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Kirsten & Danie
We believe that parenting is the most important role any person will face in their life. Thank you for considering us for this important decision. We are so excited to expand our family through adoption and to go through this journey with you. We know this a tough decision and hope that in learning about us, you will feel that we are the best choice for you and your child.
Our Favorite Vacation Spot
Travel is very important to us and is an essential part of our lives. To us, vacations should be relaxing but also hold some adventure. Because we live in a metropolitan area we generally like to go on trips that bring us away from city life. So far our favorite vacation spot is the coast of Maine. We were both drawn to Maine before we met and so we chose it as our honeymoon destination. Since our honeymoon trip, we have been back to Maine one other time. Because we have such a deep connection to Maine, it will forever be a place that continuously calls us back for future vacations. In particular, we love the smell of the ocean, the scenery, the relaxed vibe the coast provides, and going out on the ocean. We also especially like going on different hikes along the coast. One of our favorite spots is Jordan Pond in Acadia National Park. We can't wait to experience family vacations there. Danie in particular loves tide pooling and is excited about sharing that with a child.
What It Means to Become Parents
We feel that parenting will become an extension of who we are. It's seeing the world and our experiences through the eyes of a child. It's extremely important for us to be able to nurture a strong sense of self within a child to ensure that they feel connected to their cultural heritage. We want to help provide them with a strong moral compass so that they grow to be a kind and compassionate person. We value education. As parents it will be very important to us that education takes place both in and outside of a school building. We want to encourage creativity and provide opportunities for them to explore their interests to find their passions.
We believe that communication will be key in parenting. We believe that children's feelings, thoughts and expressions are valid and deserve to be heard. We want to make sure they are comfortable and confident in sharing their feelings and using their voice. It's important to us that we also learn with and from them. We have created a beautiful and loving life and home and are really looking forward to welcoming a child into our family.
Addressing Cultural Diversity
It has always been very important to us to seek out information about the experiences of others. This will play a large role in how we ensure that our child know and love who they are. As two white women that are open to adopting a child of any race, it is extremely important to us that they have a strong sense of who they are and where they came from. While we can't say for certain exactly what this is going to look like, we do know that teaching our child about cultural diversity will be an ever-present part of our daily lives. When we were growing up we had to really dig to find any sort of content that reflected who we are because there was little to no LGBT+ representation at that time. We understand that our experience with this is not the same as it would be for a child to not see their heritage reflected in their everyday lives, but it is similar in how it can make a child feel. For us, it made us feel like an "other" and like we didn't belong. This is a feeling that we want to make sure they never feel. Should we be matched with a child that is a race other than our own, we intend to participate in transracial adoption groups and events so that they will have a community of other kids that have the same, or similar, experience as them.
Our House and Neighborhood
We live in a suburb of a large city in Minnesota. Our house has four bedrooms, is a bit older, but holds lots of charm. Danie dedicates herself to maintaining the yard and works diligently every spring and summer to keep it beautiful. We have a finished basement that currently doesn't get much use but will make a great play room. We live very close to our town square where there is an annual community festival celebrating the town and its history culminating in a carnival and parade which the neighborhood kids really love. We also live close to our local children's museum and history museum, as well as venues for sporting and cultural events.
We are fortunate to live in a state that has a focus on the environment. We enjoy going on hikes in numerous state parks, and walks around our home at one of many well maintained trails. In our neighborhood there are several parks as well as a pool and splash pad which is a hit in the summer. In the winter there is a giant hill near our house that all the neighborhood kids love sledding down. At the bottom there is a skating rink which we hope to be able to teach a little one how to skate someday.
Our Extended Families
Danie is an only child and Kirsten has a younger sister. Danie's dad lives nearby and she is able to see him regularly, whether that be to give him a haircut or scope out new metal detecting locations that he enjoys. Danie and her mom share a mutual bond over their love of animals. Kirsten's family also lives nearby and her mom is so excited to become a grandma and create bonds with her future grandchildren. We are both close to Kirsten's family and especially enjoy traditions we have followed including holiday bake-offs, summer bonfires, and frequent family dinners. Kirsten's grandma is already a great-grandma to 3 and she can't wait to make it 4! We also consider our close friends extensions of our families. We're lucky to live close to most of them and also enjoy traveling to spend long weekends with our friends who live out of state. We have monthly game nights where we come together and have good food, lots of laughs and a ton of fun. In the summer our game nights expand to the yard with bonfires, yard games and s'mores. One of our close friends recently had her first child and we can't wait for future play dates!
From Us to You
Before we began to write the most important letter of our lives, we took a moment to breathe, ground ourselves, and tried to fathom how to put to words our sincere gratitude. Gratitude is something Danie and I have carried with us the entirety of our relationship: grateful to have found each other, grateful to have finally gotten the right to marry and now grateful to you for considering us as parents for your child.
Our story starts eight years ago when we met each other in person for the first time. Our lives changed forever over a cup of coffee. Since that day we've been inseparable - as cheesy as it sounds. Marriage for us was not yet a possibility in 2012, but we knew we'd be spending the rest of our lives together. Since then we've sewn our lives together: bought a house, traveled the U.S., got a dog, three cats, changed jobs and yes, finally married. Today, Danie works as a project manager and Kirsten is a social worker working with the elderly. We both enjoy a certain amount of flexibility in our careers which we will definitely take advantage of when it comes to childcare in the future! We always knew that we would have a child one day and that we'd have to get creative to make this dream come true since we are a same sex couple. At first, the intention was to grow our family through Kirsten becoming pregnant. After several unsuccessful attempts at conceiving, we made the decision to pursue adoption. After discussing what we saw in our future, we decided that we just want to be moms, and biology isn't an important factor in that decision. We can't wait to someday share our lives with a little one.
We are lucky to live in a diverse community near most of our friends and family. We like to have game nights with our friends and usually have them at least once a month. Dinners, game night and BBQ's are regular occurrence with our families as well. Everyone is looking forward to welcoming a little one into the mix to join in on the fun. As you may have read in other parts of our adoption profile, aside from spending time with family and friends, we also absolutely love traveling. That's one of the biggest things that we're looking forward to sharing with a child. We believe that these kinds of experiences are very important for children because it expands their understanding of all different types of people, places and communities. We can't wait to experience these adventures through their eyes.
This letter was honestly so hard for us to write because we are so grateful to you, and we weren't sure if there were words to adequately convey this to you. We want you to know that your child is, and will continue to be, so incredibly adored and loved. There will never be enough "Thank You's" in the world to give to you in return for making our dream come true, but we can try. The best way we would know how to do this is to raise your child with the knowledge that they are loved beyond measure. To raise them knowing who you are and maintaining a link with you throughout their life, if that is something you both desire. We will never hide the fact that another strong and determined woman made it possible for us to complete our family. We promise to never take the decision you have made for granted. We are humbled to even be considered as parents for your child and we wish you peace as you go through this journey.
Kirsten & Danie
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