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“What does adoption mean to a child?”

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How to Place a 4-Month-Old Up for Adoption

And What You Should Know About the Process

It’s not uncommon for us to receive a phone call from a prospective birth mother a few months after her stay in the hospital. She might even ask, “Is a 4-month-old baby too old for adoption?”

The answer to that question is always no. There is never a time when you can’t choose adoption for your baby.

“Pop-ups” are what we use to refer to an adoption after the prospective birth mother has already left the hospital. This type of adoption is very common, so you shouldn’t be deterred from choosing adoption. If you’re considering this option for your 4-month-old, there are a couple things you should know.

To receive free information, call 1-800-ADOPTION now to speak with an adoption specialist.

Am I “Giving Up” Too Soon?

After taking your child home from the hospital, you may have felt confident in your decision to parent. But over the past 16 weeks or more, you’ve been questioning if parenting is the right choice for you.

Maybe you’re trying to parent alone without the support of the birth father. Or maybe you haven’t received as much financial assistance as you thought you would, putting more strain on yourself as you try to meet your baby’s needs. These are all valid reasons to start thinking about adoption.

 At 4 months, your child is starting to differentiate you from other caregivers, and is even showing signs of attachment. Knowing this can make you feel shame and guilt about giving adoption any thought in the first place. But there’s one important thing that you should always remember.

Choosing adoption doesn’t mean that you’re “giving up” on your child or on being a part of your child’s life. Women choose adoption out of pure love for their child. It means that you’re ready to give them the best gift of all — a better life.

What if I Regret Placing My 4-Month-Old Up for Adoption?

After their pregnancy, many women experience symptoms of postpartum depression. These feelings may lead you to start questioning your ability to parent your baby.

If you’ve only thought about adoption a few times, but you’re otherwise happy as a new mother, you should take some extra time to process these feelings. But, if you keep coming back to the idea of placing your child for adoption, it might be time to give it some thought.

If you want to learn more about placing a 4-month-old for adoption, you should speak with an adoption specialist that can better help you determine if this is the best option for you.

What Does the Adoption Process Look Like for a 4-Month-Old?

Placing a baby for adoption at 4 months doesn’t look all that different from any other infant adoption. If you’ve gone through all the steps to make sure that adoption is right for you and you’re ready to make an adoption plan, here is what the process looks like:

  • Step 1: You’ll start by calling 1-800-ADOPTION to speak with one of our adoption specialists. From there, they’ll ask you to fill out your medical and social history forms. As your child is 4 months old, you’ll also need to fill out social and medical history forms for them. You’ll then be assigned an adoption specialist who will help you throughout the rest of your adoption journey.

  • Step2: Once you’ve given your adoption specialist a list of preferences you’d like to see in an adoptive family, they’ll send you a number of adoptive family profiles to look through.

  • Step 3: Once you’ve settled on an adoptive family, you’ll start getting to know them. Your adoption specialist will be the one to mediate the first call. After that, you can get to know each other through phone calls, emails, and even visits if you live nearby.

  • Step 4: Once you’ve gotten to know the adoptive family, you’ll be able to discuss your preference for post-adoption contact. If you would like to have plenty of contact with your child after the adoption, you’ll just want to find a family that has those same goals in mind.

  • Step 5: After your adoption specialist and adoption attorney have explained your rights in an adoption thoroughly, you’ll sign your consent to the adoption.  Once you have signed away your parental rights you won’t be able to change your mind later on, so it’s important to understand your state laws beforehand.

Many women worry that placing a child for adoption will be an additional expense they’re not ready for. However, placing a child for adoption, even at 4 months old, won’t cost you any money. In addition, you’ll also be entitled to:

  • Free legal representation with a trusted attorney

  • 24/7 access to counseling and education through our adoption hotline

  • The ability to choose the adoptive family you’ll be placing your baby with

  • Your preference for post-adoption contact

Even though it may feel like you’re choosing adoption at the last moment, the truth is that there’s no perfect time to choose adoption. To learn more about your options when it comes to placing a 4-month-old for adoption, call 1-800-ADOPTION now to receive free information. 

Information available through these links is the sole property of the companies and organizations listed therein. America Adoptions, Inc. provides this information as a courtesy and is in no way responsible for its content or accuracy.

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Frequently Asked Questions

Why is American Adoptions the right adoption agency choice for many birth mothers?

American Adoptions is one of the largest licensed adoption agencies in the United States. Each year, we work with thousands of women who are facing an unplanned pregnancy and offer assistance to these women. Our large, caring staff is able to assist you seven days a week and provide you with one-on-one counseling about your pregnancy and available options.

You should choose an adoption agency where you feel completely comfortable with their services and staff. With American Adoptions, you will work with an Adoption Specialist who is on-call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The Adoption Specialist will be your advocate and will provide support and guidance as you create an adoption plan that is right for you.

How will the family tell my child about me and the adoption when my child is older?

Each family has their own style of introducing adoption to the child. When you are matched with an adoptive family, you can ask them this question. If you would like your Adoption Specialist to discuss it for you, just let her know. He or she can share your wishes or provide good ideas from other adoptive families.

You will also be able to share what you want your baby to know about you. You can complete a keepsake booklet to share hobbies, stories, photos of you and your family and a letter to your baby. The adoptive family can provide this to your child as he or she grows older. Be as creative as you like! Some birth mothers have even knitted a special blanket as a gift to their baby or given a similar symbol of their love.

The father of your baby can fill out the birth father's keepsake booklet or write a letter too. You may have other family members who would also like to share photos or a letter to the baby. This is your opportunity to pass on your and your family's love and to share your personality, history and reasons for choosing adoption. The adoptive family will treasure whatever information you provide and will share it with the baby at an appropriate age. In most adoptive homes, the word adoption is in the child's vocabulary early on, and adoption is celebrated in their lives.

Additional Resources

Teen Pregnancy - Information for Young Women

While not every woman who chooses adoption is a young mother, many are. Through adoption, many young women have found an ability to give their babies the best life possible, while finding the opportunity to realize their own dreams, as well. Call American Adoptions today at 1-800-ADOPTION.

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Adoption Glossary

Do adoption terms and phrases leave you feeling confused? Learn the meaning to key adoption words and phrases with our comprehensive adoption glossary.

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