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Grishma & Danielle
We are extremely excited to be given this opportunity to grow our family and cannot wait to share all our love with a child. Being parents would mean everything to us. We understand that this is not an easy decision and commend your courage, strength and selflessness in exploring adoption for your child. We want to thank you whole-heartedly for reviewing our profile and considering us to be part of your journey.
We both feel that sharing our adoption journey with our children is very important. It is something that we are very proud of and want to be completely open with our children about. We want our children to know that we embarked on this journey because of how much we wanted them in our lives and because of all the love that we wanted to share with them.
We understand that because our children will more than likely be of a different race than us, it's going to be very evident that they're adopted, so it's something that needs to be explained to them from a young age. It is important for them to understand what adoption is and to know how to approach any questions they may be asked. As parents, we know that it is our responsibility to guide them through these questions.
We also want them to know that their birth mother/parents chose adoption because of how much they love them and because they wanted to give them all the opportunities that they could. They need to know that it was an extremely difficult decision for their birth mother, but that we have them in our lives because of the selfless decision that their birth mother made. We want our children to know that adoption has been a huge blessing for us, and want them to always feel that there are so many people that want the best for them.
Education I/We will Provide
Education is very important to the two of us, and we want to give our children the best education possible. To us, not only do we want our children to have good book-smarts, but we want to provide a well-rounded education as well. Along with reading books, we will encourage music, art and dance in our household. We want our children to be excited about learning, so we believe that going to museums, plays and traveling is a great way to teach our child about all the different and wonderful things this world has to offer. We will encourage creativity and personal growth on every level possible. We will teach our children the importance of being a good person and how to use their education to help others.
As parents we don't want to force a certain path on our children based on our aspirations. Instead, we want to give them the ability and opportunity to choose the path they want to take so that they feel passionate about what they decide to do with their lives. We want to always support and guide our children by providing the skills they need so that they can make decisions on their own and stand confidently on their own two feet. We want to show them that you can learn important lessons from everyday life and that the people around you can be your best teachers. We truly believe that providing a good, well-rounded education is the most powerful tool we can offer our children to boost self-confidence and independence, so that they can gain skills that are crucial for their growth and success.
Addressing Cultural Diversity
We have both been raised with strong Indian traditions in our upbringing. We understand how important it is for children to feel a sense of belonging to their cultural heritage and want to embrace that completely in how we raise our children. We plan to not only teach our children about our Indian culture and values, but also want to make sure that we are fully immersed in the traditions of their racial/ethnic background.
We understand that having a successful transracial adoption will be the result of our family's willingness to educate ourselves and recognize that we might not be able to be everything to our children. Our child will also need to connect with others who share their racial background. We want to embrace and celebrate the history and culture from which our child comes from so that they grow up with a strong sense of racial identity.
Even though English would be the primary language in our household, learning another language would be encouraged as this would promote a strong sense of understanding and openness to other cultures. We believe that it is our responsibility to teach our children early on that in our differences there is beauty and strength. We see this everyday in our lives as we live in a diverse city with many different cultures, ethnicities and traditions. They say it takes a village to raise a child, and in this case, we believe that it is especially true.
Our Extended Families
We both have big families that are extremely supportive of our decision to embark on our adoption journey. Danielle's family consists of her mom and dad, older sister, younger brother and little beagle named Timber. Danielle's family lives overseas and come to visit us every year. During this time, we love going on road trips and exploring different cities around America. We also throw a big Christmas party every year and have our tradition of playing White Elephant and having a huge Christmas feast with our favorite Indian food.
Grishma's side of the family consists of her dad, older sister, younger sister and younger brother. All her siblings are married and have little children, whom we adore. Our 7 nieces and nephews range from a few months old to 16 years of age. Her side of the family, including her extended family, lives very close to us and we spend most weekends together for birthday celebrations, to watch the big game or for family game nights. We have fierce 'sequence' and 'phase 10' competitions at our house, where we compete as siblings versus in-laws. As the kids have gotten older, they are also part of the excitement as we add more games to our rotation. There is never a dull moment and we always have a blast. We all know how lucky we are to have one another and can't wait to grow our family.
Our House and Neighborhood
Illinois - We live in a suburban waterfront community in Illinois. Our neighbors consist of a mix of retired, older couples and younger families. We are close enough to a big city to enjoy the perks of amazing festivals, museums, and different cultures, but can come back to our quiet neighborhood. Along our street, there are always families taking walks together, biking and playing hockey and basketball on their driveways. Our neighborhood also has annual Easter egg hunts and Halloween costume parties for the kids.
We live in a beautiful home with 3 bedrooms and an amazing view of the water. Our favorite part of the house is the living room, where we cuddle and watch movies. On weekends, we love having our morning coffee on the pier and waving to people on their boats. Ever year, we spend the 4th of July weekend with the family on our huge deck grilling, watching the boat parade and enjoying the spectacular fireworks right from our backyard. When we bought this house, we envisioned our kids playing in the backyard, going kayaking together or sitting on the pier as a family watching the sunsets. We cannot wait to raise children here, and make lasting memories.
From Us to You
The words ‘thank you’ seem to be too simple to express our full gratitude to you for considering us for this huge blessing. We can’t even presume to understand the immense difficulty in making this decision but we want to thank you from the bottom of our hearts for allowing us to be part of your journey. It takes a special kind of strength that only mothers have to make this tough decision, so we hope that this letter will bring you some form of solace in knowing that we will do our very best to provide unconditional love and care for your baby.
We have been together in a committed relationship for 11 years now, married for 5, and most of our relationship was long distance. Our modern love story started on a dating app, and we knew very early on in our emails/conversations that we had something special that we didn’t want to let go of. You know what a genuine and loving person someone is, when it is expressed completely through writing. The first time we met in person was in a taxi a year later in Los Angeles, but strangely enough we were both so nervous that we could barely make eye contact with each other (Grishma couldn't stop giggling and Danielle couldn't stop shaking) for the entire ride to the hotel. We always have a good laugh looking back at that first meeting.
In the next 6 years of our long distance relationship we only saw each other once a year, so we know how important it is to have good communication and have a strong foundation of trust. All the struggles and heartache we felt being apart from each other was completely worth it because we knew we were meant to be with each other. We have worked very hard to be together and take nothing for granted. We also knew early on in our relationship that we wanted a big family of our own. We are both from big Indian families and cherish the importance of being surrounded by people you love. Every birthday and holiday is a huge celebration and we cannot wait to share that with our own little bundles of joy. Their grandparents, aunts and uncles are all so excited to meet them and we know that they will spoil them rotten. Our children will also have so much fun with all their cousins.
We are going to be completely open with our children about their adoption as it’s something we are extremely excited and proud about. We chose adoption because we feel in our hearts that it does not take genetics to be a family. All it takes is unconditional love and unwavering support. We want our children to know that adoption has been a wonderful blessing for us and want them to always feel that there are so many people who love them and want the best for them. We want them to know that you chose adoption because of how much you love them and because you wanted to give them all the opportunities that you could. They need to know that it was an extremely difficult decision for you, but that we have them in our lives because of the selfless decision that you made. You are always going to be a part of our family, but it is completely up to you to let us know how involved you would like to be. We promise that we will send photos, videos and updates as much as possible. We will also share phone calls and visits if that is something that you would like. You will always have a very special place in our hearts.
We know that parenthood is going to be the toughest job that we will ever have, but we know whole-heartedly that we want to start a family. We have so much love to give and we believe that it will be very evident in the way we raise our children. Adoption will make our dream of starting a family come true and we want to thank you so much for helping us make that a reality.
Grishma & Danielle
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