We know that transracial adoption will expose us to a world we have never experienced. Our child is going to see the world through a very different lens than we do and we do not want them to feel isolated in that experience. We will support our son or daughter by making sure they understand where they come from. We will be sure to educate ourselves and listen to other perspectives, especially those of transracial families. We will also make sure that our son or daughter sees themselves represented in our home through pictures, decorations, and children’s books.

We have two neighbor kids that were adopted from Congo and are now in elementary school. One is a boy and the other is a girl, and we hope that they can be mentors to our adopted child as they grow up. Our families are very involved in each other’s lives, and it is our hope that this relationship will foster support for our child as they share their experiences with someone that looks like them.

We met in college. Adam was a sophomore and Mattie was a freshman. We attended a small Christian college, so everyone knew everyone. We first talked at a powderpuff football game in the fall of Mattie’s freshman year, but at that point we were just acquaintances.

Adam played baseball and Mattie played softball, and we shared a practice facility. We would see each other often, but did not really connect until we started hanging out through mutual friends. It all started with a game of “Apples to Apples” in the student union, which led to a movie date at the local theater. And now the rest is history!

Mattie About Adam: Adam is the most people-oriented person you will ever meet. He is always going out of his way to help others and make sure they are comfortable. This translates directly into his parenting. I always knew he would be the best Dad, and now that I have seen it in action, I can say he has met and exceeded my expectations. Our boys adore him; Daddy coming home from work is the highlight of our day. As soon as he walks into the house, he is dialed in and ready to be a Dad and husband. He makes sure the boys understand that Mom always comes first and that Mom and Dad are always a team. He loves fiercely and without restraint. The world needs more Dads like Adam!

Adam About Mattie: Mattie is the best. She is a loving, hard working momma/wife, who puts her all into everything she does. When I think of her the words solid and consistent come to mind. She always takes care of her boys (me included) and puts our needs above her own. She is the glue that keeps our family and our lives together. Mattie loves to play outside with me and the boys. She is always playing baseball, volleyball or going on walks and is very active and engaged. I appreciate her getting on the floor and reading to the boys or when she hides in the closet during hide and seek. She is always good for a funny movie quote and has a great sense of humor. Her character is unquestioned and she is the most genuine person I know.

Our neighborhood is one of the biggest blessings in our life. We live on a street that consists almost entirely of young families and members of our church. It is a little community all in itself, and we absolutely love it. We are actually one of the smaller families with only two children, and our boys are some of the youngest. The older kids on the street are great to our boys and love playing with them. We go outside every night after dinner to see who is out and about, and we play until bedtime.

Our house has 5 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms. One of the bedrooms is used as a playroom above the garage that holds all of our toys and winter fun! That is our favorite room in the house, but mostly we love being outside.

We love playing in the front yard and often other kids will join us. We have a reputation of being the "sports" house on the street because we have lots of sports equipments. The neighborhood kids love it, and we love having them!

Mattie's family all lives in the area. Her mom is able to watch our boys every Monday along with our niece and nephews. Our kids especially enjoy these days because they get to spend time with their cousins while Mom is at work. They are all very close in age and love playing together. Mattie's parents, sister and her family all attend the same church and often have lunch together after church on Sundays. Adam's family lives in the same state, but a few hours away.

Adam's mom drives up about twice a month to watch our boys while Mattie is at work in the morning. These days are very special for everyone since we don't get to see Adam's parents as much as we would like. Adam's sisters live across the country so we typically only see them on holidays.

When we do all get together, we love getting to see our kids spend time and play together. We hope that as our kids grow older, it will become easier and easier to go visit our family that lives out of state.

First of all, thank you. Thank you for choosing life for this baby and doing what you believe is best for your child. We cannot imagine the turmoil you must have been experiencing these past several months. Our love for our children is all-consuming which has led you to this decision. A decision that we do not take lightly, and we will make sure our child knows how much their birth parents loved them.

Our child will know from a very young age that their birth mom loved them so much and wants to know about their life. We will not claim to be his or her “only parents” because that is simply not the case. We may be raising them, but you brought them into this world, and we will be sure that our child knows where they come from. We will give our child all of the information that you want us to about their story. Where we come from is part of what shapes our identity and we want our child to be able to be confident in who they are. We will not tiptoe around the topic of adoption and birth parents because it is as much a part of our story as it is theirs. We will discuss their birth parents and the communication we have had with them. We will share letters, emails, pictures of special occasions, and other highlights of their life with you.

We have been married for almost seven years and have been on our parenthood journey for the last three. We have two sons, ages three and one, and we feel prepared to welcome another child into our home. We feel that we are gaining an extended family through adoption, and we are thankful that you are considering us to walk this journey with you. We know this is not just “our” adoption journey, but yours as well. The pain you must be feeling, we can truly only imagine. We pray that you will also feel hope through this adoption process. Hope for your child and hope for yourself. Although there is much brokenness in the world, there is also much goodness. We hope that we can raise all of our children to recognize this but choose to be the good. There is hope for you. There is hope for your baby.

You will not be forgotten. We will make sure our child remembers their roots and the greatest love possible that came from their birth parents. You are not “giving your child up.” You are not giving up on them, and neither will we. We will love them fiercely and do our best to raise them up in an environment that honors your decision.

We hope many things for this adoption journey. But most of all, we hope that you experience hope. We hope you don’t see this as an end, but as a beginning. The beginning of what we pray will be a beautiful story.

Adam & Mattie