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BOARD: Topics of Interest for Adoptive Families » Other Topics for Adoptive Parents
TOPIC: Waiting Couples Chat
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| whitney | Posted: Jul 10, 2007 10:54:47 AM Hey Lisa! Kaitlin and I are doing well thanks! Too bad no news yet! It is hot here too, in the 90s every day and chances of t-storms every afternoon. We have a neighborhood pool, but Kaitlin does not like it much this year! I know your visit will go well. Our visit in person went so much better than expected and I am so glad we did it. It made it a little easier at the hospital since we had already met and talked. Any names picked out yet? Hope everyone else is doing well! Adrienne - is he here yet? | ||
| Lisa | Posted: Jul 10, 2007 08:17:13 AM Good Morning Ladies, I hope that everyone is doing well. We are amist a heat wave here in the North East. Definitely weather to be inside or at the beach. We have confirmed our visit with our birth mother for the first weekend in August. We are so excited! We are also very nervous. Hopefully everything will go smoothly and we will all continue to bond. She also has another OB apt. today. We may speak to her in the next couple of days to see how it went. I hope that everything goes well for her. She lives in Florida so hopefully she is taking it easy in the heat. Adrienne, Are you a mom yet? I hope so. Whitney, How are you doing? How is Kaitlin? Are you guys experiencing a heat wave down south? I hope that everyone has a great day!! | ||
| Lisa | Posted: Jul 05, 2007 12:58:14 PM Good Afternoon Ladies, Adrienne, I can't believe that your BM is 3 weeks overdue. It has to be any moment now. Hang in there. I can only imagine how stressed out you must be. Just remember that good things come to those who wait. You are almost there. Jenn & Whitney, Thank you both for all of your recommendations. They are wonderful!! I am definitely going to use the Dr. Brown's bottles and I am going to order the monitor. I also have to get a pack n play. I hope that everyone had a great 4th. It rained up here, but at least we didn't have to work. YEAH!!! | ||
| whitney | Posted: Jul 05, 2007 10:57:53 AM Adrienne - I expected your next post to be that your son had been born! I can't believe she is 3 weeks overdue! You know they will have to induce her soon! I have never heard of anyone going that long. I think you wil love the monitor! It made it easier to sleep at night. I also agree about the 4 oz. bottles. Kaitlin was eating 4 oz. a feeding by the time we came home! I think she cried a lot initially because she was hungry. The nurses said she was eating 2-2.5 oz a feeding, which was not enough! We used Dr. Browns because Kaitlin spit up alot and really liked them. We also used Advent and liked them really well. They have fewer parts. Hope all had a good 4th! Terry was working so Kaitlin and I had a day together! | ||
| Adrienne | Posted: Jul 05, 2007 08:54:33 AM Hi, hope everyone had a great 4th! It's always one of my favorite holidays. This year was a bit rough just waiting but it actually went good overall. Our bm has a doctor's appt today so we'll see what that brings. Tomorrow she will be 3 weeks overdue. Congrats Lisa on finding out it's a girl! How exciting, now you can buy pink and frills. Jenn and Whitney the advice on things to buy is great. I immediately purchased the monitors on ebay after your recommendations. Those kind of tips are sooo helpful for those of us who are becoming first time parents or even first time of going through the adoption process. Thanks! | ||
| Jenn | Posted: Jul 03, 2007 01:35:29 AM We also waited until afterward to have our shower. In fact, Hailey was almost 6 wks old before we had a "welcome home party" for her (in lieu of a shower). Although it was a little bit of a pain not having some things and not being able to just go buy them b/c we had registered for them, it was nice to wait a bit for the party. We were a little freaked out about germs and so many people holding her, so waiting until she was a little older made us feel better. The main reason we waited was we were hoping the BF's rights would be terminated before the party (just in case). It turned out that they weren't but thankfully everything worked out anyway. Much like Whitney, my parents bought us a pack-n-play and my MIL bought us our glider rocker. We had those plus we bought the essentials beforehand. We registered for mostly non-essentials (although the Diaper Champ and swing became "essentials" quick and we were itching to get those!). BTW, we've used nothing but Dr. Brown's bottles on the recommendation of a friend and I do think they're great. Whatever bottle brand you choose, I wouldn't waste money on 4oz bottles. We bought several of those and they only last a few weeks! Hailey has been drinking 5oz for awhile now so we had to move up to the 8oz bottles. There doesn't really seem to be a point to having the small bottles. Also, we initially thought we wanted a wipe warmer b/c babies of course hate the cold, but unless you plan on taking it with you to the hotel, there's not much point b/c by the time you get home, she'll be used to the cold wipes. Plus, you won't have it when you're out so she'd be that much more shocked then. Bathtub with infant sling -- a must! If you hate the idea of using a rectal thermometer, there is an awesome electronic temporal thermometer out there that is supposed to be just as accurate and it's instant. I'd never heard of it before but my MIL bought it for us and we love it. It works on adults too -- just a swipe across the forehead and voila! Sterilizer -- don't bother if you have a dishwasher at home. The microwave sterilizer bags are cheaper and should be sufficient for while you're away. Another must have -- blanket bags. We are still using ours b/c we keep the A/C on (thankfully they come in 0-9 mths). Just some things we've learned along the way. Have fun doing your registry!! | ||
| whitney | Posted: Jul 02, 2007 11:22:29 AM Thanks Lisa, I hope that this is our week, or at least our month to get the call. It was encouraging to learn we were recently picked, but the BF changed his mind about doing adoption. Have you all finished your nursery or thought of any names? You know, we registered before Kaitlin was born, but only because there was a shower planned for the week after we came home (We had 4 showers total). I did not want a shower before, just to be safe. However I had a lot of stuff beforehand anyway, some of which was essential. My mom's best friend gave us a crib and my parents got us the glider for Christmas and the stroller/car seat system. My inlaws bought us our pack-n-play. We bought enough bottles to get by and the changing table, and were fine with getting everything else afterwards. Oh yeah, we bought a few dresses and outfits ahead of time too and my sister gave me my niece's baby clothes. It is really up to you, your family may want to go ahead and help with big/essential items. | ||
| Lisa | Posted: Jul 02, 2007 10:24:16 AM Good Morning Ladies, Jenn, It is great to hear from you and see that you and Daymond are enjoying every minute of Hailey. You deserve it! Good things do come to those who wait!! I cannot wait to hold our little girl. We are in the process of trying to schedule a visit with our birth mother. Congratulations on the BF rights being terminated. That is wonderful news! Definitely a reason to celebrate. Thank you for the recommendation of the monitor. I will definitely put it on the list. My family is dying for me to register so that they can start planning a shower. Did anyone have a shower before the baby arrived? Whitney, I am glad that you had a good week and weekend. I am sure that the baby room looks adorable. I am praying that this is "your" week for "the call". Think positive thoughts. Have a great week everyone!!! | ||
| whitney | Posted: Jul 02, 2007 08:01:43 AM Good Monday morning to all! We had a nice week and weekend but I was so happy to get Kaitlin back yesterday! I missed her so much! We did put up chair rail in her room and the nursery and painted the bottom half of each room, so now only one thing is missing in the nursery!! Jenn, I will resend my email today hopefully! That is great about not having to worry about the BF anymore. I know you are relieved! I agree with the Angel Sound Monitor. We used it with Kaitlin and I felt better having it. We continued to use the monitor till it tore up after 2 years. I am going to invest in a new one with the next baby though because it is so nice to have! Lisa, NY sounds so nice to be so close to. My mom loves to visit there every 2 or 3 years. Jen, glad you are going to use the forum more. I do think sometimes the wait is longer if you already have a child, but you never know. That is so awesome about your little miracle. She is so cute! Hope everyone else has a great Monday morning and there is more good news this week! | ||
| Jenn | Posted: Jul 01, 2007 01:17:22 AM There is so much activity on the forum now, it's hard to keep up! Whitney, I noticed you mentioned having sent me an email on the 28th. Just wanted to let you know that I didn't receive it so please send it again (it might've been misdirected to my Bulk or Trash folder but now I'll know to look for it). I'm always happy to share pictures but we definitely need to update the ones on our Webshots page. We're of course always taking pictures but we've been slacking on uploading them to the website. We finally found out on Friday that our BF has officially defaulted. YEAH!!!! The rest is just a formality now. We're waiting for the BF termination papers to be processed and we have another appt with our social worker before they'll schedule our finalization. We will have to travel back to Maine, but that's okay b/c it's a lovely place to visit. We're hoping it will be in August or perhaps September. We're so relieved and thrilled now that all rights are terminated -- what a great feeling when it's official (well, practically official) that your new baby is really yours forever. We were playing with Hailey on the couch today and my husband made the comment that he's going to want 10 babies. He was joking of course but this is a guy who originally thought he wanted an only child. He finally came around to the idea of two not long before we started the adoption process. He is sooooo enamored with Hailey that I'm not sure two will be enough for him now. LOL It's so funny how babies truly do change absolutely everything. I have to admit though that we're both a little concerned that the next baby won't compare to Hailey -- we swear she's literally perfect.;) I hope all of you who are waiting get to ride the baby wave soon!! Lisa, definitely let us know when you come up with some names -- that is so much fun! I was just thinking today that I really like the name Katie. We didn't pick too many traditional names when we were brainstorming but that's a pretty "traditional" name that I like. Oh and you're going to LOVE having a girl! Just don't be fooled into thinking that she can't pee on you like boys do. We (as well as our floor, our changing table, etc.) have been peed on many times!! LOL One last thing that just came to my mind since you mentioned getting baby gifts ... I don't know whether I've ever mentioned this here before but the hands down BEST baby gift you can get, IMHO, is the Angel Care baby monitor. If I could only have one baby item, it would be that one. It is so much better than a visual or just sound monitor b/c it senses the baby's breathing. It has saved many lives b/c if the baby stops breathing, an alarm goes off. I'm not sure I'd be able to sleep without it -- we've used it from day one in the bassinet and now the crib. It's not too expensive either, and you can pick them up on Ebay too. | ||
| jen114 | Posted: Jun 29, 2007 03:09:32 PM Thank you all for your experiences, it's great to know we're not alone. We did make some changes to our APQ this week. I'm hoping that will help. Everyone sounds so wonderful on this chat and I will be more involved. Congrats on the matches and finding out it's a girl. That has to be so exciting. We currently have a 3 year, she was a twin we lost her sister at 6 days. We count our blessing every day we have her b/c she was born at 26 weeks. We went through fertility again for a year, but it didn't work. That's when we turned to adoption, so far we're really excited and just trying to keep busy. We live in Maryland. So if anyone is close to us I would love to chat more. | ||
| Lisa | Posted: Jun 29, 2007 10:07:05 AM Happy Belated Birthday to you too Nicole!! I never knew anyone that had the same b-day as me. Neat! I hope that you had a good day. Thank you for your well wishes. Next year your b-day is going to be great! I know it. I hope that everyone is having a great day and lots of plans for the weekend. We are going into NYC tonight for dinner with my sister and brother in law. I will speak with everyone on Monday morning. Take care!! | ||
| NicoleS1974 | Posted: Jun 28, 2007 10:29:41 PM Lisa! We have the same birthday! Mine is on the 27th too! Just thought that was ironic! What a great gift you got this year!! I know when everyone was asking me this year, what I wanted for my birthday, I kept saying "To be a mom, but since no one has that option in stores, we will take gift certificates for baby stuff!" So now we just wait and keep all of those gift cards in the drawer until time to baby shop! So much fun! *Got a STARBUCKS gift card too....it will be GREAT to start up my caffiene addiction again after over a year of not drinking coffee while trying to concieve! HOORAY!!!* Just wanted to pass on a little belated birthday wish to you! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! :) | ||
| whitney | Posted: Jun 28, 2007 11:02:13 AM Lisa, at one time we mentioned exchanging emails and Megan Spaeth (who also happenns to be our specialist) sent me Carol and Jenn's email address. That way we could keep in touch outside of the forum. I was slow though and just emailed them today for the 1st time. Wendy - we love the name Carson and if we get a boy, we may go with that. We like Claire for a girl. Lisa, we got a book of baby names and both made lists and narrowed it down from there. In discussing names, it was easier for us to come up with girls names than boys. | ||
| wendy | Posted: Jun 28, 2007 10:44:38 AM I would love to share pictures of Carson!! I will let Megan Spaeth know that it is okay to give out my email address. | ||
| Lisa | Posted: Jun 28, 2007 08:33:03 AM Good Morning Ladies, My b-day yesterday was truly the best ever!!! Instead of gifts for me, my family got me baby gifts. It was great! We have to start thinking about names now. Any suggestions?? We like traditional names. Congratulations Carol on finalizing Abby's adoption! That is definitely something to celebrate. I can't believe how big Abby is getting. Time definitely flies by! Kerri, Our adoption specialist is Christine Casey. She is awesome!! We love her!!! I wish that we were going to be closer to you in Florida. It would be great to meet. Adrienne, I hope that today is the day!! Enough is enough already. You want to meet your little boy!!! Is there a way where we can all exchange e-mail address'? I would love to be able to see pictures of the beautiful babies. Can AA help us? | ||
| whitney | Posted: Jun 28, 2007 08:07:16 AM Thanks for the well wishes Carol and good to hear from you. That is great you already finalized! Did you have to travel back to where Abby was born? We had to do 3 post placement visit and wait until Kaitlin was 6 months to finalize. We had to fly to Iowa in December for 10 minutes in court to finalize the adoption. Hope everyone else is well and has a great weekend. Kaitlin is with my family this week so we are getting some time together and getting a lot done around the house. I do hope we get the call soon. At one point there were 127 waiting families just a week or two ago and now there are 142! It is hard not to see that as more competition! I did find out there are about 10 couples who have been waiting as long as us, bt 2 are in matches. It is good that most get matched in less than that time, but I never thought we would be one of the few that took longer. | ||
| Carol | Posted: Jun 27, 2007 04:35:17 PM WOW!!! So much is going on lately and so many new people to the board!! I just had to share our news that our adoption was FINALIZED on Monday, June 25th!!! For those of you who are not familiar with me, we waited for 10 months with AA, matched on March 1st, had our baby girl, Abby, on March 17th, and now it is all done and final!! Abby is doing great!! She is now 3-1/2 months old and growing so fast before our eyes. She is chewing her fists, sleeping all night, grinning, laughing, etc. We are having such a wonderful time with her. Whitney-I truely hope that your call will come soon!!! Please do email me...I don't have your email address. I will email you some new pics of Abby and our finalization. Adrienne - your bm must be about to POP so it just has to be anyday now for you!! Lisa - Congratulations on a little girl!!! Hope that all of you get phone calls soon!!! We reside in Kentucky...if anyone is ever in this area, I would love to meet. God Bless!! | ||
| kerri | Posted: Jun 27, 2007 03:05:06 PM Hey Lisa~ We are in Jacksonville. I think you will be about 3 hours away. New Port Richie is such a nice little town. I think it will be awesome to meet your BM before hand. That is what we did with our second BM and it was so much better!!! We love Madison's BM but it was so much more comfortable with Nick's because we had already formed a relationship wtih her. It all depends on how your case is going...... with Nick's adoption they sent a social worker that worked in Orlando but was hired out by Jeanne's office. With Madison's adoption they sent Danelle from Jeanne's office. She was just awesome! Who is your BM's specialist? | ||
| whitney | Posted: Jun 27, 2007 01:35:18 PM Thanks for the encouragement ladies! It means so much to have the support of others who know what you are going through! It just has to be soon - doesn't it? Lisa - a girl! How exciting! Any names yet? Glad it went so well! Florida will be nice in October! We met Kaitlin's birthmother once before the birth and it was the best meeting! I think it will be great that we can tell her about it when she is older. Sounds like things are going really well for you all and now you can dream about little girls for 3+ months! Will keep you and Adrienne in my prayers that it all goes smooth and perfect. I would love to see pictures of all the babies (Carson, Alex, Hailey, and Abby! Jenn & Carol - I need to email you but I keep forgetting! It is neat how since we have been waiting there have been 2 boys and 2 girls born, and we are waiting on a boy and a girl! | ||
| Lisa | Posted: Jun 27, 2007 01:02:52 PM Kerri, Thank you!!! Jeanne will be our attorney as well. Does she come to the hospital? Where in Florida do you live? We will be in the New Port Richie area. I hope and pray that everything goes smoothly. I agree with you in the fact that I bet Whitney has been selected by a birth mother, but just doesn't know it yet. | ||
| kerri | Posted: Jun 27, 2007 12:07:01 PM Hey Lisa~ I am so excited for you!! I live in Fl.......... so if you need anything while you are here let me know!! A little girl........ how precious!! Both of my sweet babies were born at the same hospital in Orlando. You couldn't have a bette state to adopt from. Jeanne Tate (the attorney) is just AWESOME!! Whitney~ I feel in my heart that you may be in a match and just not know it yet! I can't wait to read when you get the call. | ||
| whitney | Posted: Jun 27, 2007 11:07:07 AM Welcome Nicole! Adoption is a wonderful journey and I so blessed to have done it once and waiting for a second. Adrienne, I really cannot believe that little boy has not been born yet! Best of luck waiting the next few days. Kaitlin's birthmother was set to be induced June 10, but started dilating about 2 weeks before, but not enough to do anything. She really wanted to be induced earlier than they did. So for a few weeks we were scared to travel too far from home and were just waiting. Of course she went into labor and had Kaitlin June 9, so I know how you feel. Lisa - HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Boy or girl? How was the teleconference? | ||
| Lisa | Posted: Jun 27, 2007 10:58:26 AM Good Morning Ladies, I tried posting earlier this morning but it didn't work. Our conf. call last night went great. Our birth mother is wonderful. I am still in awe that she has chosen us to parent her child. We really hit it off. She invited us to Florida to visit her before the baby is born so as soon as she gives us a few dates we will book a flight. I can't wait. The big news was that she had her ultrasound last week and she said "You are having A GIRL"!!! I can't believe it! We are tickled pink!!!! It is definitely more real now. Thank all of you for your continued support. The next few months will be stressful and hopefully everything will work out in the end and we will be able to bring home a beautiful little girl. I hope that everyone has a wonderful day!!! PS- Today is my b-day, and it is the best one ever!!!! Trish, Thank you for your kind words. How is your little guy doing? I would love to see some pictures. Adrienne, Hang in there, you are almost there. I can only imagine how anxious you must be to hold your little boy. Nicole, Welcome!!! The women on this forum are great!! We waited 9.5 months in the T2 program and trust me when I tell you that "the call" will come. Jenn, How are you??? Please e-mail me when you get a minute. I am glad to hear that Hailey is doing well and I hope that you are feeling better. It sounds like you are really busy!!! I will talk to you soon. Last, but certainly not least, Whitney, hang in there. You are next... I know it. Good things come to those who wait, so trust me it will be so sweet. We are here for you in the interim. You are in my thoughts. | ||
