Things to Consider About Adoption

1. Why do some pregnant women choose adoption?

• Some women are putting their baby's needs ahead of their own and do so out of love for the child.
• Some women desire to give their child everything they are not able to provide at this time.
• Some women want a stable, two-parent home for their child, and most adoptive families can provide this because they are secure financially and emotionally, and have been waiting to be parents.
• Some women want their child to be able to go to college and have a wonderful education.
• Some women want their child to have a large and supportive extended family for their child.
• Some women realize their current situation is not the best for their child and do not want to struggle from day-to-day.
• Some women already have children, and know that having another would hinder their ability to meet those children's needs as well as a new baby.
• Some women do not have good, strong support from family or friends to help them with raising a baby, and cannot do it alone. To the contrary, some women have good, strong family support but do not want to rely on others to help raise the baby.
• Some women don't want to try and raise a child with the birth father because he is not a good influence or because he is not supportive financially or emotionally, or both.
• Some women recognize that the relationship, or lack thereof, they have with the birth father will make raising the baby too difficult.
• Some women are scared and did not plan for this to happen in their life at this point. They want to find a way to bring the baby into the world and continue on with their goals such as education, employment, etc.
• Some women are not ready to parent, but do not believe in abortion so adoption is a wonderful solution.

2. What kind of adoption would I want?

• Do I want a Closed, Semi-Open, or Open Adoption?
• Do I want to select the adoptive family for my baby?
• Do I want to meet the adoptive family?
• Do I want to participate in conference calls with the family?
• Do I want the adoptive family to be with me at the hospital?
• Do I want to spend time with the baby at the hospital?
• Do I want other friends and family members to meet the adoptive parents?
• After the adoption, would I like to get updates on how the child is doing?
• After the adoption, would I like to receive pictures?
• After the adoption, would I like to communicate with the adoptive parents?

3. What kind of mom and dad would I want for my baby?

• Is religion important to me?
• Does age or race matter?
• Do I want one parent to stay at home?
• Do I want the family to have a child or children already so my child will have siblings? Or, do I want to choose a family with no children yet?
• Personality traits – am I looking for something in particular?
• Physical traits – are there certain things that are important to me?
• Are their jobs important to me?
• Do I want a family from the country, big city or beach community?
• Do I want to know about their extended families?

4. Further questions to ask myself about adoption:

• Have I shared my adoption plans with anyone?
• If yes, how do they feel about it?
• If no, what is my plan for telling people?
• Is anyone not supportive of my adoption plans? How important are their opinions? Do I need help educating these people about adoption so I can help them understand my reasons for choosing adoption?
• Have I thought about what is best for my baby? Have I thought about how my child's life might look if I parent? Have I thought about how my child's life might look if I chose adoption?
• Have I thought about my future goals? How will I best accomplish them? If I parent a child, will I be able to do all that I wanted before learning of my pregnancy?
• If I have other children already, how might choosing adoption allow more time, energy and resources to devote to them? How can I talk with my other children about adoption?
• If the birth father is involved, how will I talk with him about this decision? What if he is not supportive of adoption? What role do I want him to play in my life and that of my child?
• How do I begin to sort through all these questions and ensure I am making the best decision for my child?

American Adoptions encourages you to contact an adoption professional to help you sort through all of your options. At first, it is not easy to consider all of these questions, but if you take time to really consider these questions, you have empowered yourself with the ability to create the best plan for you and, most importantly, for your baby. You can contact American Adoptions anytime at (800) ADOPTION (236-7846) or contact us online. Our Adoption Specialists are available anytime to help you answer these questions and any others you may have.