Every birth mother has their reasons for wanting to give their child up for adoption. But one concern that sits in the back of many women’s minds when they’re deciding if adoption is right is, “Will I regret giving my baby up for adoption?”
No matter what, our adoption specialists can help you with any questions you have about adoption. They’re here to answer your questions and talk through the potential relationship between you, your child and the family you choose.
Contact us to speak with an adoption specialist today to learn more about the many benefits having an open adoption provides women like you.
Choosing a Semi-Open Adoption
It’s never a simple decision to choose adoption. Birth mother Erika had never considered herself to be someone who would go through adoption, but when she became pregnant at 35, she started considering adoption for her baby.
“I was always one of those people that was like, ‘Oh, I could never do adoption,’” Erika says. “I always believed those women were really strong, but I didn’t know how they did it. Not until I actually experienced it myself did I fully understand how hard it is. You have to have a great amount of love to place your child for adoption.”
Erika found that once she went through the adoptive family profiles, she found herself more at ease with her decision. Ultimately, once she found the right family, the choice became easier, leaving her without regret of giving baby up for adoption. However, Erika and her fiancé chose to have a semi-open adoption, getting updates from the adoptive family three times a year. This leaves the door open for her daughter to choose whether or not she would like to have a relationship with her one day but still allows her to know how her daughter is doing.
Erika also decided to keep her adoption a secret from her family members, including her children. While this is not the best option for every prospective birth mother, Erika thought it would be best for not only her family members but also her.
Choosing Adoption After Parenting
Everyone has a picture of what they think their future and parenthood will look like. However, circumstances don’t always give us that picture we imagined, and we have to change course. For birth mother Carmen, she became a mother before she had planned, quickly becoming a single mother. When she found herself pregnant again, she started to wonder how she would have the time, energy and resources to support herself along with two children. She wasn’t sure if adoption was right and if she would regret giving baby up for adoption in the long run.
“Through much thought, prayer, and the support of family and friends, I came to the immensely difficult decision to give my son up for adoption,” Carmen remembers. “I spent the next several weeks combing through what must have been dozens of wonderful families. Then, I found them — the couple that I immediately felt connected to.”
Carmen spent time getting to know Rob and Allie, who would ultimately become her son RJ’s parents. Carmen involved the couple as much as possible in her hospital plan, with Rob cutting the umbilical cord and Allie the first to hold the baby for skin-to-skin contact. Carmen left the hospital feeling a forever bond with the family, knowing it wasn’t goodbye. Today she continues to receive pictures and letters of RJ as he grows. Creating this relationship with Rob and Allie and having an open adoption allowed Carmen to feel confident in her future and without regret for giving her baby up for adoption.
Working With American Adoptions
If you’re still in the deciding stages of what feels right for you, that’s completely understandable. You need to do what’s right for you and your child, and no one knows better than you. Many birth mothers worry that they will regret giving up baby for adoption, but it’s important to cover the emotions involved in adoption if you want to pursue the process.
When you work with American Adoptions, our adoption specialists will help you through whatever you need. Contact us to learn more about what adoption is like, the benefits of adoption and more.