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Mike & Alex
We think of adoption as an opportunity. It is an opportunity to be able to become parents, share love with a child and grow our family. Thank you for taking the time to read this and considering our family to become connected to yours. It gives us hope and joy to think about becoming parents and we hope to share some of who we are with you as you make your decision.
Our Family Dream
In a way it's hard to believe but it feels like adoption chose us. Alex has a rare chromosomal disorder that makes it impossible for her to have children of her own. We did try to have children through using an egg donor and it was not successful. In hindsight it feels like that was not really supposed to be our path. We talked at the beginning of our relationship about the fact that difficulty in having children was going to be a part of Alex's life. Mike made the conscious decision after giving it careful thought that he was ok with whatever the future held so long as we were together. Neither of us have ever questioned that we wanted to be or would become parents. We took time to enjoy being married before moving on to this new chapter we now feel ready to start.
There are many words that come to mind when we think about raising a child — kindness, confidence, grace, and love among the most important. It is so important to us that our child is kind to others and humble in life. We want to help celebrate the strengths they have and are excited to see those develop as they grow. It doesn't matter what they are interested in or good at as far as we are concerned, but we want them to find something they care about and go for it. Our hope is that they will always feel so loved and know that we have enough love in our hearts for any relationship that develops between them, us as a family and their biological family. This will hopefully come about through the years as we are steadfast in our support of them and always there to encourage them.
Our Leisure Time
Some of our favorite things to do together are hiking, visiting and exploring new places, eating great food and making our house a home.
We do a lot of things together as a married couple because spending quality time together is really fun and important to us. If it is a nice day we are usually trying to do something outside, whether it's enjoying our porch or going on a hike around the reservoir/lake right near our house.
There are plenty of places and things to do nearby and we love just going somewhere to try a new restaurant or see a museum. We are always up for getting out of our immediate surroundings. We usually end up looking at each other and saying "It feels like we are on vacation, and we are only an hour from our house!"
We like to take time to just relax and have down time to be at home and with our cat too, she makes us very happy just by being around and watching her funny antics.
Our Family Traditions
We LOVE holidays. Christmas time has always been special for both of us and as Christians we consider it and Easter very special days. Growing up, our families had customs of cooking special foods like pot roast and most importantly making time to all be together. We want to shower our child with experiences and time to be together. To us it's the little things like a card or hanging up ornaments that we have collected; or driving around to look at Christmas lights that make certain holidays so special. Those times are what we enjoy the most now in our marriage.
Birthdays are also a big deal and always will be to Alex and she thinks of it as a day to celebrate that person.
We want to create new traditions as a family like going on trips together or having time together like a weekly game night. We're excited to see these traditions take shape over time.
Our House and Neighborhood
We love where we live so much! There are lots of kids who play on our street and we hope to get to know those families better as our own family grows.
Our home has four bedrooms and we bought this house with a family in mind. We have a kitchen that opens to the family room so we can be together, which was an important item for us when house hunting. We also have plenty of room for a play room in the finished basement. We have a screened-in porch that backs to woods that is our favorite place to sit and relax whenever we can. Our cat, Opal, loves it out there, too! Mike was really keen on finding a nice backyard also so he could teach our children how to play soccer one day.
Our house is within walking distance to a lake where we can go kayaking and hiking on a pretty day.
We are lucky to be able to have a lot going on right within reach of where we live. We like getting to go to restaurants or festivals going on depending on the time of year. One of our favorite things is going to Christmas markets during the holidays — it's always a fun time and we cannot wait to share it with a child!
Our Extended Families
Our extended families are responsible for the adults we have become. There are three sisters between us with their own families. Alex feels her sister is one of the most important people in her life and can't imagine doing too much without her parents at least knowing about it.
Mike is the spitting image of his dad and they enjoy helping each other with all kinds of things. We are fortunate to be able to have close relationships with them and be able to see them often.
On holidays we make an effort to be able to see each other often, sometimes having "double" Thanksgivings or other parties if both sides of our families can't come over at the same time.
Most of Alex's family lives in Nebraska since her parents moved to Washington D.C. when they were married in the 1970's. Mike's family is also from the Midwest. When we talk to them about adoption they are the biggest support we have and they hope to welcome our future family with open arms.
From Us to You
Thank you so much for reading this and making what we know is a difficult decision to consider adoption. You would be giving us the greatest gift in life and for that we are humbled, grateful and excited. The decision you are making is a tremendous one and one that will connect us for life. We are a couple committed to building a positive relationship both with you and our future children. We cannot promise exactly what the future will hold of course but what we do know is that we will always show love and affection for our child. We will always speak honestly and openly about how you were their first parent. We want to explain that we know you loved them, but you made the choice that it would be best for us to become their parents and take care of them. It is so important to us that they know they are the most important thing in our lives and that we will always be there for them. We want to raise them in a fun and loving home and have so many things we want to share together as a family.
We hope to have a good relationship with our child's biological family in the future. We understand that what that relationship looks like is going to take time to develop. We are sensitive that there are times when there may be an ebb and a flow, years where we are more or less in touch and that all is to be expected and OK with us. We are committed to being flexible and caring towards our child's first family. We hope that our child grows up always knowing that there was a mom and a dad that loved them who made a choice that they wanted us to take care of them and that we would be good parents. There are things that they will feel and learn just from being able to look in their biological parents' eyes and being able to meet and know their relatives, and for that reason openness and support are important to us.
We spent the beginning years of our marriage taking time to build what we think is a solid foundation together and we are so confident that we are going to be able to handle the stresses and ups and downs that parenting brings. We have that confidence because of how we have weathered difficult situations in life already. We were able to grow closer as a unit over the fact that it was a difficult and unpredictable journey to get to this point of adoption. Looking back now, we know that this feels like the right decision and really it wasn't supposed to be any other way. Our hope and prayer is that you will feel that way about the choice you are making.
We are so ready to share all of the joys of parenthood and become a family with children and feel like we are ready to focus on the needs of our child and put them first. We are ready to give more of ourselves and parenting will be the greatest joy of our lives. It is not lost on us that this is probably a very uncertain time in your life and there will be feelings of loss on your part. Know that you are always going to be in our hearts and prayers and we hope you know that it should never be a question if the child you place with us will be loved and cared for. We are two incredibly patient and easy going people who will approach the adoption process with grace and gratitude. It would be ideal and so amazing if a friendship could grow between us. That is something that we can try to build together and we are so thankful for you considering us and hopefully choosing us to go through this process with.
Mike & Alex
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