How Will the Adoptive Family Talk to My Child About Adoption?

Why Adoptees are Told About Adoption When They are Young

If you are considering adoption, are you wondering how your child will be told his or her adoption story and about you? You may even wonder if your child will be told about the adoption at all, or if the child will grow up not even knowing that he or she was adopted.

American Adoptions recommends that adoptive families tell their child that they are adopted from a very early age, so they grow up understanding that they are adopted. Most families begin with books and story time to help familiarize the child with the vocabulary of adoption. As the child gets older, they’ll share more details of the adoption story, making sure that they are age-appropriate to the child’s stage of development. Most importantly, they try to make sure the child feels safe and loved and has positive self-identity.

Most families tell their child everything you want him or her to know about you and the rest of your family. In addition to sharing this information, most families say that they tell the child about the time they got to spend with you, how special you are to their family and how much you love him or her. 

If there is anything special that you would like the adoptive family to share with your child or keepsakes you’d like for them to have in the future, talk with your Adoption Specialist and the adoptive family to ensure your wishes are met. 

Keep in mind, however, that if you and the adoptive family agree on sharing an open adoption, you will be able to share the adoption story with your child yourself one day.

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