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Is Adoption Right for Me? [How Adoption Can Create a Better Future]

5 Questions to Ask Yourself

If you are experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and aren’t sure that parenting or adding another child to your family is an option, you’re likely asking yourself, “Is adoption right for me?” Not only can adoption be right for you, but this loving and selfless choice positively impacts everyone involved. Call 1-800-ADOPTION to get started.

  • Your child can grow up in a loving and nurturing environment that provides everything you’d want for him or her. 

  • By choosing adoption, you can continue working toward your goals in life while also doing what’s best for you and your baby. 

  • Adoption gives a hopeful adoptive family the chance to live out their dreams of growing a family. 

“I didn’t know what to do, so I got on the internet and searched ‘adoption.’ I was trying to convince myself it was the right thing to do. The next day, I called American Adoptions and left my information. I had never known anyone who’d been through adoption, and I had a lot of questions. Social worker Erin immediately returned my call. She answered my questions, and we discussed the concept of adoption. When I hung up the phone (crying), I knew this was the right choice for me and the baby. It was what my child deserved.” - Sara, a birth mother who placed her child with American Adoptions.  

Putting your child up for adoption is a big decision to make — one that will impact the rest of both of your lives. So, how do you know if adoption is right for you? 

Ultimately, you are the only one who can answer this question. No matter your circumstances or where you might be in your adoption plan, you are always the one in charge — and you can always decide whether or not to follow through with your adoption plan at any time. 

When becoming a parent or raising another child isn’t the best option for you, adoption can be a loving and rewarding decision that creates a better life for everyone involved. You will have seemingly endless questions, even if you’ve already started the adoption process. The important thing to remember is that you are in complete control of your adoption journey.  

If you are asking, “How do you know if adoption is right for you?” you may consider also asking yourself some of these important questions.  

If you’re ready to start the adoption process with our agency or wanting more information on adoption, call us toll-free today at 1-800-ADOPTION, or visit our online contact forms for prospective birth mothers and prospective adoptive parents. 

1. Do I Fully Understand the Adoption Process? 

If you are wondering how to know if “giving a baby up for adoption” is the right thing for you, you first need to understand a few important things.

  • Adoption is not “giving up on” or “giving away” your baby; it is choosing to give your child the best life possible — a life you may not be able to provide yourself at this point in time. 

  • Adoption gives you the chance to choose parents for your baby, get to know them before giving birth, and even maintain a post-adoption relationship with them to watch your baby grow up. 

  • As a prospective birth mother, you will always be in charge of your journey.  You will determine what makes you comfortable each step of the way, including your preferences for adoption contact, your delivery experience and more, and you can make changes to your adoption plan at any time. 

To learn more about the realities of the adoption process, we encourage you to contact an adoption professional today at 1-800-ADOPTION

2. Am I Able to Raise This Child Right Now? 

If you’re asking, “Is adoption right for me?” ask yourself this: “Am I in a position to be the parent this child deserves right now?” 

Being a parent comes with a lot of responsibility and sacrifice. Your child’s interests will always come first, and you may need to give up certain things in your own life to provide them the opportunities they deserve. If you are currently parenting other children, it may be challenging to provide for another child without taking time, attention and resources away from your other kids. Perhaps you have other responsibilities to focus on or other life, financial and career goals in mind before you raise this child.

Choosing to place your child for adoption for any of these reasons is not selfish. By choosing adoption you are giving your child a chance to have a life full of opportunity. If you already have children of your own but aren’t in a place to parent another child,  you will selflessly be giving this child parents who want to grow their family while also giving yourself and your other children the best chance at achieving your goals. 

If you have thought about the emotional, financial and physical responsibilities of raising this child, and you know that you cannot take on those burdens, adoption may be the best choice for you

3. Am I Under Financial Duress? 

While you should never feel financially forced into choosing adoption, the financial benefits of placing your child for adoption may influence how to decide if adoption is right for you and your baby. Carrying a baby to term and raising him or her is expensive, and these expenses may be a huge factor in your decision. Even if you choose abortion, you will have to pay for your procedure. 

If you choose adoption, on the other hand, your pregnancy and adoption process will be completely free to you. You can even receive financial assistance for certain living expenses, like rent, groceries, transportation and other bills. Choosing adoption is difficult enough emotionally, so adoption professionals make sure that the financial burden is not overwhelming, as well. 

For many women, adoption allows them to improve their financial situation and get back on their feet after their pregnancy for a better future. 

4. Do I Want to Give This Baby a Life of Opportunity? 

Do you want to give this baby a chance at life but aren’t sure you are capable of parenting them right now? Or are you currently a parent but not sure raising another child is realistic? Adoption can be the perfect way to give your child the chance to live an amazing life while also creating a better future for yourself, your family and the adoptive family you choose to work with. Choosing adoption for your child instead of abortion when parenting isn’t an option has a positive impact and can give you the opportunity to:

  • Meet your baby, hold/him or her and begin developing a life-long bond with both your child and the adoptive family.

  • Watch your child grow and reach all of the amazing milestones in life. Open adoption includes communication with the adoptive family and your child via email, phone calls, video chats, letters, pictures and more.

  • Ensure your child knows who you are and how your decision to place him or her for adoption was selfless, heroic and full of love.

Do you want to give your child a chance at life but aren’t in a position to parent them right now? You do not have to be forced into parenting.

In fact, this situation is why many women ultimately choose adoption. While it’s not mentioned as much as abortion and parenting, adoption is always an available option for your unplanned pregnancy. 

5. Have I Thought Long and Hard About My Adoption Decision? 

No matter what suggestions and advice you receive from professionals, family and friends, you are ultimately the only one who can answer the question, “Is adoption right for me?” This is a deeply personal choice, so it’s important that you research all of your options and think hard before making any life-changing decisions. 

Adoption is not an “easy way out,” and neither is choosing to parent or get an abortion. Each process comes with its own pros and cons to consider, and which one is right for you will always be determined by your personal situation. While abortion is an option that must be decided on within a certain amount of time, you can choose adoption at any point in your pregnancy — even after you have given birth

How Can You Start Your Adoption Journey Today? [Your Adoption is a Life-Changing Experience]  

Do you feel ready to start your adoption journey? We are ready to guide you through the adoption process and help you find the perfect adoptive family for your child.   

For more guidance on how to decide if adoption is right for you, you can contact Michelle, a birth parent specialist and a birth parent herself. She is ready to answer any questions you have about adoption and can help you decide if this is the best option for you and your baby.            

“I am available to answer any questions that arise, particularly from birth moms, as I have been in your shoes and know how you are feeling,” Michelle said. “It was most helpful to me when I had someone to talk to who would just listen to me without making any judgments or conclusions about who I was as a person.”      

You can ask Michelle questions about the adoption process online. You can also call us toll-free at 1-800-ADOPTION, or get free information with our online contact form for prospective birth mothers considering adoption here. Adoptive families wanting more information on adopting a child can click here to get more information. 

 

Disclaimer
Information available through these links is the sole property of the companies and organizations listed therein. American Adoptions provides this information as a courtesy and is in no way responsible for its content or accuracy.

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Frequently Asked Questions

Why is American Adoptions the right adoption agency choice for many birth mothers?

American Adoptions is one of the largest licensed adoption agencies in the United States. Each year, we work with thousands of women who are facing an unplanned pregnancy and offer assistance to these women. Our large, caring staff is able to assist you seven days a week and provide you with one-on-one counseling about your pregnancy and available options.

You should choose an adoption agency where you feel completely comfortable with their services and staff. With American Adoptions, you will work with an Adoption Specialist who is on-call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The Adoption Specialist will be your advocate and will provide support and guidance as you create an adoption plan that is right for you.

How will the family tell my child about me and the adoption when my child is older?

Each family has their own style of introducing adoption to the child. When you are matched with an adoptive family, you can ask them this question. If you would like your Adoption Specialist to discuss it for you, just let her know. He or she can share your wishes or provide good ideas from other adoptive families.

You will also be able to share what you want your baby to know about you. You can complete a keepsake booklet to share hobbies, stories, photos of you and your family and a letter to your baby. The adoptive family can provide this to your child as he or she grows older. Be as creative as you like! Some birth mothers have even knitted a special blanket as a gift to their baby or given a similar symbol of their love.

The father of your baby can fill out the birth father's keepsake booklet or write a letter too. You may have other family members who would also like to share photos or a letter to the baby. This is your opportunity to pass on your and your family's love and to share your personality, history and reasons for choosing adoption. The adoptive family will treasure whatever information you provide and will share it with the baby at an appropriate age. In most adoptive homes, the word adoption is in the child's vocabulary early on, and adoption is celebrated in their lives.

Additional Resources

Teen Pregnancy - Information for Young Women

While not every woman who chooses adoption is a young mother, many are. Through adoption, many young women have found an ability to give their babies the best life possible, while finding the opportunity to realize their own dreams, as well. Call American Adoptions today at 1-800-ADOPTION.

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Adoption Glossary

Do adoption terms and phrases leave you feeling confused? Learn the meaning to key adoption words and phrases with our comprehensive adoption glossary.

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