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How Adopted Children Feel

You want a brighter future for your child, and you can find the perfect family to give them a life full of opportunities.

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Your decision to choose adoption and a brighter future for your child isn’t about giving up. It’s giving your child the opportunity to live the best life possible with a family who can provide the love, support and foundation to see their dreams become a reality.

Choosing adoption takes courage. It can also be helpful to know how adoptees feel. The video above is a great opportunity to hear from an adoptee directly. As you continue reading, we’ll address some of the frequently asked questions birth mothers have about their children.

You can also connect with one of our adoption specialists by filling out this free online contact form or calling 1-800-ADOPTION to learn more.

How Do Adopted Children Feel?

"[My birth parents] wanted a different life for themselves and for me. They made an incredibly tough call, but it opened up a lot of opportunities for all of us, and that’s something I’ve always respected."

- Adoptee Diana,
  More on her story here.

Because open adoption has become the most common type of adoption, children placed with a family most often know their birth parents and understand that they chose adoption from a place of love.

Open adoption allows for a birth mother like you to remain connected—at whatever level you want—to your child and gives them a chance to get to know you, ask questions and understand why you made the decision you did.

Modern adoptions are open because they provide clarity and help children embrace a positive identity around their adoption. Closed adoptions, once common, increased the chances that adoptees would develop feelings of abandonment or being given up on.

Will My Child Understand My Decision?

This is a common concern for women who are considering adoption.

In many cases, pregnant women and new moms face complex issues and circumstances in life that make parenting impossible. Choosing adoption helps avoid the burden of parenting and gives birth parents a chance to remain focused on their goals.

It also gives the child a chance to live the best life possible. Through open communication and honest conversations about adoption, your child has every chance to understand why you chose adoption and how it resulted in better opportunities for them.

Open communication lines with your child and the adoptive family can also provide answers to questions as they arise.

Do you have more questions about your child understanding their adoption story? Call 1-800-ADOPTION or complete our online form to speak to a specialist today.

Is Adoption Right for My Child?

Did you know the top childhood dream jobs include:

  • Doctor
  • Teacher
  • Veterinarian
  • Musician
  • Police office

One of the hardest things to do is decide whether or not your child will have the opportunity to achieve their dream.

Adoption is never questioning your love for your child but whether or not your current situation is best suited to provide them the foundation to grow and thrive. Many women choose adoption because they want their babies to have a better life than they could provide. This takes honesty, courage and love.

Can My Child Know Me?

Through open adoption, your child can absolutely know you. In fact, most adoption professionals encourage having at least some level of openness in your adoption.

There are numerous benefits to your child knowing you.

  • They have access to important medical history
  • They can understand their past
  • They can avoid identity issues
  • You both can develop a meaningful relationship

You’re in control of your adoption. That means you control how much communication you have and, ultimately, how well your child knows you.

Remember, you can always call 1-800-ADOPTION or contact us online to learn more about adoptees, how they feel and how you have the chance to build a lifelong bond.

You can also watch stories from adoptees here.

Information available through these links is the sole property of the companies and organizations listed therein. American Adoptions provides this information as a courtesy and is in no way responsible for its content or accuracy.

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Frequently Asked Questions

Why is American Adoptions the right adoption agency choice for many birth mothers?

American Adoptions is one of the largest licensed adoption agencies in the United States. Each year, we work with thousands of women who are facing an unplanned pregnancy and offer assistance to these women. Our large, caring staff is able to assist you seven days a week and provide you with one-on-one counseling about your pregnancy and available options.

You should choose an adoption agency where you feel completely comfortable with their services and staff. With American Adoptions, you will work with an Adoption Specialist who is on-call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The Adoption Specialist will be your advocate and will provide support and guidance as you create an adoption plan that is right for you.

How will the family tell my child about me and the adoption when my child is older?

Each family has their own style of introducing adoption to the child. When you are matched with an adoptive family, you can ask them this question. If you would like your Adoption Specialist to discuss it for you, just let her know. He or she can share your wishes or provide good ideas from other adoptive families.

You will also be able to share what you want your baby to know about you. You can complete a keepsake booklet to share hobbies, stories, photos of you and your family and a letter to your baby. The adoptive family can provide this to your child as he or she grows older. Be as creative as you like! Some birth mothers have even knitted a special blanket as a gift to their baby or given a similar symbol of their love.

The father of your baby can fill out the birth father's keepsake booklet or write a letter too. You may have other family members who would also like to share photos or a letter to the baby. This is your opportunity to pass on your and your family's love and to share your personality, history and reasons for choosing adoption. The adoptive family will treasure whatever information you provide and will share it with the baby at an appropriate age. In most adoptive homes, the word adoption is in the child's vocabulary early on, and adoption is celebrated in their lives.

Additional Resources

Teen Pregnancy - Information for Young Women

While not every woman who chooses adoption is a young mother, many are. Through adoption, many young women have found an ability to give their babies the best life possible, while finding the opportunity to realize their own dreams, as well. Call American Adoptions today at 1-800-ADOPTION.

Read More

Adoption Glossary

Do adoption terms and phrases leave you feeling confused? Learn the meaning to key adoption words and phrases with our comprehensive adoption glossary.

Read More