“Little souls find their way to you whether they’re from your womb or someone else’s”
– Sheryl Crow
“Adoption is a journey of faith, from beginning to end.”
– Johnny Carr
“Families don’t have to match. You don’t have to look like someone else to love them.”
– Leigh Anne Tuohy (adoptive mother portrayed in The Blind Side)
“If you have a heart for adoption, don’t let fear stand in the way”
– Doug Chapman
Families who are hoping to adopt – especially if they’re adopting from another state – have undoubtedly heard talk of ICPC. But what exactly is it? Why is it important? And does it apply to your adoption?
Luckily, it’s easy to find out whether you need to worry about ICPC. It will only play a part in your adoption if you are adopting from a state other than the one where you live. If you’re adopting from out-of-state, though, gaining ICPC clearance is a crucial step.
When kids have tricky questions, I turn to others for advice, whether that be my friends, family, or the internet. When I search for “how to tell your child about ______,” I am often referred to storybooks. How brilliant! Storybook authors have made their living out of entertaining and speaking to children, so I often turn to them to explain what I cannot.
Adoption is one of those topics that are tricky for kids to understand sometimes. Why am I adopted? What does that mean? Why don’t I look like my parents? Here are some suggestions for books that help explain adoption to kids.
As the new school year rolls around, your child will be meeting new teachers, classmates, and friends. For adoptive families, this is a great opportunity think about adoption and how to talk about it with other people.
While you won’t be by your child’s side during the school day, there are plenty of things you can do at home to encourage his or her positive understanding of adoption. By creating a strong foundation of honesty and openness about adoption, you will be able to help your child talk about adoption with people at school.
Here in Kansas City, we are officially 2-3 weeks away from the start of school. So, while the stores have stocked their aisles with every school supply imaginable, they’ve also made sure the shelves are full of water bottles and sporting gear for the fall sport season. And with the Olympics about to begin in Rio, kids are going to be begging their parents for gymnastics/swimming/water polo/field hockey lessons, and all the gear that goes with it. The excitement has already started at our house.
I didn’t understand what I was going through at the time, but through research, counseling, and my healing path, I have realized something crucial: I have moved through the grief process when it comes from transitioning from having the role of a custodial parent to the role of being a birth mother.
As the new school year approaches parents scramble to prepare their children for what’s ahead. From buying pencils and paper, to backpacks and lunch boxes, to the coolest new outfits, they do everything they can to ensure their children are ready for a great year.
For adoptive parents, there is one more thing you can do to ensure your children flourish in the classroom: raise adoption awareness.
Since 1958, July 30 has been the International Day of Friendship for countries around the world. What better time to send a nice gesture to the birth parents in your life?
“Friendship” may not be a powerful enough word to describe your relationship to your child’s birth parents. You share something unique, cherished, and irreplaceable – your child – and that is a bond to be celebrated at any occasion. This year, take a moment to learn a little bit more about International Day of Friendship and how you can add to the fun.
Just as biological mothers can experience postpartum blues or depression, so too can adoptive moms (and dads).
There are so many emotions involved in becoming a parent, and for those who become parents nearly overnight, there can be the added stress of doing everything at the last minute. Coupled with sleep deprivation and complicated feelings of guilt associated with birth parents, it’s no wonder so many adoptive parents experience post adoption depression.
The good news is that you are not alone. There are thousands of adoptive parents out there coping with the same feelings you are. And even better, there is help available.