You Are Not "giving up"

From talk shows to books and even casual conversation amongst friends, the term "give up" has unfortunately become synonymous with adoption. Birth mothers are often referred to as women who chose to "give up" their babies for adoption. However, if American society stopped to think about what we were really saying, we would realize that it couldn't be further from the truth.

The reality of adoption is that birth mothers do not "give up" anything. When faced with an unplanned pregnancy, birth mothers wade through a sea of emotion, finding their inner strength and the courage to pursue adoption.

By choosing adoption, birth mothers do not "give up" their baby for adoption. Instead, they are choosing a life for their children - a life complete with all of the hugs, laughter and lullabies that they desire for them. Birth mothers choose to do not what is easiest for themselves, but choose the long, emotional path to adoption out of nothing but pure love for their child.

Today's adoptions are very different than those even one generation ago, let alone how adoptions were in the 1950s or 1960s. Gone are the days when a birth mother simply handed her baby over to an adoptive family, never to see or hear from them again - never knowing how her child grew up, never knowing how much her child was loved.

Today's birth mothers see firsthand how their baby grows up though pictures, letters and sometimes even visits and phone calls. Birth mothers not only choose adoption, but they also choose the life they imagine for their baby. From family pets to holiday traditions, a birth mother chooses a family for her baby that fits all of the hopes and dreams she has for her child.

When faced with great adversity, birth mothers show great courage and understanding. Out of nothing more than pure love for their baby, birth mothers choose adoption - giving not only their babies a life full of love, but parents a baby to cherish. Just as they cherish their new baby, adoptive parents will also cherish the birth mother for not choosing to "give up" on her baby.

Rather than "giving up" their babies, birth mothers do quite the opposite - they place their babies into the arms of an eternally grateful, loving family that will spend their days doing nothing more than cherishing the gift that birth mother gave them.