If you are an older couple hoping to adopt, you may have noticed that many adoption agencies have age requirements for families who work with them. What if you are above the upper age limits? Does that mean you are too old to adopt a child?
Very few states have laws that state a maximum age for adoptive parents. When it comes to finding adoptive parents for a child, the thing that matters most is the ability to provide a loving, nurturing, and safe home. Read on to learn about age requirements at adoption agencies and find out your other options
Why Are There Age Restrictions?
While age does not affect a parent’s ability to love their child, it can have an effect on wait times. Prospective birth mothers often choose to place their babies with younger parents, which means domestic infant adoption agencies cannot guarantee older families a reasonable wait. This is why American Adoptions typically works with hopeful parents between the ages of 25 and 50.
We set this upper age limit for the same reason we require our families to be open to semi-open adoption – because so few birth mothers seek out closed adoptions, finding a closed adoption opportunity could take years. However, your adoption dream is still well within reach.
What Can I Do?
Although some adoption professionals have upper age limits, you have plenty of other options to grow your family through adoption. If domestic infant adoption does not work for you, consider one of these alternatives:
- Foster care – State laws for foster parents don’t have maximum age limits, and foster parents will often be considered first if a child becomes available for adoption.
- International adoption – Many countries’ requirements for international adoption don’t have an absolute age limit, but an age limit in relation to the child’s age. Older couples often successfully adopt an older child abroad.
- Independent adoption – If you have identified a birth mother on your own, you will not need to meet the requirements of an agency. In fact, American Adoptions can help you through our Identified Adoption Program.
So if you’ve ever wondered if there’s such a thing as being too old to adopt, you can set that worry aside – by finding the path that works for your family, you can make your adoption dream a reality.
I would like to adopt. I have previously adopted two children international as infants, who are now 11 and 16. Adoptions have been pretty much closed for some time and years have past until they are reopening. I am a music teacher. I teach six days a week. I have my masters degree in music education. The problem I face however is that I am now 66 years old. I am healthy and active. I deal with about 35 private students each week plus classes. However…I am outside of the eligibility to adopt because of age. I love kids and want to be mom again.
Hi, Kathleen! Please call 1-800-ADOPTION to speak to an adoption specialist about our adoption requirements. While many domestic and international adoption agencies do have preferences about the age of adoptive parents, many foster care agencies do not have upper age limits. You might also call and ask your local child services department to ask about becoming a foster mom!
Best of luck to you, Kathleen!
We had a social worker tell us that our youngest foster child needed younger parents, because we might not be around when he got to middle age. She said the department is not saying that they would not allow older people to adopt, they are saying, please take a step back and think about the infant’s life long term and what he has the rightful expectations of during that life. Do children have the right to expect to have parents available to them until they are the older generation? Until they are in their 50’s to 60’s? It is a discussion we need to talk about and process through. There are no definite answers to these questions, but they are things we need to think about. Since when are healthy adults said to be too old to adopt? We are active, healthy, 60 year old, whose other children that we have adopted seem to keep us young.
I’m 68, my husband 70. In good health and active. Last year we put in for adoption with Social Services, they came out to the house and said this is the nicest house they’ve been in and went thru all our bills, and every inch of our house. We were passed by the FBI check. Went to 1 day of training but things came up and did not finish. Never once did any of them say we could not adopt because of our age.
I would like to adopt an Asian child that is 10 yrs old. She has been in a foster home since she was an infant. She has ADHD, which does not bother me as I had this going thru school. I wrote a letter to nighlight.org
I wrote a letter to https://www.nightlight.org/international-adoption/ and they wanted me to call them back. Which I did they told me we could not adopt her because of being 40 yrs older then her. Which Social Services never mentioned this to us last year.
She said well the parents have it in there agreement. I asked her if she could call them and she said NO. These parents don’t care obviously since she has been there for 10 yrs. This case worker could of cared less and just blew me off. We have a child here that needs a good home,love and learn how to grow and a place to call her own.
I contacted a local adoption attorney writing them a letter, to this date have not heard back.
I have tried getting a hold of people but no one seems to care or help.
So I’m asking for your help.
Please help if you can
She is on this site: https://www.nightlight.org/international-adoption/
But shows she is in Kentucky: https://adoptionbridge.org/waiting-children/whitney/
Hi, Debbie — American Adoptions only completes private domestic infant adoptions, so we cannot offer any help in your process to adopt. We would recommend you reach out to another local adoption attorney or work directly with your local Department of Social Services for help receiving this adoption placement or another available opportunity.
Hello – I am currently 51 and interested in adopting a child under the age of 1. Are there any circumstances where age can be reconsidered? Thank you.
Hi, Sherry — Please call 1-800-ADOPTION to speak to an adoption specialist about our adoption requirements. While we do set certain age limits, we have granted exceptions for our requirements based on a person’s individual circumstances.
Hello, my wife and I are in are late 40’s now with a six year old daughter and would like to adapt another child but wonderering where to start. The other hurdle we have is that we now reside in Sweden and I have heard it’s even harder to adapt a child here. If there is any information you could give in order to guide us in the right direction would be great. Thank you, Todd
Hi, Todd — Currently, our agency only completes domestic adoptions, with exceptions for two U.S. citizens living abroad on a military base or in U.S. territories or protectorates. One spouse must be employed by the U.S. military or government.
We encourage you to start by reaching out to local professionals to learn more about the process of adoption in your country. We are unfamiliar with adoption policies in Sweden, so we cannot provide more specific advice for your situation. However, local professionals would best be able to assess your individual situation.
I want to adopt a child overseas, is there an age limit for the child that i need to know about. I am thinking about the country INDIA.
Hi, Russell — It looks like there are some restrictions on age for people looking to adopt from India. Whether or not you meet age requirements will depend upon the age of the child you adopt. You can learn more about those restrictions here: https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/Intercountry-Adoption/Intercountry-Adoption-Country-Information/India.html
Here is an interesting one. I am 45,my husband is 28. We have been married for three years and early on we discussed adoption. Additionally we are of different races. We are slowly moving forward with the process (still in the information gathering stages), however with me being older than my husband and our ethnic differenceswe are wondering how that plays into decisions for agencies, especially if we are looking to adopt a biracial or African American child.
Hi, Kasey — For more information about our agency’s age requirements and our adoption programs, please call 1-800-ADOPTION!
Hi my name is Patti. I will be 62 in August & interested in being involved in foster care & or possibly adopting an older child.I
was adopted at 6months old and had extraordinary parents! Cld you tell me if I’m too old or is this a possibility. Thankyou
Hi, Patti — American Adoptions only completes private domestic infant adoptions. We encourage you to reach out to your local Department of Social Services or foster care agency to learn more about adopting an older child. Good luck!
My age is 30 my one old ladey is going to adopt me is this possible her age is 55
Hi, Satvinder — This is known as an adult adoption, and it is completely possible! You can learn more about the process here: https://consideringadoption.com/adopting/types-of-adoption/why-and-how-to-adopt-an-adult
Me and my husband both are 67 years old, we both came from the Philippines, now American citizens. We would like to adopt a 3 years old girl from the Philippines that the birth mother is willing to let us adopt this child. Where do I start? Is this going to be a lengthy process?
Hi, Merlyn — As a domestic adoption agency, we cannot help you complete the international adoption process. We encourage you to reach out to an American adoption agency that works in the Philippines for more information on this process. You can learn a bit more about what to expect here: https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/Intercountry-Adoption/Intercountry-Adoption-Country-Information/Philippines.html Best of luck!
Ok, I’m writing a story, and adoption is involved. The person who would be adopting is a widowed 55-65 year old, would that work out?
Hi, Jayden — While it’s unlikely that someone that age would adopt an infant through an agency like ours, they could always choose to adopt an older child through foster care or in a kinship adoption situation. Best of luck with your story!
My husband will be 39 this April and I am 42 and will be 43 this May. Would we be to old to adopt a young child? I don’t think it’s right to put age limit’s unless both of the parents are in there 60s. We know people that adopt there grand children and they are 50s and 60s? Anyways if you could get back to me or if anyone knows please leave let me know so we can go further with this we want to start this process in the next year. Thanks…
Hi, Kandice — There are typically different requirements for private domestic infant adoption (what our agency completes) and foster care adoption. For more information on our agency’s age requirements (which you do meet), please call our specialists at 1-800-ADOPTION. If you are interested in adopting from foster care, please contact your local Department of Social/Human Services. Thanks!
I am 54 yrs old and looking for a gestational carrier to carry a baby for me I have my own embryos am I to old to have a infant baby?
May 22, 2020 at 9:30p
Hi, Rita — We are an adoption agency, so we do not complete gestational surrogacies. You should contact our sister agency, American Surrogacy, who can answer this question. This article may help: https://www.americansurrogacy.com/blog/am-i-too-old-to-have-a-child-via-surrogacy/
Rita I have this same question. Locally our IVF will not assist in age over 42. Please let me know if you see successful & where.
I had my first child at 42 and my second at 45. The lady next to me in the hospital had her first set of twins at 56. So I’m not sure what all the hullabaloo is about. Have that baby! You are older and wiser!
I am 48 years old and want to be adopted by my friend. Am I told old to be adopted?
my friends are like family and they are in the 50s and it is important to be adopted
thanks
Hi, Bryan — You can certainly pursue an adult adoption at any age. Here’s some more information about it: https://consideringadoption.com/adopting/types-of-adoption/why-and-how-to-adopt-an-adult/ Good luck!
I find some of this amusing about age adoption. My mother had me at 43- I am 76 and have had a wonderful life! My youngest daughter is 32 and has a wonderful life with 5 children and I am having a wonderful time with them. In fact, yesterday we visited a country farm and it was was so much fun. Everybody after 40 is not so old and decrepit they can’t raise, train and enjoy children. I am still going strong. Adoption age should be according to ability age. In my family we live and are active until into our nineties.
I want to adoped girl under 16 for she have no mothe only father from Pakistan . i am 65 years old so i need healp
Hi, Farah — We are a domestic adoption agency that operates within the U.S., so we cannot offer any advice for your situation. We encourage you to reach out to a local adoption attorney for more information on adoption laws in your area. Good luck!
I am now 63. I lost my mom over 1 year ago.
I never had children and now would like
to consider adoption. Can this be a possibility?
Hi, Kathy-
Unfortunately, most private adoption agencies have requirements regarding age, for reasons that are outlined in the article above.
Most states do not have upper age limits to adopt from foster care, so we recommend contacting your state’s foster care department to learn more: https://www.adoptuskids.org/
I am 63 y old
Is it possible to adopt
at this age ?
I have energy and am
loving.
Hi, Kathy-
Unfortunately, most private adoption agencies have requirements regarding age, for reasons that are outlined in the article above.
Most states do not have upper age limits to adopt from foster care, so we recommend contacting your state’s foster care department to learn more: https://www.adoptuskids.org/
Im 63 divorced father of 3 grown children. When they was growing up i became involved with some of they’re friends that came from broken homes. Some called me dad, most of them were friends of my sons or my daughters boyfriends but i treated them as my own. 3 years ago at 60 i joined the big brother big sister program and was matched with an 11 year old who lost his adopted dad. He has a good hard working mom who has allowed him to treat him like my own. My relationship has been wonderful with him but at 14 he now spends alot more time with his friends and not so much with me which i knew would probably happen some day. We still have a good relationship and love him as much as my own kids. But i think i want to go in another direction now and maybe either go into fostering a child or adopt one. I still work and not ready to retire yet. Ive talked to my children and they’re supporting me with this idea. I feel i can give another child a good home and the life he deserves. I know it could be a challenge but i feel ive done a good job with my kids and my little brother. Can you give me some ideas on who to talk to. I live in southern Minnesota. Thank you
My husband is 54 and Im 52 and we want to adopt. We feel its our time! We now have a home we own and two very good jobs. No preference of gender or nationality. We would like 5 or younger.
Hi, Julia-
Please contact us at 1 (800) 236-7846 if you’re interested in domestic private infant adoptions. Thanks!
I am 51 yrs old and my husband is 43. We want to adopt but do NOT want an infant and do not want to engage in foster care at this time. Could you please provide us some guidance on where to go since you only handle infant adoptions?
Thank you so much and keep up your great work.
If you’d like to adopt an older child, your options are either to adopt from foster care, or to adopt an older child from another country. The second option may not be possible at this point in time, due to COVID restrictions. We’d recommend talking to your local foster care organization to see if they can help you adopt an older child rather than fostering him or her, or reach out to an international adoption agency for more information. Best of luck!
I want to know wether I can adopt my niece who is 35years old and also her son who is 6 years old, My husband and I are 68 and 69. they live in Nicaragua, we want to insure a better life for her and the child. living with us would be beneficial for them, the child has learning disabilities and my husband and I could make life better for them here in the US