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How to Find a Birth Mother to Adopt From

And How American Adoptions Can Help

You will learn a lot during your adoption journey, but one of the first steps is finding out how to find a birth mother to adopt from.

We can help you get connected to adoption opportunities here, or you can call 1-800-ADOPTION.

In this article, learn about finding a birth mother for private adoption and discover the services American Adoptions offers to make the process easier when you’re hoping to find a child to adopt.

Why Work with an Agency to Find a Baby to Adopt?

If you are wondering how to find prospective birth mothers for adoption, the answer, in many cases, is to work with a private domestic adoption agency.

It is sometimes possible to find a prospective birth mother without an agency — and in an effort to save on adoption costs, some adoptive families choose this route as they research how to find a baby to adopt.

However, consider some of the challenges for families who search for potential birth parents independently as they’re looking for a child to adopt:

  • Without an agency like American Adoptions, these families have to advertise on their own to find pregnant women considering adoption, often paying more for less effective advertising services when looking for adoption opportunities. They have to be willing to exchange identifying contact information and answer calls in response to the advertisements they place.
  • In some states, it is also illegal to independently advertise as a potential adoptive family – some states require an independent third party (usually an adoption agency) to ensure the safety of the child and parents during the adoption process.
  • If advertising for independent adoptions is legal in your area, when an expectant mother finally contacts you, it will be up to you to independently evaluate her commitment to adoption — and without an agency’s expert screening services, you may be more susceptible to an adoption disruption or, in some cases, adoption fraud.
  • If the adoption disrupts, you risk losing all of the money they invested with that expectant mother, and you have to begin the entire process again. And if you do find a birth mother to adopt from again, your previous experience with adoption can make you wary of starting over from square one.
  • When adopting directly from a birth mother without an agency’s involvement or trying to find a child to adopt online, hopeful adoptive families often have a harder time making their adoption dreams come true.

Before researching how to find birth mothers for adoption on your own, consider the services that you might miss out on if you choose not to work with an adoption agency. These are just some of the factors to consider as you are figuring out how to find a birth mother for independent adoption.

Working with an adoption agency largely eliminates the emotional and financial stress of searching for an adoption opportunity with an expectant mother. American Adoptions provides all of the services necessary to help your family find an adoption opportunity that is:

  • Safe. When researching how to find a baby to adopt, safety should be one of your top concerns. All of the expectant mothers who contact our agency are screened to ensure they are truly committed to adoption, helping to limit the risk of an adoption disruption or adoption fraud.
  • Timely. Because we advertise through many platforms to expectant mothers across the U.S., our adoption wait times are significantly lower than most adoption professionals’; most adoptive families are able to adopt within a year of joining our agency.
  • Compatible. When you’re going through the process of finding a prospective birth mother to adopt from, you might be concerned about getting to know each other. Our adoption specialists search specifically for the types of adoption opportunities you are comfortable with in your adoption plan.
  • Secure. Finding a baby to adopt can quickly become an expensive endeavor. If an adoption doesn’t work out, it can drain your adoption budget and derail your dream of becoming a family. We provide financial protection against adoption disruptions so you can adopt within your budget.

No matter what your needs are while you’re looking for a baby to adopt, we can help you find a birth mother to adopt from that’s just as excited to meet you as you are to meet her. 

How to Find a Birth Mother for Private Adoption with Our Agency

Much of the adoption process involves finding the perfect adoption opportunity for your family, so we provide a wide range of services to help make that happen. Below, learn more about the steps our agency takes to help locate adoption opportunities with prospective birth mothers.

Step 1: Advertising and Marketing

American Adoptions has developed an extensive advertising network and expert marketing services to reach expectant mothers across the country. Through traditional and online advertising methods, our agency is able to work with hundreds of women considering adoption each year. These advertising and marketing efforts directly increase the number of adoption opportunities available through our agency, limiting adoptive families’ wait times.

Step 2: Screening and Counseling

When an expectant mother contacts American Adoptions, she will work with her own qualified adoption specialist to learn more about her options and the adoption matching process with our agency. Her adoption specialist will evaluate her commitment to adoption and ensure she is receiving the counseling, support and other services she needs to have a healthy pregnancy and feel confident about her adoption decision.

Prospective birth mothers also complete a social and medical history form, which includes detailed information about their family medical history, any known information about the baby’s birth father, and their own health and substance use information. This form is used along with an expectant mother’s adoption plan to help find adoptive parents who would be a good fit for the adoption opportunity.

Step 3: Adoption Planning

Meanwhile, you will work with your own adoption specialist to complete a similar adoption plan. Your Adoption Planning Questionnaire (APQ) outlines the types of adoption opportunities you picture for your family, including the race(s) you feel you are ready to parent, the medical history and substance exposure you are comfortable with, your adoption budget, and more.

Your adoption specialist will use your APQ to look for expectant mothers whose social-medical history and adoption plan align well with your adoption goals and preferences.

Step 4: Adoptive Family Profiles and Video Profiles

Before becoming an actively waiting family with American Adoptions, you will also complete an adoptive family profile and video profile. Your adoptive family profile introduces your family, lifestyle, home, interests and goals to prospective birth mothers through text and photos that you submit to our agency.

You will receive video recording equipment to film your adoptive family video profile, which includes on-camera interviews with you, your friends and family members, as well as real home videos of you doing the things you love. Remember, when you’re looking for baby to adopt, it’s important to show your authentic self.

Once you are fully active with American Adoptions, these profiles will be presented to prospective birth mothers who may be a good fit for your family, giving them a glimpse into your family’s home, lifestyle, interests, values and parenting dreams.

Step 5: Pre-Placement Contact

When a prospective birth mother decides she wants to pursue adoption with your family, your adoption specialist will contact you about the adoption opportunity. You will likely have an opportunity to get to know the expectant mother through pre-placement contact.

Your adoption specialist will coordinate a mediated conference call with the prospective birth parents. He or she will provide some background information about the adoption opportunity and help prepare you for the call, remaining on the line to help guide the conversation if you need it.

Many adoptive families think of this first conference call as a sort of “adoption match meeting,” where both parties have an opportunity to get to know each other in a comfortable, mediated setting.

After your initial phone call, you may have more phone calls, exchange email, or even visit the prospective birth parents in their hometown as you continue to build a relationship with them. Finding a birth mother to adopt from can be an overwhelming experience, but the end result is always worth it.

Start Your Process

Finding a prospective birth mother for private adoption may seem overwhelming — but working with an agency like American Adoptions can help put your mind at ease. Our expert advertising, screening, adoption planning and contact mediation services can help you find the perfect adoption opportunity in a safe, timely and affordable manner.

You can get help to find a prospective birth mother to adopt from— click here or call 1-800-ADOPTION


Information available through these links is the sole property of the companies and organizations listed therein. American Adoptions provides this information as a courtesy and is in no way responsible for its content or accuracy.

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Frequently Asked Questions

Why is American Adoptions the right adoption agency choice for many birth mothers?

American Adoptions is one of the largest licensed adoption agencies in the United States. Each year, we work with thousands of women who are facing an unplanned pregnancy and offer assistance to these women. Our large, caring staff is able to assist you seven days a week and provide you with one-on-one counseling about your pregnancy and available options.

You should choose an adoption agency where you feel completely comfortable with their services and staff. With American Adoptions, you will work with an Adoption Specialist who is on-call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The Adoption Specialist will be your advocate and will provide support and guidance as you create an adoption plan that is right for you.

How will the family tell my child about me and the adoption when my child is older?

Each family has their own style of introducing adoption to the child. When you are matched with an adoptive family, you can ask them this question. If you would like your Adoption Specialist to discuss it for you, just let her know. He or she can share your wishes or provide good ideas from other adoptive families.

You will also be able to share what you want your baby to know about you. You can complete a keepsake booklet to share hobbies, stories, photos of you and your family and a letter to your baby. The adoptive family can provide this to your child as he or she grows older. Be as creative as you like! Some birth mothers have even knitted a special blanket as a gift to their baby or given a similar symbol of their love.

The father of your baby can fill out the birth father's keepsake booklet or write a letter too. You may have other family members who would also like to share photos or a letter to the baby. This is your opportunity to pass on your and your family's love and to share your personality, history and reasons for choosing adoption. The adoptive family will treasure whatever information you provide and will share it with the baby at an appropriate age. In most adoptive homes, the word adoption is in the child's vocabulary early on, and adoption is celebrated in their lives.

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