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Three Months Pregnant - What Are My Options?

What to Do if You're 3 Months Pregnant and Don't Want Baby

An unplanned pregnancy can throw everything out of balance. You had your life patterns, the rhythms of your day and week. You have goals and dreams to pursue; problems to solve. And then this new reality comes crashing in, uninvited, and you don’t know what to do, especially if you are three months pregnant and don’t want the baby.

We’re here to help. No matter if you are 13 weeks pregnant and don’t want the baby or nine weeks pregnant and want to give the baby up for adoption, this guide to unplanned pregnancy options in your third month will help. There are solutions to the emotions you’ve been processing during these three months. With the right information, and the right help, your unexpected pregnancy can be handled in a way that keeps your future dreams alive.

First Things to Consider

You’re probably noticing significant changes to your body at this point in your pregnancy. Obviously, a pregnancy has significant impacts on you physically. The strength of women to bear children may be the closest thing we see to an everyday miracle. That’s why it is so important to stay on top of your health during your pregnancy. Before considering what options you have when you are nine or 10 weeks pregnant and don’t want it, make sure you are seeing a medical professional. During this third month, you’ll be experiencing some unique things.

  • 9 Weeks Pregnant: You’re getting close to the point when most people start to announce their pregnancies. The fetus is around the size of a cherry, but is already beginning to take the shape of a little baby. Unfortunately, this week can be the most intense for some pregnancy symptoms.

  • 10 Weeks Pregnant: It’s about time for maternity clothes, because that baby bump is starting to take shape. There may be some pain in your midsection accompanying this, as your body changes to make room for your new baby.

  • 11 Weeks Pregnant: The baby’s growth is rapid at this point in pregnancy. In four weeks, he or she has gone from the size of a blueberry to the size of a lime.

  • 12 Weeks Pregnant: You’re almost to the end of the first trimester, which can be the most difficult time for pregnancy-related symptoms. This is around the time when you will most likely get a first trimester screen to check on the baby’s development.

  • 13 Weeks Pregnant: It’s common to have an ultrasound around week 13, because your baby has formed most of its important body parts. In fact, he or she could have already begun moving the fingers and toes. At this point, you’re one-third of the way through your pregnancy. 

Unplanned Pregnancy Options

It can be difficult to be nine or 10 weeks pregnant and not want to be pregnant anymore. Thankfully, you have options for how to handle your unexpected pregnancy. You also have some time to decide on what is best for you. This is a big choice. It’s good to research your options thoroughly before deciding. Those options are:

  • Parenting: If you’re still considering raising your child, but you’re worried it will be too difficult, there are social services and other resources to help. Parenthood can be a wonderful opportunity.

  • Abortion: Abortion laws can fluctuate on a state-by-state basis, and they can change rapidly. In the last several years, many state legislatures with conservative majorities have attempted to enact strict limits on abortion, with some voting on banning abortion as early as six weeks into pregnancy. If you are considering abortion, you may need to act more quickly, depending on where you live.

  • Adoption: It’s common to hear the phrase “give a baby up for adoption.” But adoption is not “giving up” at all. It is a brave decision made by a loving mother who wants what is best for her child. Whether you are nine, 12 or 13 weeks pregnant and don’t want the baby, you can choose adoption. There are many benefits of adoption for the child, but also for you.

Three Months Pregnant and Don’t Want the Baby: Choosing Adoption

Adoption isn’t for everyone, but it may be the best choice you can make. If you think adoption is right for you, there are good reasons to begin the adoption process when you are three months pregnant and don’t want the baby. In the adoption process, you’ll do things like choose an adoptive family, get to know the family through pre-placement contact, receive adoption financial assistance and create a hospital plan. If you choose adoption early on in your pregnancy, you have more time to work with an adoption specialist to make each of these important decisions.

Of course, you shouldn’t rush into this choice. Adoption isn’t always easy, and there is still a loss involved. But there can also be joy in the decision, knowing that you are reclaiming your life and giving your baby an opportunity to have a great life.

Next Steps for Your Unplanned Pregnancy

If you think adoption could be right for you, or if you need more information about your choices, you can call 1-800-ADOPTION at any time. An adoption specialist would love to speak with you about each of your options, and you’ll never be pressured into choosing adoption.

It’s not easy when you are three months pregnant and don’t want the baby, but you can make the best of this difficult situation.

Disclaimer
Information available through these links is the sole property of the companies and organizations listed therein. America Adoptions, Inc. provides this information as a courtesy and is in no way responsible for its content or accuracy.

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Frequently Asked Questions

Why is American Adoptions the right adoption agency choice for many birth mothers?

American Adoptions is one of the largest licensed adoption agencies in the United States. Each year, we work with thousands of women who are facing an unplanned pregnancy and offer assistance to these women. Our large, caring staff is able to assist you seven days a week and provide you with one-on-one counseling about your pregnancy and available options.

You should choose an adoption agency where you feel completely comfortable with their services and staff. With American Adoptions, you will work with an Adoption Specialist who is on-call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The Adoption Specialist will be your advocate and will provide support and guidance as you create an adoption plan that is right for you.

How will the family tell my child about me and the adoption when my child is older?

Each family has their own style of introducing adoption to the child. When you are matched with an adoptive family, you can ask them this question. If you would like your Adoption Specialist to discuss it for you, just let her know. He or she can share your wishes or provide good ideas from other adoptive families.

You will also be able to share what you want your baby to know about you. You can complete a keepsake booklet to share hobbies, stories, photos of you and your family and a letter to your baby. The adoptive family can provide this to your child as he or she grows older. Be as creative as you like! Some birth mothers have even knitted a special blanket as a gift to their baby or given a similar symbol of their love.

The father of your baby can fill out the birth father's keepsake booklet or write a letter too. You may have other family members who would also like to share photos or a letter to the baby. This is your opportunity to pass on your and your family's love and to share your personality, history and reasons for choosing adoption. The adoptive family will treasure whatever information you provide and will share it with the baby at an appropriate age. In most adoptive homes, the word adoption is in the child's vocabulary early on, and adoption is celebrated in their lives.

Additional Resources

Teen Pregnancy - Information for Young Women

While not every woman who chooses adoption is a young mother, many are. Through adoption, many young women have found an ability to give their babies the best life possible, while finding the opportunity to realize their own dreams, as well. Call American Adoptions today at 1-800-ADOPTION.

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Adoption Glossary

Do adoption terms and phrases leave you feeling confused? Learn the meaning to key adoption words and phrases with our comprehensive adoption glossary.

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