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Kyle & Danny
We are truly thankful that you are taking a moment to get to know us. We can't wait to become Dads! Our hope is to show you a glimpse of the home and life we will provide for your child: one full of support, stability, laughter, and most importantly unconditional love. Adoption will be a journey, one we look forward to taking together, one step at a time.
What It Means to Become Parents
To us, parenting is about helping a child to be the best version of themselves. We are excited to watch our child grow; celebrating the huge milestones like first words and steps, to graduations and having a family of their own. We are equally excited for all the small things that make up everyday life, from comforting them after a nightmare to ensuring their homework is done before bed.
Danny cannot wait to share his love of animals, with trips to the zoo to learn about wildlife and hikes that explore nature firsthand. He is also excited to use his crafting talents, drawing pictures or making school projects together (trying his best not to do the work for them), fostering a love of art and creation. Kyle looks forward to reading our child a bedtime story each night, just like his own dad did growing up. Kyle hopes to ignite their love of learning and curiosity about the world, helping with math homework and science experiments (also trying his best not to do the work for them).
There is a lot we can teach our child but also a lot we can learn from them. We can't wait to see what sparks their curiosity and their own unique personality. Whether it's a soccer game, a school play, or an academic decathlon, we will be their biggest cheerleaders. Our role is to provide a supportive environment that allows them to develop their natural gifts and pave their own path through life.
Our Leisure Time
Our leisure time is a balance between social time with friends or quiet time together. We love to entertain and our house is often the focal point for gatherings of friends and family. Summer is filled with barbecues in our backyard; sitting around the firepit roasting s'mores with friends, as their kids play in the yard or splash in the hot tub. Every Halloween we host a large costume party, bringing together all of our friends for a night of festive fun. Danny is known for his creative, handmade costumes; Kyle is not.
On a typical weeknight, we relax by cooking together. It is our time to reconnect and wind-down after work. Danny enjoys trying new crafts or home repairs, perfecting something he saw on Pinterest or HGTV. He already has lots of ideas for fun projects to do with our child. Kyle loves music, and will often play the saxophone during his free time. He is eager to teach our child how to play piano and bring them to their first concert. We enjoy quiet nights at home, popping a bag of popcorn (extra butter) with a cat or dog on a lap, and binge watching the newest Netflix series.
One thing Danny does weekly is volunteer through the Big Brothers Big Sisters program. He was matched to his 'Little Brother' Nolan six years ago, and has watched him grow from a feisty 6-year-old to the amazing pre-teen he is now. Their favorite activities together include rock climbing, tennis, and going to the library. Nolan is excited for us to adopt and to become a 'Big Brother' himself, especially to teach our child how to roller skate one day.
Living in a multicultural city we are immersed in racial and ethnic diversity throughout our daily lives. Both of us work in diverse workplaces, Kyle at a hospital, Danny at a youth-serving non-profit organization. We are surrounded by strong black and brown role models, from surgeons to CEOs. Diversity extends from our workplaces into our daily lives. From a trip to the grocery store to eating at a local restaurant, a child of any race will see themselves reflected throughout our community.
Growing up as gay men we understand adversity and have learned how to navigate life when feeling different than those around you, finding self-empowerment along the way. This feeling of being different will be true for any adopted child, and we will help them find empowerment in their own adoption story. If your child is of a different race than ourselves, we know that there will be unique challenges and will continue to educate ourselves on the real issues affecting minorities. We will rely on our friends and family of color to be support systems in helping address the challenges and realities that we don't experience ourselves. Our goal is to raise a child that feels deeply connected to their culture and racial-identity, while also being an advocate for all others.
Our House and Neighborhood
Our home is nestled in the heart of a large city on Lake Michigan in Wisconsin. We enjoy spending time on the beach or walking the many trails in various nearby parks. Numerous cultural festivals take place throughout the year that we enjoy attending. Our favorite is Mexican Fiesta, where we love sampling foods from local restaurants and watching traditional dances. Our neighborhood is diverse and welcoming, with a playground, park, and elementary school less than a block away. We know many young families in the area, and our child would have numerous opportunities to make lifelong friends. We love being walking distance to local shops, restaurants, theaters, and most importantly, our children's museum.
We live in a four-bedroom, single family home full of historic character. Our favorite tradition is decorating at Christmas time with garland and stockings while singing along to our favorite holiday songs. One of the best features of our home is the large fenced-in backyard where our dogs (and future child) can run around and play. We have two younger cats and two older dogs. The cats are looking forward to lots of baby snuggles, while the dogs can't wait to help clean up all the dropped baby food. They are great with our friends' kids and are looking forward to having a new human sibling of their own.
Our Extended Families
Though our families span coast to coast, they are an important part of our lives. Kyle's parents, Jim and Sondra, live a few hours away in Minnesota. Sondra loves interior design and always has a new project for her and Danny to work on, while Kyle and his dad sneak away for coffee and donuts. Kyle is close to his sister and her kids who live in California. A favorite memory was taking our niece and nephew sledding for the first time when they visited Wisconsin at Christmas. They are excited to have a new cousin to open presents with on Christmas morning!
Danny's parents, Steve and Sally, recently retired to Florida to enjoy the sunshine and to be closer to his brother, Andy. Danny's family is loud, boisterous, and always a good time. Steve loves to tell family stories (sometimes for the second or third time) and we always end up belly-laughing. Sally is the type of mom who constantly needs to feed you, even when you tell her you aren't hungry. They will be first-time grandparents, and like to remind Danny how close they live to Disney World, where they can't wait to take their first grandchild.
We are both lucky to be raised by caring families that have continually shown us love and support every step of the way. Everyone in our extended families is excited to welcome and love the newest family member!
From Us to You
We are so happy that you are taking a moment to get to know us. We can only imagine what you are going though and we understand this is a tough decision. It's difficult to convey ourselves in writing but we hope to show you a glimpse of the loving, supportive and stable home we will provide your child. As you get to know us, please know we are equally excited to get to know you as well.
We met when Kyle was home from graduate school, visiting his best friend over winter break. His friend happened to live one block away from Danny. We hit it off immediately and even though the first 10 months of our relationship were long distance, we knew we had something special. When Kyle graduated he took a job in Wisconsin and Danny quickly followed. After dating for 5 years, buying a home, and building a life together, we got married. We had our dream wedding on a warm beach in Punta Cana with 40 of our closest friends and family there to celebrate. We were blessed to have so much love and support, highlighted by having both our parents walk us down the sandy aisle.
We both enjoy great careers that we love. Kyle is an anesthetist at a local hospital. He has the tough job of ensuring a patient's comfort and safety during surgical procedures. Having surgery is often incredibly stressful and scary, but being able to ease the patients' fears and bring them safely through makes it all worth it. Danny oversees the volunteer program of a local youth-serving non-profit organization. The best part of his day is interacting with volunteers and kids, leading them through fun games and activities. He gets to put smiles on the faces of kids and volunteers alike and gets to end each day with high-5's and fist bumps all around. We are both incredibly lucky our careers make a direct positive impact on our local community.
Adoption was something we talked about early on in our relationship. Both of us have always wanted to be fathers (Danny plans on being "Dada," while Kyle "Papa"). We have loved our seven years together as a family of two (and our cats and dogs of course), but we are ready to add one more and make our family complete through adoption. We are excited to teach our child how to tie their shoes and ride a bicycle, to cheer them on when they are succeeding or cheer them up when they are feeling down. Parenthood will come with many ups and downs but we will do everything possible to give your child a happy and healthy home. We promise to help them overcome all of life's hurdles, be a lifelong advocate, and always love them unconditionally.
Openness in an adoption can be a difficult topic, one that we have thought about deeply. We would welcome you to be a part of our child's life and we hope to form a relationship with you as well. Your child will have two amazing Dads, and lots of strong female influences but there is room for you in our lives too. We would welcome visits with you and your friends/family. If you wish to only communicate via technology, we will send pictures and updates as much or as little as you prefer. But ultimately, we will respect your choice and privacy, and want you to feel comfortable with whatever level of openness feels right for you. This is a big decision, and we will do everything possible to support you and be conscientious of your needs.
This is the most important letter we have ever written and it is probably one of the most important decisions you will ever make. We think about you and where you are in your journey every day. We hope you have a little better understanding of who we are, our values and beliefs, the home we will provide, and the unconditional love we will have for your child. From the bottom of our hearts, thank you for taking the time to get to know us!
Kyle & Danny