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Heather & Elizabeth
We are so excited to have the opportunity to adopt another child and create the family we have always hoped for. We are very grateful for you and believe that considering adoption is an incredible act of kindness and bravery. Thank you for thinking of us. We can't wait to grow our family and are happy to answer any questions you have as we begin this journey together.
Adoption in Our Lives
We both come from large families and have multiple cousins who were adopted, so from that experience and adopting our daughter, Cophene, we know first-hand what an incredible gift this child will be for our family.
Elizabeth is extremely close to her cousins – as a child, she went to the hospital with her aunt and uncle to bring each of them home, and when she was old enough, she had the fun (and hard work) of being their nanny each summer. Heather remembers meeting one of her adopted cousins when she was just two-weeks old. The whole family had made plans to celebrate her grandmother’s 70th birthday in Disney World. Evidently, Ashley didn’t want to miss out! Heather’s aunt and uncle got a call that Ashley was ready and waiting early, so she got to spend her first moments with the family roaming around the Magic Kingdom.
While we’re a big and happy family, we recognize the importance of celebrating each child’s adoption journey. It has been incredibly helpful to watch how our families supported each cousin learning about where they came from. Recognizing our children’s adoption story and helping them understand how they came to be such an amazing part of our family is important to us and we believe will be important for them as well.
Our Life Priorities
We try to make life as exciting and meaningful as we can – in our home life, our work, and everything in between. Before we met and when we were both younger and getting out of college, traveling the world was a priority. We both worked multiple jobs to save our pennies to get us to interesting places from the beaches of Greece to the mountains of Laos to see what else is out there.
As we’ve gotten older, our focus has moved from traveling about to creating a home that can be the center of our lives, where our family and friends love to spend time. It’s important to us that we have a safe, comfortable, and happy home to live in and raise children--a home that is filled with laughter, lots of game-playing and good cooking. A place where we can snuggle in front of the fire with our kids reading books, and work in the garden trying to grow our own vegetables – not as easy as we thought when we started.
The people we love are the most important part of our life, especially our daughter. But whether they’re near or far, connections we have with our families and close friends are what really fulfills us. Bringing your child into this life we have created would be an incredible privilege.
We absolutely feel like our dogs, Finn and Gherkin, and little cat, Tippy, are part of our family. They each have their own unique personality, their own way of making us laugh, and their own way of getting into trouble. We have endless love for our pets and care for them with all the verve one would expect to give to a child. They all get tons of attention and playtime, sometimes with their neighborhood pals coming to run around the back yard and sometimes from our family coming to visit.
Our dogs traveled with us for the birth of the daughter, Cophene, whom we adopted in 2018 and it’s been amazing to see the relationship they’ve all developed. She squeals when she sees them (including the cat) and eagerly includes them in her activities, whether it’s “reading” books to them or feeding them at mealtimes. She’s started to accompany Elizabeth to the barn and she is taking to horses just as quickly as dogs and cats. We know that like our extended families, our band of furry family members would love to have a new addition to our family.
Our Extended Families
We come from very large, loving families and have always wanted to have a family of our own with multiple kids. Each of our extended families from grandparents, to aunts and uncles, and cousins adore our daughter, Cophene, and would love to welcome another child into all of our lives.
Our families play games non-stop when we see them, whether it’s over the holidays, hot cocoa in-hand, or during a beach vacation in summer after the sun has set. Perhaps the only family activity more important than games is cooking. We grew up surrounded by our extended families having gatherings all the time – Heather’s family had cookouts where it seemed like the whole town was invited, and Elizabeth’s close knit aunts, uncles and cousins put on regular feasts celebrating birthdays and holidays.
Beyond our families, we have an extraordinary set of friends that feel like they’re family too. We know how lucky we are to have such support from our families and friends. It will be incredible to bring another child into our lives and see them thrive from the attention, generosity, and love from the people around us.
Our House and Neighborhood
We are very fortunate to live in one of the most diverse, dynamic, and interesting cities in the world. Beyond the politics you hear about on TV and social media, Washington is just like any other major metropolitan area – filled with interesting people from all around the world, amazing restaurants, museums, and a community of families raising their kids in what happens to be a well-known place.
Our neighborhood is like a small town within a big city. There are lots of families with kids of all ages who live near us, which makes our neighborhood playgrounds, parks and pool lively. The main square is just a short walk from our house, and it has everything we need, including a pet store where Finn and Gherkin insist we visit often. We are only a few blocks from an incredible national park with trails that we use regularly. It’s a close knit community, with a lot of advocacy focused on family well-being and making our small ‘town’ a safe and supportive environment for kids to thrive.
Our home is much the same -- welcoming, cozy and with a lot of friends and family around. We have a big backyard that has seen a good deal of kid playtime over the years, a deck that is perfect for grilling, and a big kitchen that we love to cook in. It’s a great place to call home for our family.
From Us to You
Never in our lives has a letter seemed to carry as much weight as this one. Though we have no way to know who you are or what you’re going through right now, one thing seems very certain to us: that your decision to consider placing your child for adoption is an act of immeasurable love and bravery. And we are so grateful for that.
Like so many people we have wanted to have children for a long while, yet had been unable to do so until we adopted our daughter, Cophene. We wish you could see how excited we are and how much love and affection fills our house. Since that’s not possible, we hope we can convey a small measure of our love, admiration and excitement to you through this note.
Put simply, we would relish the opportunity to bring your child into our family. We have enjoyed becoming parents even more than we could have anticipated. And though we know every child is different, we want to raise children in much the same way we were raised: by loving parents who always made sure that we were their first priority, made us feel secure and tried to help us grow into compassionate, kind adults who contribute meaningfully to the people and community around them. Security, love and our commitment to helping him or her grow into being an independent, happy adult?"those are the most important things we believe we have to give to a child.
We have been together for more than 13 years and finally married in 2011. We began trying to become pregnant soon after. After five years of unsuccessful fertility treatments, still excited to become parents, we decided to adopt. Adoption feels like a natural way for us to create a family, partially because we have so many members of our family who have been adopted and partially because, as a gay couple, we always knew there would be more challenges for us in building a family than for some. Growing up in that community you have the gift of knowing that there are many different ways to create a family.
Just like our daughter, this child will have lots of grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, as well as a whole bunch of family friends to celebrate their addition to our family and their growth and development along the way. We both grew up with family birthday parties, trips to favorite vacation spots, and other family traditions that we hope to share. Around the holidays, festivities are a big deal in our house. Elizabeth loves to cook, and Heather loves to decorate the house. Holidays mean time with friends and family, laughing, eating, and just enjoying time together - and we want to pass that on.
We are also eager to get to know you and build a relationship with you if you are interested in an open adoption. We will always honor how important you are to this child’s life and will keep you updated with photos, letters, and visits, if that is something you want. We keep in regular contact with Cophene's birth Mom and would really enjoy keeping in touch with you as well.
We feel incredibly lucky for the possibility of adding a child to our family, particularly because we are mindful that it hasn’t always been possible for families like ours. We are equally lucky to have an incredible group of family and friends to support us in raising our children. We cannot wait to welcome another child into our family.
Again, thank you. We hope your search finds the best possible placement for you and your child.
Heather & Elizabeth