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Finding LGBT Adoptive Families [How to Find the Perfect Family]

At American Adoptions, we help every woman we work with find exactly what she’s looking for in adoptive parents — and for many women, that includes LGBT adoptive families. American Adoptions works with many gay couples looking to adopt, and the process to find a gay couple to adopt a baby is easy. Just call 1-800-ADOPTION now to get free information with no obligation, or start viewing profiles of waiting same-sex adoptive couples here.

How do I find a gay couple to adopt my baby?

When you first begin to look for LGBT adoptive families for your baby, your American Adoptions adoption specialist will help you identify exactly what you’re looking for. She will help you answer the following questions:

  • Is it important to you that your child looks like his or her parents? Naturally, you can’t guarantee an adopted child will look like their adoptive family, as there is no shared DNA. However, some women prefer their babies be adopted by families who share the same racial or cultural background as they do.

  • Do you want your child to have siblings? Some women feel strongly about placing their child in a family that hasn’t been able to have children yet, which may describe many gay couples looking to adopt. Others prefer to place their babies in homes that already have children.

  • Do you picture your child growing up in a certain location? American Adoptions works with adoptive parents across the country, so wherever you envision your child growing up can be a reality. From large urban areas on the coasts to smaller towns in the Midwest, you can pick the location where your child grows up.

  • What values are important to you in adoptive parents for your child? Some women want their children to be raised in homes that practice a certain religion, while other women are concerned with things like politics or work ethic.  American Adoptions works with families from many different backgrounds, so you’re sure to find adoptive parents who share the same values you have.

As the birth mother, you will have control over every aspect of your adoption plan. Your adoption specialist will be by your side every step of the way to answer your questions and walk you through the adoption process, but you will always be able to make your own decisions.

When it comes to choosing the adoptive family, you will be able to list the qualities you would like to see in the family who will be raising your child. Your adoption specialist will have you fill out a questionnaire where you will be able to specify that you would like to place your baby with an LGBT adoptive family. From here, your adoption specialist will be able to find adoptive family profiles of LGBT adoptive couples that match your preferences. They will then present you with these profiles so that you can choose the perfect family for your baby.

To learn more about the gay couples hoping to adopt with American Adoptions, you can choose from different adoptive family types on our website and look at the profiles of families we work with. 

Benefits of Placing Children with LGBT Adoptive Families

While some adoption agencies may debate the merits of gay parents adopting kids, that’s not a debate we have here at American Adoptions. We have many LGBT adoptive families who have provided safe, loving homes for their children, and we’re more than happy to help more gay couples wanting to adopt.  In fact, we believe there are many advantages to placing your child in a home with a same-sex couple:

  • Children who are raised in LGBT adoptive families may be more likely to be sympathetic and understanding. Children who are raised in gay adoption families will know their family doesn’t necessarily look like a “traditional” family, but the differences will make them stronger individuals overall. These children are more likely to be kind, inclusive and compassionate people.

  • Children who are adopted by same-sex couples may be more confident. When you are taught from a young age — as children in LGBT adoptive families are — that being different is a source of pride rather than shame, the confidence instilled at a young age will teach children to be resilient, strong and independent.

  • LGBT adoptive families may be more understanding of mental and health issues. Ideally, fewer LGBT parents would experience prejudice during their own childhoods, but in reality, many of them did. Because of this, LGBT parents are motivated to give their child the life full of love and support that they might not have received. They are more likely to understand the seriousness of these conditions and maybe more responsive if these issues affect their own children.

  • Gay couples looking to adopt may make you feel better understood or more connected in terms of facing judgment or discrimination. If you are considering adoption for your child, you may be at a difficult stage in your life. Although you’re making a selfless decision, you may still feel judged or discriminated against because of your choice to consider adoption for your baby. Same-sex couples may understand better than most what it’s like to feel judged, and it may be easier to bond with them because of this. It’s recommended that you form a lifelong relationship with your child’s adoptive parents in an open adoption, so placing your child with a couple you relate to can make that bond that much stronger.

“We’ll absolutely keep up with our pictures and letters and do them from a positive, happy place of love so that she knows she’s not judged. We’re planning on also including in the letters, ‘Should your needs ever change, just let us know; we’d be happy to talk about engaging,’ so she knows that it’s not a closed window, it’s open,” said Paul, a dedicated LGBT adoptive parent.

It’s important to keep in mind that only you know what’s best for your baby; if you feel that your child’s place is with a gay couple looking to adopt, then that’s exactly the family you should choose. To learn more about LGBT adoptive families, call American Adoptions now at 1-800-ADOPTION to get more information.

Having trouble finding the perfect adoptive family online? Don’t be discouraged. American Adoptions is currently working with many adoptive families at all stages of the process — and not all of them are currently listed on our website. Additionally, we work with a nationwide network of other adoption professionals that can help us conduct a wider search for exactly the family you’re looking for.

To discuss your preferences for an adoptive family and get help finding them, reach out to an adoption specialist by calling 1-800-ADOPTION today.

Information available through these links is the sole property of the companies and organizations listed therein. American Adoptions provides this information as a courtesy and is in no way responsible for its content or accuracy.

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Frequently Asked Questions

Why is American Adoptions the right adoption agency choice for many birth mothers?

American Adoptions is one of the largest licensed adoption agencies in the United States. Each year, we work with thousands of women who are facing an unplanned pregnancy and offer assistance to these women. Our large, caring staff is able to assist you seven days a week and provide you with one-on-one counseling about your pregnancy and available options.

You should choose an adoption agency where you feel completely comfortable with their services and staff. With American Adoptions, you will work with an Adoption Specialist who is on-call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The Adoption Specialist will be your advocate and will provide support and guidance as you create an adoption plan that is right for you.

How will the family tell my child about me and the adoption when my child is older?

Each family has their own style of introducing adoption to the child. When you are matched with an adoptive family, you can ask them this question. If you would like your Adoption Specialist to discuss it for you, just let her know. He or she can share your wishes or provide good ideas from other adoptive families.

You will also be able to share what you want your baby to know about you. You can complete a keepsake booklet to share hobbies, stories, photos of you and your family and a letter to your baby. The adoptive family can provide this to your child as he or she grows older. Be as creative as you like! Some birth mothers have even knitted a special blanket as a gift to their baby or given a similar symbol of their love.

The father of your baby can fill out the birth father's keepsake booklet or write a letter too. You may have other family members who would also like to share photos or a letter to the baby. This is your opportunity to pass on your and your family's love and to share your personality, history and reasons for choosing adoption. The adoptive family will treasure whatever information you provide and will share it with the baby at an appropriate age. In most adoptive homes, the word adoption is in the child's vocabulary early on, and adoption is celebrated in their lives.

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