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Michael & John
We have dreamed of being parents for many years and can't wait to grow our family. We can't imagine what must be going through your mind looking at all these profiles, but we want you to know that we will love and cherish your child, and we will do everything we can to give them an extraordinary life.
Our Leisure Time
As healthcare workers, we both spend much of our lives taking care of others; when not at work, we relish the sanctuary of our home. Caring for each other, our cats, and our house is a constant priority. We like to cook together, expanding our culinary expertise with new cuisines and recipes. Michael loves to grill everything from fish and vegetables to the Thanksgiving turkey. John enjoys tending to the flowers and plants around our yard. We each try to carve out time for physical fitness. We love observing the abundant wildlife that visits our yard, including the wide variety of birds feasting from our bird-feeder. We enjoy playing bocce together, whether in our yard or at the bocce court at the neighboring community park. Hosting friends and family in our home is also a great joy, sharing food and drink in our space with loved ones. We continue to enjoy traveling to locales both new and well-known to us; favorite destinations include Palm Springs, CA, Boston, Provincetown, MA, and Chicago. We are excited to evolve these pastimes to include our growing family, to share our joys with a child.
Our Family Traditions
Like every family, we have developed a set of traditions that continues to evolve over time. Most of our traditions are centered around holidays like Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter. For example, we gather on Christmas Eve at John's aunt and uncle's home, the same house his grandparents built in the 1950s. They serve a series of dinner courses over several hours, while the extended family catches up and celebrates. On a table nearby sit pictures of family members we have lost, and invariably conversation includes happy memories of them as well. Christmas morning, we exchange gifts, often with a special breakfast. John's sister Ann and her husband Anthony host Christmas day, complete with gift exchange and yet more amazing food. Thanksgiving has always been Michael's favorite holiday, and we have begun hosting our family's celebration in our home. Michael cooks the turkey on the grill, and the rest of us follow his directions for sides. This past November, we added to our tradition by getting married in our home on Thanksgiving ... and Michael still managed to grill the turkey perfectly! With a child, we would build new traditions, whether it be an annual trip to Kennywood (a local amusement park) or long-weekend trips to Lake Erie to swim and relax.
We understand that our white culture is only one of many in our country. We would welcome the opportunity to adopt a child from a different race or culture, while recognizing the additional responsibilities this would create. As white men, we can never replace a child's connection with her/his birth culture and race, and we think that connection is essential. We would share in the child's the education and exploration, seeking out avenues for him/her to find connection to this important element of identity. Regardless of the race of our child it would be our goal to make sure they are raised with an understanding that the world is full of diversity and it is to be celebrated.
Our goal is not to occupy the space for our child, but to give her/him support, resources, and eventually freedom to integrate this culture into his/her identity. As we live in a homogeneously white suburb, we will pursue options within the city of Pittsburgh as well as more distant destinations. Talks at community centers, visits to important sites or museums, sharing experiences with people who belong to other cultures: these are the sorts of activities we envision. We can also foresee a role for the birth parents with this, depending on the level of openness of adoption. We recognize cultural education is a gift that we alone cannot provide, but are excited about being part of that development for a child.
Our House and Neighborhood
In 2017, we purchased our house specifically because it will be a perfect home in which to grow our family. Located in a wooded suburb north of Pittsburgh, our house sits on a quiet cul-de-sac, perfect for kids on bikes or skateboards. With five bedrooms in the house, we have plenty of space for a growing family. As much as we love the inside of our home, the outside and yard truly bring us joy. Mature trees surround the generous yard, creating an oasis. A large deck and a fire pit draw us outside, to enjoy the serene beauty. We love hosting friends and their kids to play yard games, especially bocce. Our neighborhood is approximately twenty years old and is home to a range of family types, from young couples with school-aged children to retirees.
Beyond our backyard lies the township community park, covering over 100 acres, including sports fields, hiking trails, a small fishing pond, a new "splash pad" water park, and a Community Center. The Community Center houses a large gym and hosts seasonal events like movies in the park and community days with fireworks visible from our yard.
Our public school district is one of the best in the state, promising your child outstanding educational opportunities. Approximately 30 minutes away is Pittsburgh, with its great museums, zoo, cultural activities, and sporting events. John's mom and sister Ann live approximately 10 minutes away, making extended family accessible. Our home would be very welcoming for your child.
Our Extended Families
John grew up in Western Pennsylvania and most of his family live in the area. His mom, dad, and two sisters all live close by. This is the main reason we moved to Pittsburgh in 2017 – to be closer to his family. For years we would fly out every few months for birthdays and holidays, but now that we live here too we have enjoyed more regular involvement with John's family. We have even been granted the honor of hosting Thanksgiving, our favorite holiday.
Michael grew up in Southern California and that is where his family still lives. In 2019 they all came out to Pittsburgh for the combination of Thanksgiving and our wedding (referred to as Thankswedding) at our home. We decided to get married on Thanksgiving since it is our favorite holiday since Michael gets to cook for the people he loves.
John's family are big Pittsburgh sports fans and every year we like to go to football and hockey games together. Michael's family loves to travel, go on adventures, and eat exciting new foods. They love to visit new countries around the world.
Both families are very excited and supportive of us starting a family. They can't wait to meet our child and nurture their development.
From Us to You
When we first met in October 2008 in Boston, neither of us could have predicted we would be here today, writing to you for the honor of adopting your child. But in the many years since then, we have grown together through countless holidays, birthdays, graduations, family deaths, and simple everyday life.
As we developed a life together, we confirmed a passion for growing our family. In 2019, we decided to get married in our home, on Thanksgiving Day. While this ceremony was nontraditional, it matched our priorities - affirming our love and commitment, surrounded by our families, in the home we hope to soon share with your child.
Back when we met, Michael was working as a research assistant while earning his degree in psychology, and John was pushing through his medical fellowship in infectious diseases. Professionally, we have each continued to develop. Since we met, Michael returned to school for his RN, soon followed by his master's degree (nurse practitioner). John completed his fellowship, then spent four years as an attending physician at a Boston hospital.
While we loved living in Boston, in 2016 we jumped on an opportunity to move to the Pittsburgh area, to be closer to John's family. We recognized that our goal of beginning a family would be easier here, with their support. John started as medical director of infectious disease for a rural hospital system outside of Pittsburgh, a job he has continued to grow. Following his heart, Michael now works in palliative care, helping patients with terminal illnesses to manage their symptoms and to prioritize goals for their treatment. The move has increased ties with John's family. It has also provided us with the resources (financial and otherwise) needed to grow our family.
Over these years, our address has changed many times. We have adopted three cats. We have had amazing adventures together. We have created a home and have fortified family connections. And now we are ready to act on our love for children and start the great adventure or parenthood.
We believe the job of any parents is to prepare a child for the world. At a basic level, this includes providing the best educational opportunities, material comforts, and health. However, parenthood is much more than that. We feel strongly that raising a child to value compassion, diversity, and curiosity is essential. We want them to see that the world is a big, beautiful, complex place filled with unique experiences. We hope this approach will empower your child to find their passion and potential.
We recognize that there is a lot of prejudice and judgment in the world, and that being raised by a same-sex couple may cause unfair treatment. We will counter this by teaching your child about love and compassion, but also the importance of resilience and standing up for themselves.
We promise to love your child and give them every opportunity possible, including the chance to have a relationship and connection to you. We want them to know where they came from and why they might not look like us. You will forever hold a position of respect and gratitude in our family. We are happy to send emails, letters, photos and regular updates to you about how your child is doing. We hope to work with you to make visits possible as well. We will never be able to understand how you feel right now, but we want you to know we will do everything we can to help keep you connected with your child in the future.
We have faith that there is an amazing home out there for your child. We dream that it is ours, but even if not, we hope you find a family that feels perfect for you and your child. Thank you for considering us for the honor of adopting your child.
Michael & John
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