family. We have talked about adoption for many years after someone very close to us struggled with infertility. We recognize adoption is a difficult journey for all involved but we plan to provide your child with a healthy, happy home full of opportunities and love, provide you with a sense of comfort and peace and provide our hearts with one more child to love and raise.
Our Favorite Vacation Spot
Every year, our extended family vacations in Cape Cod, Massachusetts. Meg's parents, sisters and their families get one house for a week and spend quality time together. We start the morning on the beach and we play on the sand bar at low tide for a few hours. Then we head to the pond for the afternoon and we swim and float while the kids catch tadpoles. The family is so large we take up a huge section of the beach and the kids have fun playing with all of their aunts and uncles and cousins. In the evening, we cook dinner together and sit around and talk about the day and settle in for the night with a fun kid's movie. Trips to the candy store, the gift shop, the local market, ice cream on the pier and gazing at the sunset are part of the week's fun. The family favorite is our trip to Provincetown to go on a whale watch. We get to see so many humpback whales breach out of the water, wave their fins and splash around. The kids love yelling "Whale Tail" each time they see a tail pop out of the water. It's a tradition that Meg has been fortunate enough to experience for all 30 of her years and we plan to continue it with our kids for as long as we can.
We plan to address racial and cultural diversity in several ways, all of which have been informed by the wisdom of those who have shared their experiences growing up in transracial homes. We plan to choose music, books and art that represent the culture of the child and the diversity of our home. We already have a diverse set of friends and family, so we'll make sure that those people are present in our child's most comfortable place — our home — to reinforce that people of all races and backgrounds are important to us. In terms of building a community outside of our home, we'll seek out opportunities for our child to become acquainted with cultural or ethnic group activities, such as churches or camps. We'll also participate in those activities because our child needs to know we value the cultural associations he or she is building. Most importantly, we'll always remember to view our world through the child's eyes to serve his or her best interests. To say we'll be color-blind is disingenuous — our promise, however, is that we will always be color-aware.
Our House and Neighborhood
We live in a quiet Massachusetts town south of Boston, and our home is located at the top of a dead-end road. There are only ten houses on the short road, but there are 12 children from ages 3-14 living on the block. We've become friends with each home's parents — in particular our next door neighbors, who have become very close friends — meaning impromptu backyard parties with any number of kids is quite common. We have a fenced-in yard and a large swingset, so the parents on the block usually herd the kids toward our end, which we love. In the summer, we head the other direction for our neighbor's above-ground pool.
The next door neighbors have two toddlers Penny's age who are her best friends — and the neighbors have grown to become very close friends of ours, too. The neighboring town's fire captain lives across the street, which always gives us a sense of security.
Our home is an updated three-bedroom, three-bathroom colonial originally built in 1900. Only the central staircase divides the open-concept first floor, while each bedroom is on the second floor and the entire third-floor has a large playroom with a slide, projector screen and ball pit.
We are less than a mile from a 136-acre park with multiple playgrounds, a mini-zoo, ball fields and two hiking trails. We also love taking part in the two annual town parades, touch-a-truck day, the summer town fair and visiting our neighbor at the firehouse.
Our Extended Families
We know the value of having family close by; so much so that we moved across the country to be near our "village." Every member of Meg's large family lives within an hour of us. Most important, Meg's sister, brother-in-law and two nephews live a mile away, while her parents are in the next town. This allows us to have a true family dinner every Friday night, where all nine of us share our "rose and thorn" of the week and watch the children build forts, host dance parties and play hide-and-seek.
We see the rest of Meg's family at least twice per month, whether to gather for a birthday party, support one of their charitable causes or even just to lend a helping hand. About 20 of us get together each year on an autumn Saturday to help an aunt and uncle get their firewood stacked up for the winter after it gets delivered. At "Wood Moving Day," we eat and listen to music between tractor rides, meaning this chore has been turned into tradition.
While Charlie's clan is smaller, we still are able to travel to other parts of the country to see his parents and visit with his sister. We also use FaceTime and regular phone calls to keep connected.
Our family is racially diverse, as well as respectful of all different religious and political beliefs. Most of all, they are extremely supportive and excited about adding another member of the family through adoption.
From Us to You
We are excited to share more about ourselves, but we feel it's best to begin this note where this story begins: With you. Adoption may be complex and challenging for all involved, but a birth parent is presented with a situation requiring uncommon strength. We admire your decision, we respect your reason, and we will honor your trust from this day forward by giving this child everything you both deserve.
A child deserves to be hugged tight but also given room to grow, and a mother deserves to watch it all happen. We're committed to sending you photographs, videos and emails to be certain you see it. While we don't yet know your vision for the future, we're open to additional phone calls or possibly other communication, too. No matter how that unfolds, we can assure you that we will openly and respectfully tell our child all about his or her biological parents.
In addition to these promises, we'd like to share a little about ourselves as parents and our 3-year-old daughter, Penny, so that you can envision what life will be like for this child.
We believe that in parenting, love is always the most important thing - but we know it's not the only thing. We'll be committed to education, a family-first mindset and appreciating diversity: racial, socioeconomic, religious and political. This child will be empowered to voice their own beliefs and to always be considerate of others. While we won't knock down life's obstacles just to clear an easy path, we'll teach our children how to handle life's challenges - and we'll always be ready to protect them. Through it all, in moments big and small, this child will never doubt that they are loved, that they are special and that they have support.
As for our daughter, Penny could not be more excited to be a big sister. She's anxiously awaiting the arrival of a new baby and asks lots of great questions about adoption. Penny has even graciously invited the baby to stay in her room - instead of the nursery in the next room - so that she can "get up in the middle of the night to hold the baby." This baby will also come home to a gentle sweetheart of a dog named Duncan, who used to love us the most until Penny came along.
We'll make certain Penny and this child have the opportunity to see Disneyland as kiddos and pop band concerts as teenagers. We'll also connect them to their hometown with fireworks in the park, the rubber duck races in the creek and whale watches off the coast. Holidays will be memorable, too - especially Christmas, when "Santa" (played by Charlie or Uncle Brian) visits the 20-guest Christmas Eve party we host every year and the next morning, we wake up to presents under the tree and the smell of cinnamon buns in the oven.
But the moments that mean the most to us as parents will be when we're home snuggled on the couch, or watching this child grow up on bikes in the summer and sleds in the winter. We envision childhood being always surrounded by an older sister, learning experiences, unforgettable memories and, above all else, love.
There is so, so much more that we wish we could tell you in a letter. We hope to be able to show you in a lifetime instead. Thank you for reading this and considering us!
Charlie & Meg
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